Welcome to our first week with an actual football game on our color TVs for the first time since February. That’s right. The best week of the year is HERE, baby …

Hall of Fame Game week! Three days, and we’re all settling in for 5 minutes of football-watching before flipping back to another King of Queens rerun on Cozi TV. But it’ll be an amazing five minutes. Fire up the grill. Get the coolers ready. Can we bet this game? You bet your ass we can. And we will. Blindly. 

Let’s roll. 

Welcome to a Monday Nightcaps – the one where we embrace our wild side with Olivia Dunne, and go from there. 

What else? I’ve got a LOADED weekend of #content, Tiff Ann whips up some lobster, Trump pulls an all-time move on the golf course, and wait till you see how many people showed up for the Colbert protest over the weekend. 

The Libs are just so embarrassing. And I should know, because I apparently am one! You’ll see. 

Grab you whatever you need to get you through the final Monday of July, and settle in for a football week ‘Cap!

Let’s attack this week with more vigor than these Colbert defenders did yesterday

Hate to start the week on a sad note, but I have no choice here. In one of the most shocking developments of 2025, I have been accused of being a closet liberal. 

A closet lib! The very same people I spend 90% of my days mocking. Imagine going through life thinking everything was all ham & eggs, and then waking up to this email on a slow Saturday in July:

From JB:

Zach – so you know, we’re all pretty sure you are a closet Democrat. It’s become more and more obvious.

NO!!!! How does that happen? What did I do? And who is “all of us?” Was it all my Nantucket talk from last week? Has to be, right? 

I went back and looked just to make sure I wasn’t missing anything, and I don’t think I am. Here are some of my headlines from last week alone:

What Does The WNBA Owe Angel Reese After Launching Up Nine Turnovers In A Blowout Loss?NASCAR Kills Wokeness With Most Pro-America Commercial In DecadesEx-Indians Manager Terry Francona Blames White People Who Like Trump For Name ChangeShockingly Dumb Democrats Forced To Delete Tweet After It Inadvertently Showed How Bad Things Were Under BidenWoke Starbucks Makes Disgusting Announcement That We Shouldn’t Tolerate

I mean, my God. What else can I do?! Again, it has to be the Nantucket stuff, right? Here’s the deal. I don’t BS about my past or who I am. I’m pretty open about coming from money. Yeah, I grew up vacationing on Nantucket. Whatever. BFD. You all realize that doesn’t mean I have money, right? I do not. I promise. 

I’m poor. I chose to write for a living. I live in a 1700 square foot house in Florida that’s barely big enough for my two kids. I drink Kentucky Gentleman, and I’m proud to do so. I illegally stream (allegedly) because I don’t want to spend $90 a month on YouTube TV. I have a DeSantis sign in my yard from the midterms two years ago. 

Side note: It would be objectively hilarious for me to one day just pull the rug out from everyone and come out as a raging Kamala guy. The fallout would be amazing. 

Ain’t gonna happen though. You think I wanna end up like these lunatics?

What a weekend of #content!

I mean, come on. That’s just perfect. It’s another example of Hollywood being so out of touch with the rest of America. 

Nobody gives a shit that Colbert got fired. Frankly, America by and large was thrilled because he’s A) not funny, and B) a Trump-hater. I’d also wager to say that most of the country didn’t even realize he was still on the air. 

But dummies like Jimmy Kimmel and Julia Louis-Dreyfus and obese Stacey Abrams are all crying foul because they think Trump ordered CBS to fire him. This is just the perfect picture for America right now. The media makes something obscure a huge deal and acts like it’s the worst thing in the world. In reality, only 20 people show up to “protest” it. Idiots. 

OK, let’s get to the best #content from a weekend full of it!

Trump’s drop, Livvy’s golf cart ride & how about this beach Karen?

Whew. What a weekend. What a way to end July! Couple thoughts …

1. Good to see the climate change Libs are out in full force right now. It’s hot in Florida this time of year, haven’t you heard? You know who hasn’t noticed? Literally anyone who lives in Florida. 

We stopped checking the weather down here sometime around Cinco de Mayo. You know why? Because it’s hot as shit from then until after Halloween. No use in checking it. It all feels the same, every single day. In other news, it’s going to rain at my house between 2 and 5 today. 

2. How about the Bucs just putting a weighted vest on that massive human being and making him walk laps in this heat? Old school. Love it. 

3. I’ve never seen a pair of boobs melt the Libs quite like Sydney Sweeney’s have this calendar year. What a run. 

4. Tiff Ann knows her way around a lobster roll, clearly. 

5. Trump is 100% right about a bad day on the golf course beating a good day anywhere else. I haven’t golfed in two months. It’s the longest I’ve gone without swinging a golf club in years, which means I’ll break 80 the next time I tee it up. 

Speaking of … let’s rapid-fire this Monday class into a big Monday night. What a MOVE:

Hilarious. What’s our consensus here? Did Trump hit it OB and his caddie just dropped a ball for him? Or, did he pull the ultimate move and just act like he found it? 

I’ve done that last one a thousand times, by the way. Luckily, I don’t have to use it nearly as much as I used to, but you can bet your ass I’ve miraculously found my ball in the woods after 5 minutes of looking many times. 

Let’s not act like we all haven’t been there before. It’s called speeding up the pace of play on the course, Libs. Look it up!

Next? Let’s head back down to climate change capital of the world and check in with beachgoers over in Tampa:

Look, I despise the beach. Hate, hate, hate it. Shocking, I know, given I’ve lived in Florida my whole life, but it’s how I feel. 

That being said, if you don’t want an unobstructed view … put your stupid little lawn chair closer to the water. Simple. There, I fixed it for you. If you leave any space whatsoever, it’s fair game. Anyone with half a brain knows that. I see plenty of unmarked territory here between this chick and the ocean. That’s on her, not them. 

The music part? I’ll agree with her there. The worst. If you’re gonna blare music, sit in the back. The breeze will carry it away from everyone. Again, it’s Beach 101. 

OK, that’s it for today. Good start to the week! Let’s all hop on a golf cart – this time with Livvy Dunne – and head into a big final few days of July. 

See you Wednesday. 

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).

Am I a closet Lib? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.