There is an “urgent” need for parents to discuss the risks of sexual strangulation with their children, says Vanessa Hamilton, a sexual health educator and author of Talking Sex: A Conversation Guide for Parents.<\/p>\n
“This is such a serious issue. The average age of exposure to pornography is 13 years old \u2014 and as young as eight \u2014 in Australia.<\/p>\n
“Our kids need us to help navigate that. They have a human right to accurate information about their bodies and respectful relationships.”<\/p>\n
Ms Hamilton says even younger children can be taught about protecting their necks in a non-sexual context.<\/p>\n
What is sexual strangulation and what term should I use?<\/p>\n
Sexual choking or strangulation is when pressure is applied to the neck to restrict air or blood flow during sex, explains Women’s Health NSW senior project officer Jackie McMillan, who worked on the sexual violence project It Left No Marks.<\/p>\n
Warning after possible death from sexual choking<\/a><\/p>\n Experts are calling for greater education on the risks of strangulation after the death of a Sydney teenage girl, which the ABC understands is related to a suspected sexual choking act.<\/p>\n People may also call it breath play, using a chokehold, being pinned, or suffocated.<\/p>\n Ms McMillan says sexual choking is a high-risk sexual activity<\/a> and there is no safe way to engage in it.<\/p>\n Risks include serious injury, brain injury and death. There can also be legal consequences<\/a>, even if the activity is consensual.<\/p>\n Medical experts and safety advocates prefer the more accurate term “strangulation”, but colloquially it is referred to as “choking”.<\/p>\n Ms McMillan says that “starting with the language of violence” can turn young people away.<\/p>\n “If you talk to young people about sexual strangulation, they think it’s something they’re not doing. They think strangulation is about violence, they think the term is stigmatising and not about sexual expression,” she says.<\/p>\n Chanel Contos, founder and CEO of Teach Us Consent, says using the more recognisable term choking can be a way to open a dialogue, before explaining why strangulation is more accurate.<\/p>\n “Using the correct term helps convey the seriousness involved,” she says.<\/p>\n ‘Providing information is not giving permission’ Chanel Contos founded Teach Us Consent to help young Australians practice affirmative consent and respectful relationships. (ABC News: Callum Flinn )<\/p>\n Young people want practical, honest information about sex, Ms Contos says.<\/p>\n “What the actual physical risks are, how to say no without being shamed for it, and how to raise boundaries with a partner before anything happens, rather than navigating it in the moment.<\/p>\n “Ultimately, the education they’re asking for comes back to consent \u2026 as an ongoing and informed conversation.”<\/p>\n Family and domestic violence support services:Other resources that can help:WIRE:<\/a> 1300 134 130Victims of Crime<\/a> (or your state or territory’s Victims of Crime service): 1800 819 817If you’re in immediate danger, call the police on triple-0<\/p>\n Ms Hamilton says parents needn’t worry that talking about sex will encourage their children to become sexually active.<\/p>\n “Providing information is not giving permission.<\/p>\n “The research shows the more information young people have, the less likely they are to go out and do it.<\/p>\n “When they understand the complexities of what is happening, they make better decisions.”<\/p>\n She says lessons about consent and body safety should begin in infancy, for example using the correct names for body parts and narrating nappy changes<\/a>, and continue throughout a child’s life.<\/p>\n What to say to children about sexual strangulation<\/p>\n Learning about strangulation can begin with young children in the context of play, Ms Hamilton says.<\/p>\n “You can say ‘You never touch anybody’s neck. Never prevent someone from breathing.'”<\/p>\n Ms McMillan says: “We talk about heads and necks being precious in football \u2026 we can talk about the neck being a delicate area.”<\/p>\n![\"Chanel](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/852ade8feb4d3f0f7c81c9a7ffa1c9bc.jpeg\")
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