Welcome one and welcome all to another Fridays Rugby News as we stand on the precipice of the SRP final this weekend, and only a few weeks away from the kick off to the Test Season.

We kick off today with the antics of a Kiwi #9 in ‘Milking It?’. Preview what shapes as a cracking SRP final with ‘Bring it On!’. Take a look at St Joes last official Wallaby squad in ‘Testing Times’. Go behind the scenes and look what’s involved with ‘In Transition’. Take a look at week three of SRW with ‘Tahs biggest challenge yet’. Before wrapping up another rugby week in ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, wondering where my invite to speak at the National Press Club might be: given mentally unhinged, gibbering maniacs are now able to hold centre stage?

‘What are you doing after work?’

Milking It?

Gamesmanship, unsportsmanlike conduct and disgusting behaviour? Or: opportunist and just clever ‘heads-up’ rugby’?

The whole world has had an opinion on those ‘antics’ of Cam Roigard last week in the semi-final against the Auckland Blues. Seemingly injured one moment from a reckless mid-air challenge from a brother of the most penalised AB family of the last 20 years. To a miraculous recovery seconds later (whilst a few concerned Blues players loitered around him to check on his well being), and scarpering 60 metres like a Jack rabbit caught in the carrot patch, and setting up a try for bother #2 of aforementioned recidivist Kiwi rugby family.

I sit somewhere between a reversal of the penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct and bringing the game into disrepute, to a cheese for unsportsmanlike conduct and bringing the game into disrepute. I am not outraged as such, but just thought it was a really poor decision by Roigard. Perhaps the ‘stain’ against his name and reputation that will linger as long as he plays might be punishment enough. He may want to drop Trevor Chappell a line and see how things like this linger for a little while in the memory of sports fans.

Either way, don’t reckon we’ll see him ‘milking it’ again.

Bring it On.

Saturday 20 June 5:05 pm AEST – Hurricanes v Chiefs at Hnry Stadium, Wellington,Stan Sport

What’s not to like about this one? Perhaps the two best provincial sides in world rugby prepping to tare chunks off each other, whilst no doubt playing with an attacking edge other sides could nairly dream of.

In the yellow corner: 100 tries for the season. 7 scores over 50. Skilled, fit and an attacking juggernaut that just seems to have so much self belief. When one makes a break, there are seemingly 14 backing up in support. I can’t recall a more complete and dangerous attacking side in SR over the last 20 years. Not even the Crusaders at their peak, match this lot for sheer attacking brilliance.

In the red corner: Perhaps a side unlucky not to be considered ‘dynastic’. Fourth final in a row, but with no championship rings to show for it. Perhaps the most physically dominant ruck side in the whole competition. Their speed of play on their own ball is lightning quick. Couple that with their disruptive abilities when in D and you have a wonderful ‘weapon’ at your disposal.

All blacks everywhere you look. The Canes with a #9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 & #15 axis that could very well be dressed nearly in All Black in a few weeks time. Against a Chiefs side with the SRP POTY in their ranks, a formidable forward pack and the wizardry of D-Mac conducting it all!

Whats not to like!

Fearless Prediction: Chiefs forwards to be the difference at ruck time. Chiefs by 4.

HURRICANES (1-15): Xavier Numia, Asafo Aumua, Pasilio Tosi, Isaia Walker-Leawere, Warner Dearns, Devan Flanders, Du’Plessis Kirifi (co-c), Peter Lakai, Cam Roigard, Ruben Love, Fehi Fineanganofo, Jordie Barrett (co-c), Billy Proctor, Josh Moorby, Callum Harkin

Replacements: Jacob Devery, Siale Lauaki, Tyrel Lomax, Brad Shields, Brayden Iose, Ereatara Enari, Jone Rova, Kini Naholo

CHIEFS (1-15): Ollie Norris, Samisoni Taukei’aho, Sione Ahio, Josh Lord, Tupou Vaa’i, Samipeni Finau, Luke Jacobson (c), Simon Parker, Cortez Ratima, Damian McKenzie, Kyren Taumoefolau, Quinn Tupaea, Kyle Brown, Leroy Carter, Liam Coombes-Fabling

Replacements: Brodie McAlister, Jared Proffit, George Dyer, Seuseu Naitoa Ah Kuoi, Kaylum Boshier, Xavier Roe, Josh Jacomb, Reon Paul

Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: Reuben Keane, Louis Trisley TMO: Brett Cronan

The answer is always closer than you think.

Testing Times.

The test season is upon us and St Joe will release his Nations Cup squad later today. I will update the article when known. You can then compare the official G&GR Wallaby squad, as voted by you, is here.

In the mean time, Owens’ Dad has also named his Oirish squad to tour down under:

Forwards: Tadhg Beirne, Billy Bohan, Thomas Clarkson, Jack Conan, Caelan Doris, Tadhg Furlong, Sam Illo, Cormac Izuchukwu, Sean Jansen, Ronan Kelleher, Jeremy Loughman, Joe McCarthy, Darragh Murray, Tom O’Toole, Cian Prendergast, James Ryan, Dan Sheehan, Tom Stewart, Nick Timoney, Josh van der Flier

Backs: Bundee Aki, Rob Baloucoune, Harry Byrne, Craig Casey, Nathan Doak, Ciaran Frawley, Jamison Gibson-Park, Robbie Henshaw, Hugo Keenan, Stuart McCloskey, Jimmy O’Brien, Tommy O’Brien, Jamie Osborne, Sam Prendergast, Garry Ringrose, Jacob Stockdale

Yowie’s a fan.

