We’ve seen a lot of weird and wacky ways to wrap up the Festive 500 over the years. The challenge, to ride 500 km between Christmas and New Year’s, naturally brings out a bit of weirdness in anyone willing to take on the miles. But Matthew Fairbrother’s Fast Food 500 could take the cake. Or, er, fries.
The Fast Food Festive 500
The New Zealand rider set a new bar for ridiculous Festive 500 rides by completing the entire distance within the confines of a McDonald’s drive through. You can check out the ride and stats on Strava.
We all know someone who has found a weird way to finish the Festive 500. I thought a friend had the crown for most repetitive when he rode the entire 500 over hundreds of 1.9km laps around UVic’s Ring Road a few years ago. But Fairbrother’s loop is much more mind-numbingly small and repetitive.
For those counting, it took roughly 2650 laps to make up 500km. The McDonald’s was closed for the holiday, giving the Kiwi rider a 30-hour window to finish the milage. That also meant that no, there were no fries with that.
Fairbrother shared that he switched directions every four hours, just to keep it (and his tires) “fresh.” He also explains that, while the distance is accurate, that elevation gain is probably a function of a small sensor quirk magnified by a staggering number of laps.
“Mentally, it’s relentless”
If you’re thinking this sounds kind of mad, Fairbrother says that’s kind of the point.
“My life is usually built around goals, purpose, and process. Big projects with a thousand moving parts; logistics, terrain, weather, risk, timelines and always needing to think five steps ahead,” the Kiwi explained in his post. “Every now and then it’s nice to strip all of that back and do something purely for the sake of it. With no meaning, no destination to reach. Just turning up and letting my stubbornness do the work.”
The monotony and complete lack of reward ends up being the reward.
“What makes a challenge like this weirdly appealing is the simplicity. Physically it’s manageable, mentally it’s relentless. The same loop, the same sights and a million different thoughts, keeping the peace becomes the real challenge.”
The most inward challenge in a long history of hard rides
While Fairbrother’s Fast Food 500 used monotony to take a trip deep into his mind and test his mental strength, he’s long found ways to challenge himself in more obviously appealing ways.
If you’re not familiar, Fairbrother is a New Zealand rider who made a name for himself doing unreasonably hard, but different and interesting challenges. Like bikepacking – er, enduro-packing between Enduro World Series rounds in 2022. Then again when it became the Enduro World Cup rounds. Or riding Vancouver’s brutal mountain bike Triple Crown ride, back-to-back-back. Yes, that is a Triple Triple Crown. Or, more recently, riding a 306km, 6,000m descent from Europe’s highest ridable peak to the sea.
As he explains in his post on the FF500, part of his motivation for such a seemingly silly ride is preparation for bigger challenges.
“Somewhere within the stupidity is a controlled space to test patience, self-talk, boredom, and resilience. Skills I’ll need when the stakes actually matter and the consequences are real.”
We’re sure the Kiwi enduro packer has plenty of big plans ahead to make good use of his now-proven mental stamina. We can’t wait to see what those plans are.