![\"Destanee](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/1a1ff2d2c723eba4cd56b21b1c68d2e1c6fd52db.jpeg\")
<\/p>\nAiava detailed her one-of-a-kind tennis journey in a wide-ranging interview at a Narre Warren South park on Monday afternoon, where she revealed that she was in a \u201cbeautiful\u201d place after unburdening herself.<\/p>\n
She wrote the lengthy social media post, which has created international headlines, before last month\u2019s Australian Open, but made up her mind during a scenic holiday to Finland and Ireland afterwards.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Destanee Aiava is at peace with her decision to retire from tennis.Credit: Eddie Jim<\/p>\n
It was there that Aiava realised a break from tennis was not what she needed. After five years of wrestling with retirement, she came to the realisation the sport that tortured her mentally and caused her continual self-doubts was stopping her from living her best life.<\/p>\n
\u201cI found it hard to shut off, and I was angry at myself for not being able to do that, but then something clicked, and one day I was just like, \u2018Where I am at the moment is so beautiful, and I am so grateful to be here\u2019,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n
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\u201cI feel like that was something I really struggled to do while I was playing tennis, and I realised that I had no reason to keep playing tennis.<\/p>\n
\u201cI may not have reached my on-court goals, but I wanted to be happy and appreciate being able to breathe air \u2026 I didn\u2019t want to keep playing any more because I wasn\u2019t being fulfilled in any way. I wasn\u2019t enjoying it, but I just never had the courage to stop until now.\u201d<\/p>\n
The problem gamblers Aiava called out in her Instagram post were a constant. Every time she left the court, even after wins or in a doubles match, a message would be waiting on her phone.<\/p>\n
They were irate that she beat the player they bet on, or she conceded too many games. Aiava wants tennis authorities to do more to protect players, but understands it is a difficult one to stop. She has taken it upon herself to go back at them, even calling some of them.<\/p>\n
Not one of them answered, and some blocked her.<\/p>\n
\u201cI just wanted to see first-hand how bad humans can be,\u201d Aiava explained.<\/p>\n
\u201cLately, I\u2019ve been trolling some people back, and spam calling them. It\u2019s not good to do, but I feel like if they\u2019re allowed to do it, then I should at least be allowed to stand up for myself.\u201d<\/p>\n
Aiava has ruled out competing overseas again, and there is a possibility she already hit her last ball, although she left the door ajar to play the odd second-tier professional event within Australia.<\/p>\n
In some ways, it is incredibly sad.<\/p>\n
Aiava, who trained up to eight hours a day from age five<\/a>, was once the top-ranked 14-year-old girl on the planet, and only three years later, was inside the top 150 women\u2019s players in the world.<\/p>\n But in her social media post, she reflected on that time and how trusting the wrong people as an \u201cunprepared and dangerously naive\u201d 17-year-old cost her dearly, adding that \u201cthe trajectory of my career was never the same after that\u201d.<\/p>\n Aiava eventually played in eight grand slam main draws. She had to wait until last year\u2019s Australian Open, which she qualified for, to win her first singles match at that level, over Belgian Greet Minnen.<\/p>\n She is somewhat regretful she did not make this decision after that career-best moment, where she was the toast of the Melbourne major. Away from the adoring crowds who love a winner, life went back to normal once the Australian Open ended.<\/p>\n It was years since Nike and co. stopped sponsoring Aiava.<\/p>\n Her tennis outfits instead came from Kmart<\/a> or were bought secondhand online by then. It was fewer than two years ago that Aiava\u2019s bank account was overdrawn by $40 during a mid-season grind in London. Gaal was pickpocketed on the same trip.<\/p>\n She had to contact her mum, Rosie, to ask for help while waiting for her tournament paycheck to clear.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s scary,\u201d Aiava said.<\/p>\n \u201cBut I wouldn\u2019t take it back. I am honestly really glad I went through that because it taught me so much and made me so aware and grateful for what I have today, even shopping at Kmart for my tennis outfits and playing a lot more tournaments just to make ends meet.<\/p>\n \u201cI didn\u2019t enjoy it at the time, but I look back on it, and I\u2019m really proud that I even went through that. I feel like it\u2019s a good life lesson.\u201d<\/p>\n Loading<\/p>\n Aiava lumps the gamblers in the same bucket as the online trolls who targeted her about her weight, with some cruelly describing her as an \u201celephant\u201d. As Aiava puts it, it was almost every adaptation of \u201cfat\u201d.<\/p>\n \u201cPeople are still messaging me today, saying, \u2018You didn\u2019t succeed because you couldn\u2019t stop eating\u2019,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n It is no surprise with that knowledge to learn that Aiava, who is Polynesian, struggled with eating disorders, including bulimia, throughout her career and even starved herself at times.<\/p>\n \u201cSome of it was because people kept calling me overweight and fat, but it was also because I always saw thinner girls in tennis,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n \u201cI felt like to be a better tennis player, or to get extra opportunities, I had to look like them.\u201d<\/p>\n Aiava also revealed in 2022 that she planned to take her own life, only for three strangers to intervene.<\/p>\n She told this masthead during last year\u2019s Australian Open that she no longer related to the person she was at that time,<\/a> explaining it was \u201ca really low time in my life\u201d and that she needed to hit rock bottom to \u201cbe where I am now\u201d.<\/p>\n Later the same year, after Aiava experienced daily panic attacks at a tournament in Darwin that she made the final at, she sought medical advice. Doctors diagnosed her with borderline personality disorder.<\/p>\n BPD impacts how people manage emotions and relate to others, and can cause instability in relationships, mood swings and impulsive behaviour. Individuals are not born with the condition, and instead it often comes from childhood trauma.<\/p>\n Her parents, Rosie and Mark, are no longer together, but she remains extremely close with her mum and is still in contact with her dad.<\/p>\n \u201cI try not to look back on [my childhood] too much,\u201d Aiava said last year. \u201cI just try to remember the good times, and all the hard work that I put in that has led me up to this point.\u201d<\/p>\n Aiava turned to therapy to deal with her challenges, but part of her enlightenment in recent months came from the Bible.<\/p>\n She grew up a Catholic in a deeply religious family, but was not deeply religious herself.<\/p>\n \u201cI wanted to try something different, just to get some sort of guidance,\u201d Aiava said.<\/p>\n \u201cNo one\u2019s talking back at you, and it\u2019s just words on a book that you can somehow find comfort in. I started reading the Bible, and I started to feel a bit more peaceful, and like I had a purpose, and had something to work towards.\u201d<\/p>\n Tennis will forever be a complicated part of Aiava\u2019s life, but she remains grateful for the opportunities it gave her. She travelled to more than 30 countries, and her career prizemoney of $1.3 million enabled her to buy her first car and home.<\/p>\n She plans to study interior design. <\/p>\n \u201cHopefully in the future, I remember tennis fondly, and I think of all my good memories and all the things I\u2019ve achieved,\u201d Aiava said.<\/p>\n \u201cAt the moment, I\u2019m not at that place, and I always said, when I\u2019m done, I don\u2019t want anything to do with it. I\u2019m still at that place. I know a lot of people have reached out to me and said, \u2018I hope you reconsider\u2019.<\/p>\n \u201cBut that\u2019s far from what I would like to do. I don\u2019t want to do anything in tennis at all.\u201d<\/p>\n Crisis support is available 24\/7 from Lifeline<\/a> (13 11 14)<\/p>\n