Excerpts from the eulogy delivered by Ruby Chen at the grave of his son, Staff Sgt. Itay Chen, who was slain fighting Hamas terrorists on October 7, 2023, and his body abducted to Gaza. Itay’s body was returned on November 4, 2025, and laid to rest in Kiryat Shaul Cemetery in Tel Aviv on November 9.

Itai, how is it possible to stand before your grave and feel relief, perhaps even joy, that, after 760 days, you have returned to us. Joy that is accompanied by and simultaneous with that pain of the loss of a part of my body, a part of my soul. I prayed for a different ending, but of all the possibilities that could have happened, of all the scenarios that raced through my mind, this was apparently the least terrible outcome of them all…

Your mother and I always watched to see how you would grow up and what you would do with your life, because you had so much potential, in so many areas. As a young child, you were always busy. Perhaps you knew that you didn’t have much time… Examples abound. There was that day when you decided, simply, one morning, to stop stuttering. And you stopped. Or your decision that you were excellent at wall-climbing. Or your excellence at basketball — and then came that terrible day for a father, when you were about 15, when you beat me at basketball without me making it easy… I sent you to my friend Yossi, 1 meter 90, an ex-pro, and you beat him, too.

And then you got to the army, and again decided to excel… You joined the Peretz [tank] crew… You didn’t tell me what you were doing…

On that most terrible day in our history…, you were lions, standing on the most forward of the front lines, the most dangerous. You went forward into an inferno, waged the war of your lives, a war of heroes, to save as many civilians as you could from the cruel fate. You, the Peretz crew, and too few other warriors who were there at 6.20 a.m., moved forward, looked the devil’s emissaries in the eye, until they eventually averted their gaze.

Get The Times of Israel’s Daily Edition
by email and never miss our top stories

By signing up, you agree to the terms

The word “hero” is sometimes used too lightly. Very few truly deserve it. But you, Itay, together with the Peretz crew, the universe assigned you the most important role of all: to save lives. And today, after 760 days, you finally receive from the people of Israel the hero’s medal you deserve…


Staff Sgt. Itay Chen (Courtesy)

Thanks to you and other warrior heroes, from the War of October 7 — and no, we will not call this cursed war the War of Revival — a unique chapter of heroism is written in your blood that many will talk of in the history of the people of Israel.

This chapter reflects the true values of the people of Israel — mutual responsibility, camaraderie, care for the other, values that were a binding order for the warriors…

And here I want to turn personally to Minister Ofer Sofer, the government’s representative. Of all the members of the government, for our family you most emblemize the Jewish values we grew up on. That is why you are here today, as you were on Friday for the Neutra family.

And from here I ask you, when your colleagues in government forget what are the true values of Judaism, and when you see those who pursue honor instead of humility, power instead of helping others, money and backroom deals with taxpayers’ money instead of ‘love thy neighbor as thyself’, invite them here. I’ll be here, and we’ll walk around together and visit Israeli hero Asaf Hamami and the other heroes in this sacred place. And we’ll set them straight, or we will throw them out, damn them…

You were my heroic son. Your commanders misled you. They told you that your next significant battle would be in the north, and not in Gaza. Our politicians also gave Hamas motivation to attack. Because those politicians did not want to listen to the army commanders who came to tell them that there was danger at the door of the State of Israel, and that the ranks must be unified, that the flames of public discourse must be lowered. But they didn’t listen.


Hagit (R) and Ruby Chen at the funeral of their son, slain hostage soldier Itay Chen, at the Kiryat Shaul Military Cemetery in Tel Aviv, November 9, 2025. (Shai Hazan/Israeli Pro-Democracy Protest Movement)

And here at your grave, my precious son, hero of Israel, I promise you that your mother, father and many others will pursue the guilty ones who put you in an unprotected base, without backup, on that terrible Shabbat. And those commanders who stayed back and did not come to help on that day. And also the politicians, who were meant to be the responsible adults in the room, with the prime responsibility for the security of Israel. We will hound them all, and we will not stop, until they are required, under oath, to answer to the people of Israel, and to take their responsibility — all within the framework of a state commission of inquiry.

It wasn’t only our lives that stopped on October 7. The lives of many families of the fallen and the murdered. The lives of thousands of army wounded. We all owe them so much. An entire nation is standing now and awaiting answers, waiting for justice to be seen and to be done with those who are guilty of the catastrophe. As Menachem Begin said many years ago, There are judges in Jerusalem, and we trust them…


Released hostage Matan Angrest (with hand on heart) at the funeral of crewmate Staff Sgt. Itay Chen, at the military cemetery in Kiryat Shaul Cemetery in Tel Aviv on November 9, 2025 (Chaim Goldberg/Flash90)

My son, although you are the main hero, you gave us a task in the international area — to be on the front line of the families that battled to return the 255 hostages. And here I want to say a few words in English.

Our journey has been a long one to bring Itay home, but we found many allies, good people that felt our suffering and pain and wanted to help us bring the hostages home.

During those first days, we will always be grateful to President Biden and his team that provided us an envelope of support. I will always remember President Biden calling us after we received the news in March 2024 that Itay most likely did not survive on October 7. He called me as a father, knowing that I am an orphan, and spoke to me as a father that knows how to cope with loss. And he said to me, take a pencil, write a number, call me whenever you need to talk to somebody. Shows you what kind of man he is.

