{"id":334924,"date":"2025-12-09T16:51:07","date_gmt":"2025-12-09T16:51:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/334924\/"},"modified":"2025-12-09T16:51:07","modified_gmt":"2025-12-09T16:51:07","slug":"jon-stewart-on-fifas-peace-prize-an-entirely-fictitious-golden-butt-plug-late-night-tv-roundup","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/334924\/","title":{"rendered":"Jon Stewart on Fifa\u2019s peace prize: \u2018An entirely fictitious golden butt plug\u2019 | Late-night TV roundup"},"content":{"rendered":"

Late-night hosts mocked Donald Trump<\/a> for gleefully accepting the inaugural Fifa peace prize ahead<\/a> of the World Cup in the US.<\/p>\n

Jon Stewart<\/p>\n

On the daily show on Monday evening Jon Stewart<\/a> roasted Donald Trump for accepting the inaugural Fifa peace prize at the World Cup draw on Friday. \u201cOh my God, he won the prize specifically created to appease him!\u201d he joked. \u201cThe Fifa appease prize!<\/p>\n<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know if you guys got a good look at the trophy, but come on,\u201d he laughed before a photo of the trophy, sculpted to appear as though several hands rising from below cupped the world.<\/p>\n

\u201cI think its design somewhat reflects, in all likelihood, how it was conceived. I take you to that meeting now …\u201d Stewart continued, breaking into an impression of a Fifa employee: \u201cWhy do we gotta invent some prize just to satisfy some fragile egomaniac? Trump is so needy. It\u2019s like the world always has to reach out and stroke his balls.\u201d<\/p>\n

The prize ceremony included not only the trophy but a medal, which Trump immediately put around his own neck. \u201cHe\u2019s so thirsty he\u2019s not even going to bag it,\u201d Stewart laughed. \u201cHe\u2019s like, \u2018No, I\u2019ll just wear it out of the store, no worries.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u201cThe craziest part wasn\u2019t necessarily Donald Trump being awarded an entirely fictitious golden butt plug,\u201d he added. \u201cIt was the cognitive dissonance of flipping over to the news channels, post-peace ceremony.\u201d The host played a series of clips from the Trump administration claiming they were \u201cramping up the pressure\u201d on the Venezuelan president, Nicol\u00e1s Maduro, or \u201con the brink of war with Venezuela\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cAmerica\u2019s new foreign policy is basically this: don\u2019t kill people there [the Middle East]; kill them over here [South America], in your own time zone,\u201d he mused. \u201cIt\u2019s classic advice: shit where you eat.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s the new Trump doctrine. It\u2019s not in any way about stable democracies. It\u2019s about spheres of influence,\u201d he concluded. \u201cRussia can have their sphere of influence, including Ukraine. China can have theirs, and probably Taiwan, and we get South America. America is no longer the shining city on the hill. It is merely just one of the five crime families, splitting up the territories.\u201d<\/p>\n

Jimmy Kimmel<\/p>\n

Jimmy Kimmel<\/a> also poked at Donald Trump for his award-filled weekend, including a hosting stint at the Kennedy Center Honors \u2013 the first held since Trump\u2019s hostile takeover of the formerly non-partisan performance venue and institution.<\/p>\n

While hosting, Trump took a swipe at Kimmel, claiming he was an inferior host \u2013 \u201cIf I can\u2019t beat out Jimmy Kimmel<\/a> in terms of talent, then I don\u2019t think I should be president.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think I\u2019ve ever agreed with anything more than that,\u201d Kimmel joked. \u201cDo you think he even knows that I\u2019ve never hosted the Kennedy Center Honors? Maybe he\u2019s confusing me with Queen Latifah? And as far as this who has more talent thing goes, it seems like he\u2019s challenging me to a contest and if so, I\u2019m open to it. Let\u2019s do it. Let\u2019s have a talent competition. I\u2019ll come on, I\u2019ll tell a few jokes, I\u2019ll draw something, I\u2019ll clarinet. And he can play golf, spank a porn star and ruin a country.\u201d<\/p>\n

