Kristin Collier thought she was taking a new step into adulthood when she applied for her first credit card at the age of 22. Instead, she walked straight into a financial ambush.
The bank denied her application, and that’s when she found out she was already drowning in debt after someone else had borrowed over $200,000 in her name.
Student loans she never took out. Credit cards she’d never touched. Accounts opened in her name stretching back years. And the person who created the mess wasn’t a scammer in another time zone: it was her mother.
That discovery detonated Collier’s early adulthood, and what followed was a decade of frantic disputes, stonewalling lenders, ruined credit and the emotional fallout of realizing a loved one had jeopardized her financial life while battling a gambling addiction.
It’s a story she’s written about for several publications over the years, but is now detailed in her new book, What Debt Demands: Family, Betrayal, and Precarity in a Broken System, is a sharp warning about how fast hidden debt can grow and the ugly surprise of discovering the threat isn’t an anonymous hacker but someone they love.
Collier ultimately freed herself from the debt. But how did it get there in the first place?
As she dug into the details, Collier learned her mother had used her identity to take out student loans and credit cards in her name without her knowledge. CNBC reports it reviewed legal documents in which Collier’s mother admitted to borrowing money in her daughter’s name (1). And the loan spree stretched far beyond what Collier says she would have needed to fund any schooling.
“She should not have been able to take out those loans,” Collier told the broadcaster in an interview published Dec. 6. “Had the private student loan industry acted responsibly, they would have noticed something was off with my credit history. The amount of money borrowed far exceeded what I ever would need to attend a public university in-state.”
At its peak, the debt reached nearly $400,000 (2), requiring $2,000 a month in payments. Collier worked multiple jobs to stay afloat, all while trying to negotiate with lenders.
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One reason? She refused to put her mother through the criminal legal system. That choice, understandable on a human level, made everything harder. But she refused to pursue financial freedom at the expense of her mother’s literal freedom.
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Finally, it took bankruptcy for the fraudulent loans to finally be wiped from her record.
“After 10 years of refuting this debt, I used the bankruptcy process to force a conversation, and my mother, the lenders and I signed paperwork that removed the debt from my name,” Collier told CNBC. “In some ways, I was lucky, because bankruptcy is not a pathway to relief for most student borrowers.”
All the while, the emotional blow was just as heavy. Collier’s relationship with her mother was broken, and the trust between them had eroded. The toll on Collier’s health had also mounted. Stress-related illnesses, constant anxiety and the grinding fear that this debt would shape her future forever.
Identity theft is widespread, but cases involving family members can be uniquely brutal. Parents and relatives often have easy access to sensitive information that can be used against you. For example, Collier says her mom used her Social Security number and birth date while forging her signature to borrow money in her name. This went on for years before she found out.
So, what can a person do to protect themselves? Here are some steps anyone can take — and ways to rebuild if the fraud has already happened.
Check your credit score: Regularly checking your credit score gives you a chance to spot suspicious activity early and catch identity theft before serious damage occurs.
Recognize the warning signs: Unexpected credit denials, unfamiliar lenders contacting you, new accounts in your credit report or sudden drops in your credit score all point to potential identity theft.
Family reality: Even when a loved one’s involved, victims can file an identity theft report at IdentityTheft.gov, freeze credit files at all three bureaus, and dispute fraudulent accounts. You are not responsible for debt you didn’t authorize.
Move fast: Waste no time documenting everything, including disputed statements, letters, identity theft reports and correspondence. Track deadlines. Keep a folder, physical or digital, with every conversation logged.
Protect yourself: Lock away your Social Security card. Shred financial documents if they’re no longer needed. Enable two-factor authentication security on your digital accounts. Use a password manager. And recognize that financial vulnerability inside a household can make identity theft more likely.
Prep for fallout: File a police report or accept the financial consequences. There is no “right” answer in a case like this, but legal counsel, therapy or mediation can help chart a path that protects both your finances and your well-being.
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