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Jay Leno shared the emotional challenges of caring for his wife, Mavis, who has advanced dementiaLeno said that Mavis relived the same upsetting memory every day for three years, which Leno describes as the “toughest part” of navigating her diseaseLeno says that despite the difficulties, he likes being able to comfort Mavis

Jay Leno revealed a heartbreaking struggle his wife of nearly 45 years, Mavis Leno, experienced due to her advanced dementia. 

Speaking with Hoda Kotb on the Today show on Thursday, Nov. 20, Leno opened up about one of the challenges in being his wife’s caretaker. 

“Probably the toughest part was every day she’d wake up and realize someone had called today to tell her her mother had passed away,” the former Tonight Show host recalled. “And her mother died every day for, like, three years.”

Jay Leno and Mavis Leno attend the private unveiling of the Meyers Manx electric automobile on August 08, 2022 in Malibu, California.

Michael Tullberg/Getty

Leno described the moment Mavis remembered her mother’s death as particularly traumatic because it was like she was learning of it for the first time. 

“Not just crying, I mean, you’re learning for the first time. And that was really tricky,” he shared. 

Mavis Leno and Jay Leno in April 2024.

Amy Sussman/Getty

Much of Mavis’ emotional care involves Leno comforting his wife amid her confusion. 

“She wants to be reassured that everything’s okay,” he said. “Now she really needs me and I like that. And I can tell she appreciates it. The idea that you get married, you take these vows, nobody ever thinks they’ll be called upon to act on them. You know that part – for better or worse. Even the worse isn’t that bad.” 

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Mavis’ diagnosis became public knowledge in January 2024 when Leno filed for a conservatorship of Mavis’ estate. Since then, she has experienced fluctuations in her condition. 

“Her appetite’s really come back,” Leno said of his wife. “I wish I could take her out and go out to eat and things like that, but you can’t really. We’ll get some help and we’ll take her out in the car and drive around and look at stuff. She likes that. I feel bad. You reach this point in your life where she loves to travel and I’m sad she can’t do those things.” 

Mavis Leno and Jay Leno in October 2014.

Gregg DeGuire/WireImage

Above all, Leno is just as smitten as he was at the start of their romance. 

“When she looks at me and smiles and says she loves me, I melt,” he shared. 

Leno opened up to PEOPLE earlier this month about his caregiving role.

“It’s not work, because people come up, and say they feel so sorry. I understand the sympathy, because I know a lot of people are going through it, but it’s okay,” Leno said. “I like taking care of her. I enjoy her company, and we have a good time. We have fun with it, and it is what it is,”