I’m like, ‘Can this wait, Honor? I’m thinking about rugby’ – The Irish Times
I think I’m on the record somewhere as saying that I’d prefer to be remembered as a great…
‘Drop the Carmela Soprano act, Rosser,’ Ronan goes when I ask him if Sorcha’s ring was stolen – The Irish Times
Ronan is smoking one of his famous rollies in the doorway of the Museum of the Irish Gangster…
Sorcha’s old dear singing sounds like a fox with its head trapped in a gate – The Irish Times
It’s every parent’s worst nightmare. Sorcha goes, “You’re being ridiculous, Ross.” I’m there, “Oh, I’m being ridiculous, am…
At the end of the summer, just like the rest of you, I’m sick of the sight of my children – The Irish Times
I think I’m on the record as saying that being a parent is one of those things that…
‘Your father’s playing golf in Doonbeg,’ Hennessy goes. ‘While the cat’s away, the mice will fornicate’ – The Irish Times
Hennessy is grinning like a dog trying to pass a laundry ball through its urinary tract. Yeah, no,…
‘Oh my God! Your dad’s new girlfriend has entered the Wicklow Pollock Queen competition!’ – The Irish Times
Everybody knows about the Dalkey Lobster Festival. It’s coming up in, like, two weeks’ time, and Sorcha is…
‘My son has opened a museum celebrating criminality. I wish people would stop asking if I’m proud’ – The Irish Times
All of Ronan’s old mates are there. We’re talking Buckets of Blood. We’re talking Stacks of Money. We’re…
‘Charles has changed since moving to Bray. He turned up in Portmornock Golf Club yesterday – wearing a Dryrobe’ – The Irish Times
So – yeah, no – I’m sitting outside in the sun, sucking on a stick of Heinemite and…
‘Your accent is up and down like a focked umbrella,’ I tell the old man – The Irish Times
So me and Ronan swing out to – believe it or not – Bray, just to see how…
Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘I’m not giving that kid the money. