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Cricket in the Covid era in Sydney. Photograph: James D Morgan\/Getty ImagesEvolving language<\/p>\n
The game\u2019s lexicon of weird phrases and absurd terms remains a cherished part of the experience. A random half-hour listening to unfiltered TMS, all heavy lengths, deep points and backward squares, is to remind you of the game\u2019s essential madness. Yet within this, the language is constantly evolving. Not everyone likes the shift to non-gendered terminology. To some, \u201cbatter\u201d will always be the stuff with which your fish is coated. But to others, it\u2019s a harmless adjustment \u2013 like \u201cdeep third\u201d instead of \u201cthird man\u201d \u2013 that demonstrates a symbolic shift in our thinking. And if folks are still looking to be offended or affronted by something, then save your energies for the new language of cliche: executing plans, anybody?<\/p>\n
Angry celebrations<\/p>\n
Nasser Hussain\u2019s three-fingered rebuke to the press; Denesh Ramdin\u2019s unbearably sad child\u2019s note invoking Viv Richards to \u201ctalk nah\u201d; Virat Kohli erupting at the gods for some imagined slight on his manhood. Cricketers today seem trapped in a sonic dichotomy, simultaneously \u201cblocking out the noise\u201d while at the same time loudly \u201csilencing the doubters\u201d. It\u2019s all good theatre, of course, and at least it shows they care.<\/p>\n
Virat Kohli celebrates after scoring a century for India against South Africa in 2023. Photograph: Dibyangshu Sarkar\/AFP\/Getty ImagesAnd 10 things we\u2019ve lost this century \u2026The doosra<\/p>\n
It came, it went the other way, it cleared off. For a moment there, the doosra (\u201cother one\u201d in Urdu) looked like it would conquer the world, until it became clear that in order to bowl it effectively you needed to be a physical freak or a cheat. Cricket Australia discouraged the coaching of it, the game closed ranks, and Alex Loudon went to work in the City.<\/p>\n
Silly-point<\/p>\n
In retrospect, Ricky Ponting spitting blood and instructing Matt Prior to fuck off after getting mashed in the mush in 2009 was the moment that cricket\u2019s most nominatively determinist position finally jumped the shark. Silly then, even sillier now.<\/p>\n
The follow-on<\/p>\n
It used to consume us. Will they or won\u2019t they? What happens if they fail to avoid the thing? Then VVS Laxman and Rahul Dravid came along, butchered it to death under the Kolkata sun, and we all came to realise that it\u2019s not all it\u2019s cracked up to be. It died its final death at Wellington three years ago when Ben Stokes, high on his own supply and targeting a bonus 18 holes, stuck them in again and lost the game by a run.<\/p>\n
Six-Test series<\/p>\n
Most teams don\u2019t get that in a year these days.<\/p>\n
Gaspers, snouts, javelins, darts. It seems they have gone right out of fashion. Just as well that county cricketers are unconcerned with trends, or indeed the wider world at all, and thus you will find many of its number persisting with a crafty blast behind the sheds. But sponsorship? Ploughing cash and cartons into cricket\u2019s yellow-fingered palms? Stubbed out. Extinguished. Vale, the John Player. Farewell, the B&H. These days it\u2019s all investment banks, offshore betting and peanut butter. Progress, eh.<\/p>\n
Rest days<\/p>\n
Back then, most Test matches had a rest day. Until the mid-1990s, at least in England, we were still kicking back on Sundays. (Not everywhere, you understand. Some grounds needed the money of a Sunday crowd. But Lord\u2019s, bless it, persisted until the very last.) Slowly it was phased out, and nowadays it occurs only if a match clashes with, say, a country\u2019s election day, as with Sri Lanka v New Zealand a couple of years ago. Fact of the day: Sanjay Manjrekar has an album called Rest Day<\/a>. Recorded in his prime. Another time, another time.<\/p>\n Umpires with quirks<\/p>\n With due respect to the great Marais Erasmus, a jolly soul who evidently spends much of his job quietly recalling the best farts he did in school, there is a deep absence of umpires with a bit about them, not least since Rudi \u201cSlow Death\u201d Koertzen and \u201cBig\u201d Steve Bucknor downed their fingers in the late 2000s. Where is Billy\u2019s busted digit when you need it? Dave Shep\u2019s bucolic carry-on? Blame technology.<\/p>\n The Waca<\/p>\n An arid desert of a pitch. Outfields readying for wildfires. Floodlights lurking like Ted Hughes\u2019s Iron Man bearing down on hunks of crumbling concrete stained with the blood of the fallen. This is Perth: where English cricket goes to die<\/a>. The Waca is still there, but these days resting; now it\u2019s the Optus \u2013 superficially similar, but with a sheen of respectability, of corporatist polish. The viewing experience is cleaner, safer; there\u2019s even such a thing as shade. But what is Test cricket in Perth if not a savage scrap with the elements?<\/p>\n Gravy and Mayfield<\/p>\n If you don\u2019t know the legend of Gravy and Mayfield, then you may never understand West Indies cricket. A pair of Antiguan drag queens, literally gyrating off the rafters at the old Rec in downtown St John\u2019s, enacting scenes of pantomime villainy for the masses as Chickie\u2019s Disco takes care of the tunes and the boys in the middle bash the ball to oblivion. This used to be Test cricket in the West Indies.<\/p>\n RabbitsThe new issue of Wisden Cricket Monthly.<\/p>\n Wither, dear reader, another cherished delicacy, wolfed down the engorged gullet of dull modernity. Chaps these days are not allowed to be useless batters. They must instead offer \u201cvalue\u201d, be \u201crounded\u201d, \u201cmultifaceted\u201d cricketers. No longer is there virtue in turning up seven minutes after the start with your flannels in a rucksack, sleeping through the first innings and winning the game in the gloaming with a flash of flight and guile. Modern life is indeed rubbish.<\/p>\n Read the full list of 100 changes in the new issue of Wisden Cricket Monthly<\/a>. Alternatively, if you would like to read digitally, take out a six-month subscription for just \u00a36<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"The ball that changed cricket Unblessed with much pace, staying agile lest they get left behind, the game\u2019s…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":901640,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[564],"tags":[64,63,740,85],"class_list":["post-901639","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-cricket","tag-au","tag-australia","tag-cricket","tag-sports"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/901639","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=901639"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/901639\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/901640"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=901639"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=901639"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/au\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=901639"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}