A viral video of a man breaking down and crying in his car has drawn widespread praise for its \u2018bravery\u2019 and \u2018vulnerability\u2019, but experts warn it exposes a concerning disconnect in how society actually handles men\u2019s mental health. <\/p>\n
In the clip, a young Sydney-based man by the name of Luh on TikTok spoke for several minutes in his car, while wiping away tears, about his mental health struggles and loneliness.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\u201cI really need someone to talk to,\u201d he began in the video<\/a>, which has since racked up more than five million views.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m so f***ing lonely, and I spend every day pretending that I\u2019m not. I moved to Sydney after a break-up like four years ago and I still haven\u2019t made any friends.\u201d<\/p>\n The \u2018raw\u2019 and \u2018powerful\u2019 footage struck a nerve for many young men alike, who wrote they \u201cfelt the same way\u201d as the Sydneysider.<\/p>\n \u201cThis is the strongest and bravest thing I\u2019ve seen anyone do,\u201d one user commented.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re a braver man than me \u2026 vulnerability will get you everywhere and everything,\u201d said another, while a third added: \u201cThis one video could save a man\u2019s life one day. So powerful and raw\u201d. <\/p>\n Online, we\u2019re seeing an unprecedented cultural shift, with more young men than ever before talking about their mental health, emotional literacy and adopting \u2018therapy-speak\u2019.<\/p>\n But while young men might finally have the vocabulary online, evidence shows that the practical, real-world shifts are still lagging behind.<\/p>\n As we near the end of Men\u2019s Mental Health Month<\/a>, the disturbing reality remains unchanged: nearly half of men are estimated to experience a mental health issue at some point in their lives <\/a>and suicide remains leading cause of death for men aged between 15 and 44.<\/p>\n Despite this, only a small percentage actually reach out for help when they need it.<\/p>\n The pressure to \u2018man up\u2019<\/p>\n Gen Z podcaster and author, Nathan Moss<\/a> believes that the modern expectation and pressure for men to \u2018have it all figured out\u2019 is pushing an entire generation to the brink.<\/p>\n His own experiences navigating the brutal reality of early adulthood prompted him to write the book Sort of Okay, Sort of Not, with the goal of helping other young men who might be lost or struggling.<\/p>\n \u201cThis idea of a man being super masculine, fit, having lots of money, always being okay, and never struggling is unrealistic,\u201d Mr Moss told news.com.au.<\/p>\n He explains that when young men inevitably face uncertainty and struggle to find their purpose, it becomes a \u201cvery dark and scary place\u201d to navigate alone.<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s why all of this \u2018red pill\u2019 and \u2018manosphere\u2019 content has really taken off. It\u2019s given a lot of scared, uncertain, and confused young men an identity that they can latch onto and feel successful and complete,\u201d he explained.<\/p>\n This desperate need to fit a hyper-masculine mould has given way to these \u2018toxic\u2019 subcultures like \u2018looksmaxxing\u2019 trends, which has seen young, impressionable men pursuing dangerous physical modifications to meet impossible aesthetic standards.<\/p>\n Some are even going to extreme lengths like \u201cbone smashing\u201d \u2014 literally hitting their own faces with hard objects in a misguided attempt to chisel and reshape their jawlines.<\/p>\n A 2022 survey by The Man Cave <\/a>found that a quarter of young men saw controversial internet personality Andrew Tate as a role model, while 36 per cent found him relatable.<\/p>\n And, as explored in Louis Theroux\u2019s recent documentary<\/a>, <\/a>Inside the Manosphere, these influential figures are using \u2018seemingly harmless\u2019 topics like health, fitness, and financial success to recruit lonely, purposeless young men who feel society has discarded them.<\/p>\n But, despite the powerful grip of the \u2018manosphere\u2019, Mr Moss says the overwhelming wave of solidarity for the crying man proves that young men, more than ever before, \u201cgenuinely want to incite change\u201d and are moving away from the \u201ctoxic alpha-male narrative\u201d.<\/p>\n So close yet so far<\/p>\n Dr Zac Seidler, one of Australia\u2019s leading male mental health experts, says we\u2019re currently living in an era of \u2018terrifying contradictions\u2019. <\/p>\n \u201cYoung men have more language for mental health than any previous generation, more access to therapy, more cultural permission to struggle openly, and yet we\u2019re seeing escalating rates of loneliness, disconnection, and radicalisation,\u201d Dr Seidler told news.com.au.<\/p>\n He points out that the digital revolution of emotional literacy is completely useless without real-world emotional safety.<\/p>\n \u201cA young man can know the word \u2018shame\u2019 and still have nowhere to take it,\u201d Dr Seidler says, noting that the manosphere remains a formidable threat because, unlike many traditional mental health avenues, it actually listens to these young men.<\/p>\n \u201cIt correctly names young men\u2019s pain, alienation, and social displacement, which is why it\u2019s so effective,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n \u201cA young man who\u2019s lonely, purposeless, and quietly furious doesn\u2019t tend to open a wellbeing app. He goes where he feels seen and activated.\u201d<\/p>\n Dr Seidler argues the true antidote isn\u2019t just telling young men to \u2018open up\u2019, or seeing videos of men talking, or crying, online \u2014 but rather a need to completely rebuild the social architecture around us.<\/p>\n Bridging the gaps<\/p>\n So, what can be done to replace these toxic online echo chambers with genuine connection?<\/p>\n Sydney father Alex Linco, 31, realised the current mental health system was not being utilised by the everyday Aussie man, prompting him to launch Mate Talk <\/a>\u2014 a social support line built specifically to connect people more authentically. <\/p>\n \u201cWhat I\u2019m seeing now is that men are more aware than ever that they\u2019re struggling, which is genuinely progress,\u201d he told news.com.au.<\/p>\n \u201cBut awareness without somewhere safe to actually put it down doesn\u2019t help much. <\/p>\n \u201cThe gap between knowing you\u2019re not okay and doing something about it is still enormous for most men,\u201d noting that Mate Talk is more than just a call line, but rather a \u2018genuine and physical community\u2019 built through footy nights, pub catch-ups, and group runs. <\/p>\n \u201cThe manosphere understands something that a lot of mental health messaging doesn\u2019t: men don\u2019t just want tools and resources, they want to belong somewhere,\u201d Mr Linco explains.<\/p>\n \u201cThe toxic corners of the internet recruits lonely men, so therefore the natural antidote is to ensure that no man is lonely in the first place.\u201d<\/p>\n The consensus from both experts and everyday men is clear: if we want to see true change, society must build practical, real-world scaffolding that can genuinely hold space for this new wave of male vulnerability. <\/p>\n If you or someone you know is experiencing mental health challenges, you can call MensLine Australia <\/a>on 1300 78 99 78 or Lifeline <\/a>on 1300 789 978. <\/p>\n