Luckily, I got a second chance

First Person columns are personal stories and experiences from kids written in their own words. For more information and to learn how to submit your own piece, scroll to the bottom of the page. 

Adults say “dream big.” 

Sometimes that means racing up three flights of stairs in slippery tap shoes, clutching a half-eaten snack and hoping I can finish it before I’m called back on stage. 

One minute I’m leaping across the stage, the next I’m scrambling into my next costume and hoping my crackers with cheese don’t fall on the floor.

My parents, teachers and even my friends’ parents say things like “follow your passions!” and “try new things!” 

But they also say “relax, just be a kid!” 

I love performing, but sometimes things don’t go as planned. 

At 10, I’ve learned what I do takes courage and it’s OK if something doesn’t go my way. 

You just got to keep going.

How am I supposed to chase my dreams and chill out at the same time? 

Personally, I think being a kid in the performing arts should come with a calendar app, unlimited snacks and a personal assistant who always knows where my left tap shoe is. 

(Good news I have one; she prefers to be called Mom.)

I started dancing when I was three.

A smiling girl in a costume.

Emily started dancing when she was three, and performed in her first competitive dance recital when she was six, pictured here. (Image submitted by Liat Brudnoy)

Then came acting classes, piano lessons and, most recently, vocal training. 

I’d seen so many videos of celebrities hitting amazing high notes, and I have a deep voice, so I really wanted to be able to sing higher.

My family and I went to a production of Annie a year ago in Stratford, Ontario. I loved everything about it. 

I thought to myself, “I need to be in a movie. I need to sing. I need to be in productions.”

Living the ups and downs

The best moments aren’t always on stage. 

They’re the look of pure joy on mom’s face after the curtains fall. 

They’re the rare compliment from my teenage brother: “Not bad… you actually looked pretty good up there.” 

They’re piling into the car with my family after the show, still buzzing, and heading out for a meal where I feel like the star of the table. 

A boy and girl sit in a booth eating ice cream.

Emily’s family tradition is to go out for a meal after dance competitions and recitals, sometimes still in her costume. (Image submitted by Liat Brudnoy)

But chasing big dreams doesn’t always feel sparkly. Sometimes it feels heavy. 

I realized that this past December at a holiday concert.

I was meant to sing my first full on stage vocal solo. 

I was also preparing a piano piece, getting ready for the competitive dance season and finishing rehearsals for a musical put on by young artists. 

It was exciting, and … a lot. I felt nervous.

I stood under the lights, hands on the mic stand, and gave a thumbs-up for the music. This was my moment. I was going to sing New Day Will Rise. 

And then the wrong backing track started.

Not slightly wrong. Completely unrecognizable. 

A girl stands holding a microphone, singing.

Emily started vocal training in the past year after seeing a production of the musical Annie. (Image submitted by Liat Brudnoy)

Sometimes things don’t go as planned

My brain went blank. My cheeks burned. 

“That’s not my song,” I thought. 

I could see my parents in the front row looking confused. 

I felt embarrassed.  

Eventually the music stopped and I walked off stage.

I didn’t sing my song. 

It felt like my hard work had slipped right out of my hands.

When I got home, I sang the song for myself, without a mic or music. 

I thought, “This is really good. It’s OK, because I know I could have done it.”

Mom hugged me and told me it wasn’t my fault. 

She asked if I wanted to slow down. For a moment I pictured hiding under a blanket and worrying only about homework, like my school friends. 

I was tempted, but I said no, I’m going to keep going. 

A girl holds a basketball smiling, running away from a boy whose hand is reached out.

In addition to performing, Emily’s older brother Liam has also gotten her into sports, such as basketball. (Image submitted by Liat Brudnoy)

I felt determined. 

I didn’t want one uncomfortable moment to decide my story. 

Mom told me that the song I had chosen — New Day Will Rise — is a promise that today doesn’t have to get the final word. 

A couple weeks later, I sang this same song at my school assembly. I felt nervous and my heart thumped, but I did it. 

Now I’m still taking vocal lessons and looking forward to the Arcadia Academy of Music MusicFest in Brampton, Ontario, where I’ll get another chance at a vocal solo this summer. 

I’m 10 and I’m still figuring this out. 

Some days are messy and magical at once with costumes, sequence, nerves and snacks tangled together. 

And even when things don’t go as planned, a new day will rise. 

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The column has a clear focus, is backed up by personal experiences and facts, is tied to something happening in the news and will be of interest to other kids in Canada.
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