Kimmel also mocked the Fifa peace prize, \u201cwhich is like if Nascar started handing out Peabody awards. It means nothing.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe couldn\u2019t hand out all those Kennedy Center medals without getting one himself,\u201d he mused. \u201cYou know how when you bring a birthday present to an eight-year-old and you have to bring another one for his five-year-old brother? This is basically that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nevertheless, Trump proclaimed the award to be \u201cone of the greatest honors of his life\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cPutting a made-up medal around your neck and bragging about it is like masturbating and telling your friend you got laid this weekend,\u201d Kimmel quipped. \u201cEveryone, even his family, knows this is a BS prize designed to keep him from screwing up the World Cup, except for him. It\u2019s so deeply pathetic, it almost makes me feel bad for him.\u201d<\/p>\n

Seth Meyers<\/p>\n

\u201cEveryone knows how easily Trump is flattered by gifts and fake awards, and that dynamic has only become more glaring in his second term,\u201d said Seth Meyers<\/a> on Late Night.<\/p>\n

He recalled how South Korea gave him a crown and the Olympic organizing committee gave him medals, but \u201cnothing will ever top what Fifa did on Friday\u201d with the inaugural peace prize.<\/p>\n

\u201cFirst of all, is there anything sadder than putting a medal on yourself? It\u2019s like putting the candles in your own birthday cake,\u201d Meyers laughed. \u201cI guess we shouldn\u2019t be surprised that the guy who starts walking the stage before they announce the winner also can\u2019t wait to wear his shiny new toy.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe gambit worked exactly as planned,\u201d he continued, as \u201cTrump was so easily swayed by the special trophy from Fifa that within minutes, the man who once called himself America First was saying we should rename American football because soccer is the real football.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Trump said on stage to the Fifa president, Gianni Infantino, \u201cThis is real football \u2026 we have to come up with another name for the American stuff.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThey gave him one fake peace prize and he\u2019s already turning on the quintessential American sport and siding with Europe,\u201d said Meyers. \u201cTo win Trump back, the NFL is gonna have to one-up Fifa with the first inaugural NFL Lifetime Achievement Genius Prize Emmy Oscar Golden Globe Tony Michigan Man of the Year Award or Whatever.\u201d<\/p>\n

Stephen Colbert<\/p>\n

\u201cI hope you had a fun weekend, but there is no way you had more fun than Donald Trump,\u201d said Stephen Colbert<\/a> on the Late Show, \u201cbecause he is that girl from the office who celebrates her birthday month, and it\u2019s going to be four years long.\u201d<\/p>\n

Colbert first took a swipe at Trump for saying, during his Kennedy Center Honors hosting duties, \u201cif I can\u2019t beat out Jimmy Kimmel in terms of talent, then I don\u2019t think I should be president.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t, and you shouldn\u2019t,\u201d Colbert responded. \u201cAlso just a quick brain check for grandpa pudding skull \u2013 I called him, and Jimmy Kimmel has never hosted the Kennedy Center Honors. But here\u2019s the thing: I did, the three years leading up to Trump becoming president.\u201d<\/p>\n

In other news, \u201cafter years of campaigning unsuccessfully for the Nobel peace prize,\u201d Trump won the inaugural Fifa peace prize. \u201cMight seem like an odd combination, but I think it\u2019s appropriate, because when you think peaceful, you think soccer fans,\u201d Colbert joked. \u201cAnd later that day, Trump also received the Hooters National Book Award.<\/p>\n

\u201cCall me a boomer, but these participation trophies have gone too far!\u201d he exclaimed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Late-night hosts mocked Donald Trump for gleefully accepting the inaugural Fifa peace prize ahead of the World Cup…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":334925,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[440],"tags":[49,48,561,82],"class_list":{"0":"post-334924","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-soccer","8":"tag-ca","9":"tag-canada","10":"tag-soccer","11":"tag-sports"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/334924","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=334924"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/334924\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/334925"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=334924"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=334924"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=334924"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}