Knicks in five? More like Fangies in three! Just kidding, but seeing Angela’s team sweep Shamea’s at the Bailey Bowl basketball tournament was almost as satisfying as knowing Charles got to witness his former team’s historic win in person. Yes, she won the very tournament she organized herself, but I’ll still give it to her. However, we do have to address the elephant in the room: What is up with Angela’s storyline with her daughter?
I appreciate Angela’s eagerness to open up about her very real family issues; however, tonight’s episode raised some questions I’m not sure she’s ready to confront head-on. Objectively, there seem to be two separate sources of friction: Ahmauri explaining to her younger siblings that her “best friend” is really her wife, and Ahmauri and Angela’s individual relationship as mother and daughter. As they try to make headway on camera, things get murky. It’s obvious these two issues are somehow correlated, yet neither woman is willing to identify the specific connection. I wish they would, though! I’m sure these conversations surrounding sexuality are happening in a lot of households as times change. That willingness to film hard conversations is part of why we tune into The Real Housewives.
From Ahmauri’s point of view, her hesitance to tell her siblings comes from her belief that heterosexuality is the “norm,” and she admits she would be more comfortable telling them if she had a husband instead. That alone is eyebrow-raising. Whether this line of thinking stems from how she was raised or from an internalization of the world’s prejudice isn’t clear. But it also implies that Angela’s household isn’t necessarily one where queerness is openly explained to the little ones; thus the onus is on Ahmauri to start those conversations. Ahmauri even says that Angela is scared she will “hurt the kids.” It is important to note that Ahmauri took to Twitter to defend her mom against accusations of homophobia. But just because Angela supported her daughter coming out doesn’t mean there might not be an overall taboo or stigma around the conversation as a family — Ahmauri herself included, based on that confessional — which is what I believe Ahmauri is tiptoeing around.
When Ahmauri tries to explain to Angela why she initially hid her marriage from her, Angela cuts her off, prompting Ahmauri to explain that she doesn’t feel like her mom listens to her and is “impossible to talk to.” When they meet with Angela’s therapist together, instead of discussing coming out to Ahmauri’s younger siblings, they focus on Angela’s boundaries and how they can communicate better before the scene cuts to them holding hands at the end of the session. There’s no further explanation as to whether these boundaries relate specifically to Ahmauri’s marriage or to something else entirely. Whatever the case, I think deep down Ahmauri knows that having the courage to have these conversations, no matter how clunky or confusing it may be, is one step toward reducing the stigma she discussed in her confessional.
As Angela deals with the ups and downs of her relationship with her daughter, Porsha marks the end of an era as she gets ready to sell Porsha’s Palace. I’m sure the hallways will forever whisper the echoes of many a kiki, malapropism, and swishing GoNaked wig. Porsha’s grown a lot since she purchased the property when she was getting back on her feet financially following her divorce from Kordell. Now, she’s speaking like a true businesswoman as she discusses the cost-benefit analysis of selling her old property and taking out equity on the mansion. I’m proud of her — I’m the first person to make a joke about how dumb she is or that she’s living in Simon’s house, but she’s made some really smart moves while building a life for herself and her child.
Even Simon ending sponsorship of Porsha’s Nigerian residency (he’s so dramatic and corny) doesn’t get under her skin, because she sees it as a business opportunity. Porsha says whenever Simon pulls one of his stunts, GoNaked sales skyrocket. And now that she and Drew are on good terms, she wants to spread the wealth, offering Drew her own GoNaked wig line. Unlike last year, the collaboration and photoshoot are approved by both parties, proving how far the two have come. Kelli should re-evaluate her beef with Porsha, because she could use a little extra change in her pocket, too, now that we’ve seen just how dire her financial situation is. Okay, “dire” is a bit of an exaggeration when she’s still living a pretty privileged life, but according to her financial advisor, things aren’t looking good for maintaining the lifestyle she’s accustomed to. Kelli needs to take her realtor’s tough love that she’s going to have to tighten up her purse strings and “suffer for a little while, boo.”
