Final Fantasy fans, get excited! Today, April 1, Square Enix surprise-revealed Final Fantasy 17, which is set to be a classic turn-based RPG. The first trailer for the game looks stunning, showing off its gorgeous HD-2D visuals and\u2014 wait, what\u2019s that? Oh. I\u2019m so sorry. Apparently that was a joke. My bad.<\/p>\n
I hope you can understand my mistake here. See, today is April Fools\u2019 Day, a big day for the video game industry. Every year, publishers get together to dream up the coolest and definitely not cringe-iest game announcements they can think of, all in the name of tricking you into thinking that awesome thing is real. It\u2019s a fun prank, you know? The influx of hoax announcements can make it hard for a reporter to do their job, hence my slip-up here. Of course Square Enix wouldn\u2019t make a turn-based Final Fantasy game, duh!<\/p>\n
My apologies for the false alarm, but thankfully I do have some other exciting news for RPG fans: Sandfall Interactive has teased its next game. Clair Obscur: Expedition 0 will be a prequel to the Game of the Year-winning Clair Obscur: Expedition 33<\/a>, which focuses on the very first group sent to take down the Paintress\u2014 shit, no, I\u2019m sorry, that\u2019s a joke too, I guess! I can\u2019t believe I fell for that one! I mean, it just kind of sounds like a real game.<\/p>\n Okay, okay, let\u2019s see\u2026 Uh, looks like we\u2019re getting a new Kingdom Hearts spinoff that\u2019s centered around Donald! Nope, that\u2019s another gag. Hmm, how about: Obsidian is making a new Fallout: New Vegas narrative adventure game in the style of Pentiment<\/a>! Oh, that\u2019s supposed to be a joke too. Ha, yeah, I guess I get it. Ooh! Sega is working on an open-world Simpsons game that draws inspiration from Yakuza!? Wow, that actually makes perfect sense! I can\u2019t wait to brawl around Springfield as\u2026 ah. Nevermind.<\/p>\n I think I\u2019m just going to stick to the mundane news today, if you don\u2019t mind. You know, just the kind of stuff that\u2019s so boring that you know that no one is pulling one over on you. For instance, Cubivore is coming to Nintendo Switch Online\u2019s GameCube collection. Simple enough! Wait\u2026 oh come on! Why would you even joke about that? What\u2019s the punchline!?<\/p>\n Forget it! It\u2019s boring business news only from me today! I hope you like sales data and studio inner-studio politics! Here\u2019s a real snoozer for you chuckleheads: Epic Games CEO Tim Sweeney has confirmed that the publisher will not utilize AI to replace its recently laid off employees<\/a>. Instead, Epic will increase its investment in its remaining human staff, rewarding the team behind the mega-successful Fortnite with substantial rai\u2014 oh goddamnit.<\/p>\n That\u2019s it. I\u2019m done. You all have fun today with your japes. I\u2019m logging out for the day and taking a damn walk in the park. I\u2019ll come back when the jokes are done. Hm, wait, what\u2019s this that just hit my inbox? \u201cBloodborne is getting a PS5 patch that will enable a 45fps Performance Mode.\u201d<\/p>\n Hah, nice try, idiots! What do you think I am, fucking stupid?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Final Fantasy fans, get excited! Today, April 1, Square Enix surprise-revealed Final Fantasy 17, which is set to…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":577279,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[49,48,61],"class_list":{"0":"post-577278","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-technology","8":"tag-ca","9":"tag-canada","10":"tag-technology"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577278","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=577278"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/577278\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/577279"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=577278"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=577278"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ca\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=577278"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}