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The Traitors<\/a><\/p>\n Cut the Head Off the Snake<\/p>\n \n Season 4<\/p>\n Episode 4\n <\/p>\n \n Editor\u2019s Rating<\/p>\n 3 stars<\/p>\n ***\n <\/p>\n \n Even with the Housewives\u2019 alliance being tested, it\u2019s the Faithfuls who are their own worst enemies. With four celebrities blindfolded and tied to trees in the woods of Scotland, our Traitors had a tough decision to make. Would they kill Ron, Eric, Caroline, or Kristen? Breakfast is, of course, the only place to learn the answer to that question. As our potential victims arrive one by one, Mon\u00e9t wisely asks each of them about their experiences to see if they reveal any inconsistencies that suggest one is really a Traitor. What we know, that Mon\u00e9t doesn\u2019t, is that Lisa Rinna is the one under attack with this little test.<\/p>\n First to testify is Ron, who gives a detailed account and says it sounded as though there were three Traitors, including someone with very light footsteps. \u201cThe lightest, tiniest little bird that I know \u2026 is Maura,\u201d he says in his confessional, continuing his streak of being confidently wrong. Lisa is next, so luckily she has only one story to match \u2014 and she does a pretty good job. Although she\u2019s visibly nervous, she doesn\u2019t fall for Mon\u00e9t\u2019s trap and correctly describes the henchman\u2019s mask. That said, she does get a little needlessly detailed, even claiming the tree they\u2019d tied her to was a maple, and she says she was freed by an ax, which Johnny notes isn\u2019t something Ron mentioned.<\/p>\n As for Eric, he says he thinks there were maybe two Traitors and, in his confessional, adds that he\u2019s 99 percent sure he heard a laugh but he\u2019s not ready to share whose. Our final survivor is Kristen, meaning that, sadly, Caroline was killed. \u201cRinna, you bitch,\u201d we see her say upon facing her killers. \u201cToo bad, Caroline. Back to Dubai you go,\u201d Lisa replies without a shred of mercy. Caroline thought the Housewives would have each other\u2019s back, but that very notion is the reason she\u2019s going. Everybody expects Housewives to look out for Housewives, so killing Caroline takes a little heat off Lisa and Candiace.<\/p>\n Thankfully, during all this, Michael (who looks as if his veins are filled with sour cream instead of blood) has taken everybody\u2019s advice and decided to shut the hell up for once. Nonetheless, Tiffany still thinks he\u2019s a Traitor, along with Yam Yam (who suspiciously referred to the woods killing as a \u201cceremony\u201d at the table) and Ron (who\u2019s still a suspect after taking out Porsha and being friendly with Donna). But as Tiffany makes that case around the castle, Colton is throwing her name out there \u2014 saying she has been trying to control the entire game, which is a red flag.<\/p>\n But before any banishing can happen, they have a mission to get through, led by Alan, who\u2019s dressed like a scarecrow going to prom. They have to set ablaze ten effigies with spears, and for each one they light up, they get to pick someone whose shield will also burn. This, of course, seems risky given Alan\u2019s straw-lined blazer, but I\u2019m sure production made his safety a priority. After all, without him, who would bring Lala to the set?<\/p>\n Michael (whom an embalmer would look at and say, \u201cOh, we did this one already\u201d) wastes no time misunderstanding the challenge, grabbing a corn doll, rather than the spears the dolls are meant to lead them to, on account of being an idiot. Meanwhile, Tiffany is furious that her shield went up in flames, so she battle-cried Mon\u00e9t\u2019s name as she burned hers as revenge. And speaking of Mon\u00e9t, she confided to Candiace that she\u2019s suspicious of Lisa, and she took that info straight to her fellow Traitor. To cap things off, Yam Yam\u2019s shield was the last to burn, upon which he burst into tears. I love Yam Yam, but please be serious for two seconds. So he, Ron, Tiffany, Mon\u00e9t, Tara, Stephen, Lisa, Maura, Johnny, and Michael (who looks like Gargamel\u2019s less attractive brother) are left without shields.<\/p>\n But before one gets the ax at the Traitors\u2019 hands, we have a Round Table to get through, and the names on everybody\u2019s lips seem to be Tiffany\u2019s and Ron\u2019s, but there doesn\u2019t seem to be all that much consensus. \u201cTiffany, you\u2019re the Traitor that I\u2019m going after tonight,\u201d Colton says in his little off-the-shoulder sweater, catching her off guard. But even the element of surprise can\u2019t help Colton here. He may be a mastermind at putting tracking devices on his ex\u2019s car<\/a>, but when it comes to gameplay, he\u2019s no match for Tiffany. He struggles to hold his own, especially because his main evidence is that she strategizes too much, but I did enjoy his asking how to spell her name for the vote. I enjoyed her response even more: \u201cT-i-f-f-a-n-y, like the company.\u201d<\/p>\n Tiffany does think several steps ahead, as Colton alleges, but it\u2019s not because she\u2019s a good Traitor; it\u2019s because she\u2019s a good game player. The problem with thinking several steps ahead, though, is that she brings not one name but three to the Round Table, alleging that Ron, Yam Yam, and Michael (whose liver spots have sun damage) are all Traitors. As a result, her energy is unfocused and her argument is split among the three of them rather than concentrated on one person to take out.<\/p>\n Amid this back-and-forth, Maura somehow gets a word in and asks Ron why he has been saying her name. He tells them all about the very light footsteps he heard when he was tied to the tree, but Maura shuts him down with ease. That\u2019s not all that was heard in the woods, though, and Eric uses this as an opportunity to finally tell everyone about the laugh: \u201cI am 99 percent sure that laugh was you, Tiffany.\u201d Well, now I\u2019m the one laughing. But if Eric heard it, he would clearly have no idea it was me. And let\u2019s be real \u2014 Tiffany would never be dumb enough to laugh.<\/p>\n Even with Candiace trying to defend Tiffany, the laugh was the last nail in her coffin and she was banished from the castle in a massive loss for the show. \u201cYou all should be proud of yourselves because you have proved that you get what you deserve. You all didn\u2019t deserve me because I am a Faithful,\u201d Tiffany says as she exits. A great fake-out that leaves Colton and Eric shocked and rightfully distressed.<\/p>\n Back in the turret, our actual Traitors have eight people to choose from. But since they want to keep the suspicious Ron, Yam Yam, and (unfortunately) Michael around, that leaves them to choose from Johnny, Tara, Maura, Stephen, and Mon\u00e9t. Will they split up our figure-skating pair? Give Maura an Irish exit? Or kill off Stephen before he\u2019s even had a chance to speak this whole season? It\u2019s too early to say for sure, but things don\u2019t look particularly good for Mon\u00e9t given that she\u2019s been saying Lisa\u2019s name around the castle. But time will tell. Luckily, since it\u2019s a two-episode week, we don\u2019t have to wait long for our answer.<\/p>\n VULTURE NEWSLETTER<\/p>\n Keep up with all the drama of your favorite shows!<\/p>\n Vox Media, LLC Terms and Privacy Notice<\/p>\n
\n Photo: Euan Cherry\/Peacock\n <\/p>\n