There was Jake Sullivan that said to me a sentence and I believed him: he said the last thing I think about before falling asleep is can I bring you kid back home and all the others back home. There are many others but I would like to recognize someone in the audience that got on a plane to be with us today: David Cotter. David was in the White House Counter Terrorism team and our liaison in the White House and was the one that
organized those first meetings in the White House and made sure the hostages issue stays a priority. David – I love you, man.

I would like to thank the members of the Senate and Congress that adopted us, and it was beautiful to see when walking in the halls of the Congress all those pictures — not just of US hostages in Gaza, but of all of the 255 hostages. Sometimes I needed to remind myself, you’re not in the Israeli parliament.

When President Trump was elected, we immediately requested from Jake Sullivan and Brett McGurk not to drop the ball and continue to work in unison with the new incoming team, and God bless them, that is what they did.

Eulogy by Special Envoy for Peace Missions Steve Witkoff at the Funeral of Itay Chen pic.twitter.com/KxSxzVVYgP

— Bring Them Home Now (@bringhomenow) November 9, 2025

I will never forget the first meeting with incoming NSA Waltz, and he put on the line Steve Witkoff — God bless him — and hearing his voice and his commitment, I knew he would not give up until the last hostage is back home. Steve really wanted to be here today with us but the schedules could not work. Steve was so instrumental in having President Trump adopt all the hostages and specifically explaining to him why the families of the fallen hostages like Itay need so much to have them back with us and have a place to mourn.

I would also like to thank so many others from the administration: VP Vance, who we met last month and looked us in the eye and said the US will bring Itay home; Secretary Rubio, who gave my family his only State of the Union ticket when he was a Senator and has been fighting with us since day one; Jared Kushner, who I dare call a friend, who was always willing to give good advice even before President Trump was elected; Sebastian Gorka, Counter Terrorism lead in the White House who adopted me even though I was sometimes a bit difficult with him. And I would also like to thank Ambassador Steffen Siebert that gave us as a German
family so much support and empathy.

Itay, you were part of a new generation of Zionism, a generation that, to everyone’s regret, and our immense grief, had to forge its Zionism with fire, and blood and much sacrifice.


Alon Chen, younger brother of slain hostage soldier Itay Chen, speaks at his funeral, in Tel Aviv, November 9, 2025. (Paulina Patimer/Hostages and Missing Families Forum)

You have set higher standards for your friends who have been left behind, that will help them build a state with more values, a state that sanctifies life and mutual responsibility, truly sanctifies it, not just as lip service. It is possible to build something different, and we will be here to make sure it happens, to make sure that your sacrifice and those of the other lions will not be in vain. The darkness cannot be reduced but the light you left behind can be enlarged a little.

For two years of struggle and endless meetings, we always said that Itay’s return was a life-saving act. And so it was — Itay’s return saved the life of my family. And that is what must happen with all the families whose loved ones have not yet returned. The lives of the families of the fallen hostages must be saved. They need their loved ones back. And certainly the Goldin family, which has become a symbol of nobility. I apologize that I was not with them for their nine years of struggle before our terrible war.

אי אפשר ואסור להתעלם מהדברים של רובי חן, היום בהלווית בנו סמ״ר איתי חן ולמחיאות כפיים מהציבור שבא לנחם ולחזק את זוג ההורים חגית ורובי שמצדיעים לבנם ״מלך האריות שלהם״

״אתה היית הבן הגיבור שלי. המפקדים שלך הטעו אותך, אמרו לך שהקרב המשמעותי הבא הולך להיות בצפון ולא בעזה.… pic.twitter.com/mRmj21eLA3

— ????️????????חגית קלימן – Hagit Klaiman????????????️ (@klaiman14) November 9, 2025

In my view, victory in the War of October 7 is not the occupation fantasy of a minority of Israeli society, which always sees a bleak future seeded with endless fear.

Victory in this war is first and foremost the brave and difficult decision today — to return the last of the hostages, which is the beginning of the journey to turn a page for a better future, and then to begin a true soul-searching, which is a prerequisite for renewing the people’s trust in their government. I pray that there will be enough worthy leaders in the country who will know how to lead to this right place.

Itay, I am letting you go but your soul is with us forever. I apologize that it took two years to bring you back. I pledge to you: We will settle accounts with those who say it was impossible to bring you back sooner, because they dragged their feet with considerations light-years away from national security, and 42 soldiers and Israeli civilians who were abducted alive returned in coffins.

Our uncertainty is over. We find a little comfort in the fact that you did not suffer in captivity, and we now have a place to be with you whenever we want. From this place, we will try to find the strength to move on to the next, sad, phase in our lives.

Dad and mom are separating from you now, hero of Israel, our lion king, Staff Sgt. Itay Chen, IDF No. 9268698, and we salute you.


Ruby and Hagit, the parents of Staff Sgt. Itay Chen, salute their son at his funeral at the military cemetery in Kiryat Shaul Cemetery in Tel Aviv on November 9, 2025 (Chaim Goldberg/Flash90)