Meanwhile, K. Michelle has a follow-up with her doctor now that she’s healed from the last procedure. She tells him that to “complete her journey,” she now wants a lift and a smaller “fitness” booty. Just when I think the doctor is going to talk her off the ledge — he does at least warn against getting another implant — he encourages her to get a fat transfer. The kicker is that, since K. Michelle doesn’t have enough excess fat to graft, her doctor recommends using donated, lab-sterilized human fat. Of course I had to Google this, and upon further research, the specific brand of human fat (am I the first in my bloodline to say such a phrase?) he’s talking about comes from cadavers. K. is definitely interested. It sounds like a dystopian sci-fi concept where she could become possessed by the spirit of the deceased… although what’s one more voice in her head?
We get a great dose of personal storylines in tonight’s episode, but I loved seeing the women come together for Cynthia’s second Bailey Bowl. Cynthia collaborates with Angela to turn this year’s iteration into a basketball tournament, Maggie Madness, to memorialize Angela’s late mother. The original Bailey Bowl was definitely more entertaining (nothing will beat Kandi bucking out her chest and having Olympians on her team, or Nene storming away from Marlo), but they did their best. Charles brings his dry humor — saying Angela would fall over if she had size six feet was so good — and NBA expertise as referee, while Cynthia and Angela provide the shade. It wouldn’t be a Cynthia Bailey game without some intentional pot-stirring, so of course she and Angela get their digs in while they name the teams. Porsha and team GoNaked are the only ones left unscathed as the duo gives their castmates’ teams messy monikers. Pinky’s team is “Chatty Patty,” Phaedra’s is “The Godfather,” Kelli’s is “Minion,” Drew’s is “Delulu,” and Shamea’s is “Sasquatch.” K.’s is “Blind Opposition,” as a nod to her paranoia, but she hilariously scribbles over it, writing “Team Only Opps in Opportunity.”
Like art imitating life, the tournament dwindles to the two with the most friction at the moment: Team Fangie versus Team Sasquatch. Angela wins, taking home the first championship win for the Oakley home. Predictably, Shamea is a sore loser, calling her opponent “ole stank ass,” and Angela is cocky, keeping the offense going off the court. They basically have the same conversation as at the failed dinner, arguing over who started attacking the other’s marriage first. Angela lays out her timeline, naming each moment Shamea came for her so far, including Shamea saying on a podcast that Angela made up the whole Charles-with-another-woman storyline herself. Shamea doesn’t want to rehash the past, as she’s still hung up on Angela insinuating that she’s sleeping with the Hawks players, which is news to the rest of the group, who emit peanut-gallery gasps.
I’m realizing Shamea doesn’t truly know how to read, in the RHOA sense of the term, and she instead makes outdated mean-girl jabs. This time, she says Angela is only relevant because she slept with and then married an NBA player. Okay, and? Did she forget what show they’re filming? Like Phaedra said, “It’s usually how it works, though.” Angela then draws a line in the sand, saying that although her issues with Shamea started as a result of the Shamea-vs.-Porsha proxy wars, now it’s personal. Drew pipes up, saying she’s in the same situation, agreeing that Shamea’s pattern of behavior is off-putting. Right when Shamea can take a breath after fighting both Drew and Angela, here comes Pinky, asking her if she’s okay with K., alluding to the cryptic conversation in the club about K.’s loyalty. Shamea had no K. Michelle felt a way about what happened, let alone that Pinky was aware. Pinky doesn’t fully spill the beans, just messily says, “I felt an energy.” I’m not mad at her; I think she’s poking the bear to see what will happen. K. Michelle shuts her down, preferring to address it with Shamea in private, as we see will happen next week.
They end the event with a group hug and by expressing anticipation for Phaedra and Porsha’s upcoming trip to Scotland, but Shamea isn’t feeling it. Through tears, Shamea says in her confessional, “I don’t even know what I did wrong,” despite Drew and Angela’s multiple attempts at trying to talk things out. Then, she twists it into the other women wanting to ice her out of the show and openly questions if she still wants to be a part of it. We’ll see if she survives the confrontations coming for her in Scotland.
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