Handsome Touched Me
Season 2
Episode 8
Editor’s Rating
2 stars
**
Photo: Paramount+ via YouTube
Okay, what exactly are we doing here? I’ve gone fairly easy on Landman’s slow pacing this season, because I’ve enjoyed seeing Tommy in a slightly softer mode — and because Cami has ascended to her rightful place at the center of the story (or at least near it). But after tonight’s episode, there are only two left, and the momentum really isn’t building at all.
Like, did we really need another nursing home field trip to eat up time at this point in the season? It begins with Angela getting $10,000 out of her husband via another sexy FaceTime call, the first eyeroll-worthy moment of “Handsome Touched Me.” The second: friendly nurse Margaret repeatedly calling Angela “based” while the old folks chug frozen margaritas on the ride to the casino. The third: Angela demonstrating her “let it ride” strategy at roulette, losing thousands betting on the same color until she hits a crazy win streak.
Angela and Ainsley’s subplots already feel quite removed from the main story at any given point in this show. So the choice to focus this one on a makeover for Margaret, a character two levels removed from the plot, is particularly inexplicable. The actress, Deidra Shanell, gives a decent performance, conveying the character’s buttoned-up tendencies and perhaps a secret desire to break out of her shell. But she just doesn’t … matter. It’s really not that fun to watch our favorite mom-and-daughter duo objectify Margaret and chop up her scrubs into something midriff-bearing — especially because it leads to the most predictable outcomes, including some male leering at the casino and immediate attention from her horny husband at home. (The latter scene is really unnecessary.)
That’s not even mentioning the fact that Angela effortlessly wins $317,622 at the casino that day, a truly reality-breaking turn. Her wins here are framed like another expression of her natural effervescence, her ability to get whatever she wants whenever she wants it. But after a while I just wanted her to lose and face some real consequences for once. What does money really mean in the world of Landman if Angela can pay off practically any debt in a day? I imagine she could fix all of M-Tex’s money issues if she put in a few more days’ work at the casino.
But instead, we’re expected to believe that everything depends on this planned offshore rig. Yep, we’re still talking about that. This is ostensibly the main “story” of the season, but it’s all setup at this point. Will we ever see the actual drilling, or will that happen between episodes (or seasons)? Will it happen during a time jump, or perhaps during a stylish montage showing the mandated progress reports? It’s hard to picture what this is even building to, and how the show could cram it into two episodes.
To be clear, this is still the most interesting thing going on. It’s just getting formulaic. Almost every week, we can expect some meeting at Monty’s old office with Tommy, Cami, Rebecca, and Nate, during which they babble about insurance companies, oil, gas, taxes, and risk. This time Charlie is present, tasked with explaining the situation to Cami. He makes it clear that there’s no guarantee they’ll find gas — 10 percent is the number that keeps getting cited — but also that he believes he can.
Tommy and the attorneys go into this meeting with the intention of getting Cami to shut down the project. As explained in previous weeks, Monty most likely chose not to drill because facing the insurance company in court and paying a settlement was safer in the long run. But Cami isn’t interested in extending litigation for a few years, even if it protects most of her wealth. She wants to keep her word and honor the signed lease — and doesn’t want her family’s name associated with the phrase “misappropriated payout.” Drill, baby, drill.
Nobody else is happy about this decision, obviously. For one, Rebecca is mad at Charlie for downplaying the massive risk and selling his own gas-finding abilities so well. She even snaps and hastily breaks things off between them, leading Charlie to say she’ll be a lonely woman. His word clearly sting, because she’s aware of her own tendency to push people away. I’m not entirely invested in these two as a couple yet anyway, though, so I’m not exactly heartbroken.
As is usually the case, Cami’s material is a lot more compelling. Before the meeting, she has an unpleasant run-in with a stranger who tries to wipe a spot of salad dressing off her face without asking. She tells Tommy about the encounter later on, not having anyone else to vent to, and he consoles her. What makes the moment emotionally complex (and even brings to mind similar “unexpectedly tender” moments on Succession) is its context: These two were just fighting about whether to drill, but Tommy can still be there for her when she needs it. They still care deeply about each other, even though they’re at odds more and more often lately.
Remember how I said every episode features a meeting at Monty’s office? Every episode also features a visit to Danny Morrell’s office where Tommy gets shut down and nothing is accomplished. This time, it’s a last-ditch effort to cancel the rig contract — but Danny has no incentive to cease funding and save M-Tex. Cami secured the loan with lease royalties, so Danny is making a ton of money whether they find gas or not. Even Tommy can admit he wouldn’t pull out now in Danny’s position.
And then there’s T.L. His subplot gets off to an average start in this episode when he gets stuck in the pool, another challenge to his supposed “savor every moment of living” stance. He tells Tommy about someone at his old home who had a severe case of Alzheimer’s yet seemed happy. T.L., by comparison, still has a sharp mind, which makes it all the more torturous to watch his body slowly fail him. It’s a touching admission, an acknowledgment of the reality of aging and the difficulty of facing it with optimism. And his hug with Tommy is pretty rare.
But Sheridan just had to invent another young, beautiful woman to solve T.L.’s problems, didn’t he? Tommy knows his dad won’t consent to real physical therapy, so he hits up a strip club for the next best thing. He offers to pay Cheyenne handsomely to teach T.L. some stretches and get his body moving again, and she agrees — after getting it on the record that she does enjoy dancing and doesn’t need another source of income, thank you very much.
There are ways this type of story could be unexpectedly wholesome, and I guess the aquatherapy scene almost gets there. Repeatedly, though, Sheridan’s script goes for the low-hanging fruit, including the gross moment when Tommy suggests Cheyenne throw in a handjob for his dad if she feels like it. There’s the fact that Cheyenne’s license plate reads “HOT LIPPS,” and the way she shows up in tiny clothes without really explaining who she is to Nate. Apparently she stands there in the pool in her underwear with T.L. for several hours, content to hold this old man close and entertain his vaguely flirtatious questions about her dating life. She seems to be genuinely enjoying herself.
Would this subplot work if Cheyenne didn’t look … well, how she looks? Her sexiness is key to the character; T.L. wouldn’t agree to any form of physical therapy without a hot blonde in her twenties doing it. But sexiness is a key component to practically every female character in this show, and it’s rare we truly get to know them beyond that. At times during season two, I’ve thought the show was improving when it comes to writing women. But the endless objectification embedded into ostensibly feel-good stories — from a harmless makeover to vaguely erotic physical therapy — prevents Landman from really becoming the show it could be. Along with, you know, the total lack of forward plot movement.
• So Cooper is now officially project manager, and it only took five seconds to convince Boss to relinquish his natural lead position. Great.
• What the hell happened to the investigation into the guy who killed himself by an M-Tex well?
• I actually did laugh at T.L. saying, “Get your own therapist, pal,” to Dale.
• “I don’t know what’s in the water these fucking women are drinking. I’m scared to go home tonight.” Not only is this a bit of garden-variety misogyny that pointlessly undercuts Tommy’s real empathy for Cami and Rebecca, but it also just draws attention to how similar the female characters are in Sheridan’s writing.
• T.L. was wearing jeans in the pool!?
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