In Transition.

The above leads nicely into the current ‘transitioning’ of national coaches into roles within the Wallabies.

These next three tests will be the last of St Joes tenure as head coach of the Wallabies. And to look at win-loss ratio alone, would be a complete injustice to the steadying influence Joe has had on the team, but perhaps more importantly, on the code as a whole, given the nature of the complete shit-show he inherited.

No doubt Les Kiss is currently on the periphery of the the Wallaby camp, and I would imagine he has more than a few fingerprints and input into the final make-up of the Nations Cup squad. Just how successful the whole coaching transition, which had it’s origins way back in 2025, will be, won’t be fully visible to well after this current international season ends, or perhaps at best, the northern tour.

Whilst Kiss is bringing ‘his team’ into the role, the great news for all Rugby fans is that St Joe and Mike Cron are remaining in our rugby ecosystem. St Joe moving to a coach-whispering role within Australia A (and remaining available to Kiss as a ‘consultant’ whenever required). Whilst Emmanuelle is working for RA touring the country identifying piggie talent and getting hold of them early to drill them on the dark arts.

Credit must go to RA and all involved for the foresight and commitment to see the transition plans through. Ideally we would all like an Oz side playing this Saturday’s final (expecting it to be the Reds – hence Wendy Matthews delayed Wallaby start date). But even when that fell apart, RA stood it’s ground, committed to the plan and gave all certainty. Temptation has been averted and in doing so, the complete shite show that absolutely would have entuated.

The coaching set up under Kiss includes: John Ulugia (scrum coach), Jonny Fisher (player development), Scott McLeod (defence), Tom Donnelly (forwards/lineout), Eoin Toolan (skills coach). The plans have been seen through and they are just about implemented. It’s now time for results from the get-go.

The time for transitioning will soon be at an end.

The battle for second to fifth.

Tahs biggest challenge yet.

Saturday June 20 12:05 pm AEST – Fijiana Drua v ACT Brumbies at Four R Stadium, Ba, on Stan Sport

The Drua had a great escape last week after the Force decided they didn’t really want to win that game anyway. And a rare back-to-back home game will see them far to good for a travelling Brumbies side who are average at the best of times.

Fearless Prediction: Drua by 26

Saturday June 20 4:05 pm AEST – Western Force v Queensland Reds at Wanneroo Rugby Club, Perth, on Stan Sport

The Force blew it last week in the Island of dodgy drinking water. Travel, heat, humidity and a resurgent Drua saw them pipped at the post. Travelling back to an equally tropical third world this week, may prove a bridge too far for the Force. Even if the Reds are entirely underwhelming

Fearless Prediction: Reds by 13.

The Tahs have a buy this weekend, which ironically will also be their biggest challenge this season. I’d suggest just giving them the trophy now. Just saves time and makes sense.

You heard it here first eventually!’

Friday’s Goss with Hoss.

Walsh walk’s in?

Whispers growing louder that Tim Walsh will soon be announced as Technical Director of Australian Women’s Rugby, both 7’s and XV’s. Whilst not confirmed, the Inside Line team on Stan, report it a fait accompli.

With his 7’s pedigree beyond reproach, and he’s fitness drills famous for inducing ‘cromiting’ (crying whilst vomiting – during training) and mental toughness, Walsh would look like an excellent choice. You only have to look at his tenure and success with our best female sports team in the land (7’s) and hope that translates to our XV’s, who have regressed substantially, in all facets of their game.

Around and around they go.

With the Aussie sides licking their wounds, the post season player merry-go-round is in full swing with some notable player movements. News this week that rugby geriatric, Caydern Neville has signed with the reds.

In other news, seemingly Tah-bound Harry McLaughlin Phillips has signed with the Force. HMP probably said: ‘the Tahs? Why would I sign with that shit-show! Isn’t that old fart Foley coming back anyway? No thanks, rather go over to One Nation central’. News last night that Lawson Creighton is off to Ospreys. Darby Lancaster has signed with the Auckland Blues. And in extremely disappointing news for the Brumbies, Tane Edmed has decided to stay put.

Gong, going: not yet.

It seems Jimmy ‘Nic’ Slips isn’t retired after all. Big Sexy (who has been around since dirt was invented) telling scribes this week he is making himself available for Wallaby selection, should his form, or injury impacts, necessitate same. Indeed should Nic hand around long enough he might even make RWC #5, putting him in rare company and smashing a heap of longevity awards along the way.

I think the key phrase here is ‘should his form warrant it’. I am a huge fan of Slips. But: by seasons end time had looked to have caught up. Serviceable SRP prop? Yes. International standard test prop? Hmmmmmm.

Super Kid Sid.

In a rare piece of good news for the Tahs, wunderkind Sid Harvey has been named SRP rookie of the year, also finishing fourth in the overall POTY voting. Not a bad result considering he only played 10 times and that for a team that was completely shite as well.

Rigged.

There was a tie in the over SRP POTY voting, with Tupaea and Tavatavanawai finishing on 43 votes, with the Chiefs midfielder, and Darcy Swain fan club president, winning the tie-breaker with more ‘three votes’ from the voting team during the season.

The Lord giveth.

And he taketh away. Retiring Wallaby D coach and beard softening product ambassador, Lord Laurie Fisher, has spoken candidly with Professor Payto over at the SMH. It was honest, insightful, and totally devoid of giving any hope at all to Wallaby fans of our chances of winning anything, anytime soon. For me personally, being a Tahs fan, I had already abandoned hope a looooooong time ago anyway.

Until next week

Hoss -out.