{"id":214177,"date":"2025-10-15T06:20:27","date_gmt":"2025-10-15T06:20:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/214177\/"},"modified":"2025-10-15T06:20:27","modified_gmt":"2025-10-15T06:20:27","slug":"rui-en-felt-terrified-every-minute-due-to-depression-slept-only-1-to-4-hours-a-night","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/214177\/","title":{"rendered":"Rui En felt ‘terrified every minute’ due to depression, slept only 1 to 4 hours a night"},"content":{"rendered":"

Benson Ang
The Straits Times<\/a>
Oct 12, 2025<\/p>\n

Ahead of World Mental Health Day on Oct 10, Singaporean actress Rui En shared that she suffered from depression in the first half of 2024.<\/p>\n

In an article in Chinese-language daily Lianhe Zaobao on Oct 8, the 44-year-old recalled sleeping only one to four hours a night during that dark period, which she has since emerged from.<\/p>\n

She said: “When I woke up, I would feel hopeless and helpless. It was a terrifying feeling.”<\/p>\n

Rui En, whose last Mediacorp drama was the Channel 8 series Oppa, Saranghae! (2023), said she started sharing mental health-related content on social media around the end of 2024, such as a video about how some people felt low and lonely around the holiday season.<\/p>\n

At that time, she did not state that she had suffered from depression as she felt hesitant to do so.<\/p>\n

“I did not want to tell everyone right away. I was a little worried about their reaction,” she said. “I had never shown such a vulnerable side of myself before, so I was not used to it. In the past, I built up a very high wall of protection, and sharing something so private made me feel worried and scared. I felt very naked.”<\/p>\n

She detailed to Lianhe Zaobao how several events in the past five years caught her off guard, such as the death of her cat in 2020, her father having a heart attack in New Zealand in 2021, and her leaving her agency Artiste Networks in 2021.<\/p>\n

“There were so many ups and downs during that period, and I tried my best to resolve and deal with them, but some things are beyond your control,” she said.<\/p>\n

The local star also felt uneasy with the decrease in filming output at the time, which made her question her identity. She said: “Being an actor is my first and only job. At that time, a question suddenly popped up in my mind – ‘If you are not an artiste, who are you?'”<\/p>\n

This was a question she could not answer. She elaborated: “The entertainment industry is like a bubble to me. Actors are protected. We are inside and may know nothing about what is going on outside. So, when I have to face the outside world, it is very terrifying.<\/p>\n

“As for the question of ‘who am I’, I didn’t have an answer, which was also the main reason for my depression.”<\/p>\n

It took about half a year from the time she realised she was depressed to the time she “walked out of it”, she said. It is not known if she sought professional treatment or took medication.<\/p>\n

During that period, she suffered from insomnia and a poor appetite. She told Lianhe Zaobao: “I felt terrified every minute, and my chest felt tight and painful.”<\/p>\n

In July 2024, Rui En, who is a Christian, signed up for Bible school “under duress”.<\/p>\n

In an Oct 5 Instagram post, she wrote: “I was sinking under the weight of depression and I was desperate.<\/p>\n

“A year later, after being to hell and back, I can tell you that recovery and healing is possible with God. Not overnight, but slowly. Get help. Put one foot in front of the other. Even when it hurts just to breathe. One day, that tightness in your chest will ease and light will start shining in through the cracks in the tunnel.”<\/p>\n

She told Lianhe Zaobao: “I am so grateful to have recovered within six months. Because I understand how it feels and how hard it is, I want to promote mental health awareness and let those who are going through it know they are not alone.”<\/p>\n

She first openly admitted to suffering from depression in an interview with local content creator Aiken Chia filmed in March.<\/p>\n

In June, she uploaded a video on Instagram with the caption “The baby steps I took to beat depression”, where she recounted things she did to get out of feeling depressed, such as running and going to the gym.<\/p>\n

She said in the clip: “It is okay to have to speak to a professional… It is okay to be in therapy.”<\/p>\n

She continued producing videos about mental health, interviewing relevant professionals and celebrities. For example, she asked counsellor Abigail Lee, founder of local counselling centre Healing Hearts Centre, some general questions on anxiety, in a video uploaded to Instagram in July.<\/p>\n

She told Lianhe Zaobao: “Some netizens read my posts and left comments or private messages thanking me, saying I made them feel less alone. This moved me to tears because I could relate to them.”<\/p>\n

In July, she started a TikTok account, something she resisted for a long time as she feared a harsh audience, but her experience on the platform turned out to be “not as bad” as she imagined.<\/p>\n

Nowadays, Rui En – who won Best Actress twice at the Star Awards and co-sang the 2005 National Day Parade theme song Reach Out For The Skies – chooses to look at her acting hiatus positively.<\/p>\n

She said: “The slower pace of work gives me some breathing space, and I can learn new things and see the outside world.”<\/p>\n

She is also aiming to find a sense of identity outside her industry. She asked: “When I am gone, how will people remember me? As a skilled actor? As a singer who sang patriotic songs? I may have done many things, but those are not enough for me. I hope I can still help others.”<\/p>\n

HelplinesMental well-beingNational helpline: 1771 (24 hours) \/ 6669-1771 (via WhatsApp)Samaritans of Singapore: 1-767 (24 hours) \/ 9151-1767 (24 hours CareText via WhatsApp)Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019Silver Ribbon Singapore: 6386-1928Chat, Centre of Excellence for Youth Mental Health: 6493-6500\/1Women’s Helpline (Aware): 1800-777-5555 (weekdays, 10am to 6pm)The Seniors Helpline: 1800-555-5555 (weekdays, 9am to 5pm)Tinkle Friend (for primary school-age children): 1800-2744-788CounsellingTouchline (Counselling): 1800-377-2252Touch Care Line (for caregivers): 6804-6555Counselling and Care Centre: 6536-6366We Care Community Services: 3165-8017Shan You Counselling Centre: 6741-9293Clarity Singapore: 6757-7990Online resourcesGet more of Stomp’s latest updates by following us on:<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Benson AngThe Straits TimesOct 12, 2025 Ahead of World Mental Health Day on Oct 10, Singaporean actress Rui…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":214178,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[49,48,3332,84,66894,393,394,101888],"class_list":{"0":"post-214177","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-mental-health","8":"tag-ca","9":"tag-canada","10":"tag-celebrity","11":"tag-health","12":"tag-illness","13":"tag-mental-health","14":"tag-mentalhealth","15":"tag-rui-en"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/214177","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=214177"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/214177\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/214178"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=214177"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=214177"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=214177"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}