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The letter template<\/a>, last revised in 2024, says: \u201cIn the area of human sexuality instruction, a primary focus will be on sexual abstinence, as this is the only truly safe way to avoid pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.\u201d <\/p>\n Kristen Gilbert, director of education at Options for Sexual Health and a sexual health educator for 20 years, told The Tyee that \u201csimply isn\u2019t true.\u201d<\/p>\n She said that by emphasizing abstinence, Abbotsford is straying outside of B.C.\u2019s comprehensive sex education curriculum, which could mean students are ill-prepared to navigate healthy romantic and sexual relationships later in life.<\/p>\n
If students are missing out on comprehensive information about sexuality because of this policy, the impact is serious, she said. <\/p>\n \u201cI would go so far as to say their right to education is being violated. That\u2019s quite serious,\u201d Gilbert said. <\/p>\n \u201cWhat helps in reducing unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections is knowledge, not lack of knowledge,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n The Abbotsford School District includes 46 schools attended by over 20,000 students. <\/p>\n Nathan Ngieng, superintendent of the Abbotsford School District, told The Tyee its schools still provide a comprehensive sex education to students. The wording around abstinence is a reflection of the \u201ccontext\u201d of the community and what is important to parents, he said. <\/p>\n Working \u201chand in hand\u201d with the community helps invite more people into the conversation to establish the partnership between parents and teachers that is needed to educate students \u201cin the way that makes the most sense and is accurate,\u201d he said. <\/p>\n \u201cWe are bound by the curriculum,\u201d he added. \u201cOur obligation is to make sure that they are equipped with the factual information, well-rounded information, so they can make good decisions about their health and well-being.\u201d <\/p>\n Ngieng said the wording that abstinence is the only \u201ctruly safe\u201d way to avoid pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections could be considered for revision. <\/p>\n All parents in B.C. are permitted to opt their children out of learning sex ed in school, he said.<\/p>\n When parents choose this option, they are responsible for their child learning through an alternative delivery model<\/a> and still have to report back to the teacher to confirm the learning objectives were met, he said. <\/p>\n Comprehensive sex ed<\/p>\n B.C. introduced an age-appropriate sex ed curriculum 30 years ago, Gilbert said. Elementary school students are taught the names of body parts, how their bodies belong to them and whom they can talk to about their body and relationships in their family and communities.<\/p>\n The goal is to get students comfortable with the topic so they\u2019re ready to hear more complex information starting in Grade 8 to help them make decisions in the future they feel great about, Gilbert said.<\/p>\n That includes abstaining from sex until they feel ready, Gilbert said.<\/p>\n Sex ed isn\u2019t just about learning how to use a condom, she said. It\u2019s about learning how to talk about a potentially difficult subject so that youths can navigate their own sexuality, consent and partner\u2019s consent later in life, she said. <\/p>\n Many young British Columbians will become sexually active in the last two years of high school or the next couple of years after that, Gilbert said. Comprehensive sex ed means young people have access to all of the information and resources they need to make decisions that are best for them, she added.<\/p>\n The data about how helpful that is is \u201coverwhelming<\/a>,\u201d she said. <\/p>\n Young people who have received comprehensive sex ed are more likely to wait longer before they start having sex; wait until they feel ready to start having sex; and place higher value on love and connection in sexual relationships. <\/p>\n By comparison, limiting the information<\/a> young people have access to or telling them how they should behave means young people will still have sex, but they will be more secretive and have less knowledge to help them avoid pregnancy and STIs, manage consent conversations, have healthy relationships or seek care and support if something goes wrong, she said. <\/p>\n When young people aren\u2019t taught about sex, they turn to porn for answers, Gilbert said. <\/p>\n And that\u2019s a problem.<\/p>\n
\u2018Porn is not for kids\u2019<\/p>\n \u201cPorn is not for kids. Porn is for adults, and it\u2019s not for education, it\u2019s for entertainment,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n Porn often has \u201creally violent depictions of sex,\u201d she added. \u201cA lot of demeaning portrayals of women, trans people, gay folks. If we learn about sex through porn, we\u2019re learning about the worst of humanity, rather than hearing from a reliable adult or professional about what a healthy relationship and sexuality look like.\u201d<\/p>\n Gilbert said that when she\u2019s teaching sex ed, young people will ask her about exaggerated things from porn that are depicted as normal, such as choking.<\/p>\n Students will ask, \u201cIs choking normal? Is that what my partner expects me to do? Am I supposed to like it?\u201d she said. <\/p>\n Choking, or strangulation, is extremely dangerous. One campaign in Australia<\/a> is working to highlight how there is no safe way to choke someone or be choked.<\/p>\n Abbotsford School District\u2019s Ngieng said community conversations are happening in response to what kids are exposed to, which includes how to invite parents to have conversations with their kids about sensitive topics.<\/p>\n <\/a> <\/p>\n Young People Want Better Sexual Health Care<\/p>\n \t\t\t\tread more <\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n \u201cWe do recognize that inappropriate content can lead to false notions about what is a healthy relationship,\u201d including \u201cthe potential for more prevalence towards intimate partner violence,\u201d he said. <\/p>\n Four out of 10 use the pullout method<\/p>\n Every five years the B.C. Adolescent Health Survey collects data from tens of thousands of Grade 7 to 12 students across the province. <\/p>\n The survey is a helpful way to see how sex ed translates into sexual health for young people, Gilbert said.<\/p>\n In the 2023 edition<\/a>, Abbotsford student data was reported under Fraser East, which included the Chilliwack, Abbotsford, Mission, Fraser-Cascade and Conseil scolaire francophone de la Colombie Britannique school districts. <\/p>\n Students in Fraser East were just as likely to have had oral sex and sexual intercourse as the provincial average, at 17 per cent and 16 per cent, respectively. Most youths who had had sex started doing so at 15 or 16, and one-quarter of non-binary youths said they\u2019d started having sex at age 12 or younger. <\/p>\n Just over half of students in the Fraser region, at 55 per cent, used condoms the last time they had sex, while 44 per cent used the withdrawal method, which the study notes is an unreliable method to prevent pregnancy. One per cent of youths said they had been pregnant or were involved in a pregnancy. <\/p>\n The provincial average<\/a> for using condoms is 53 per cent, with 39 per cent of youths using the pullout method. <\/p>\n <\/a> <\/p>\n Canada\u2019s Sex Ed Is Leaving Immigrant Teens Behind<\/p>\n \t\t\t\tread more <\/p>\n <\/a><\/p>\n Of the 75 per cent of Fraser students who said they\u2019d received sex ed in school, 27 per cent said it wasn\u2019t helpful, compared with 48 per cent who said it was.<\/p>\n Students who found sex ed helpful were more likely to use a condom or other barrier during sex and were less likely to access porn for education than students who didn\u2019t find sex ed helpful, the study noted.<\/p>\n Across Canada, there\u2019s an extraordinarily high level of support among parents<\/a> for students receiving sex ed in schools. <\/p>\n Gilbert said she hopes parents and students will push for better education in Abbotsford. <\/p>\n \u201cOne thing that youth are really good at is advocating for their rights,\u201d she said. \u201cI hope that they will hear that they deserve better and they deserve more.\u201d<\/p>\n If students are looking for reliable resources, Gilbert recommends calling or texting Options for Sexual Health\u2019s Sex Sense line<\/a> or visiting its website<\/a> or the Society of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists of Canada\u2019s website SexandU.ca<\/a>.
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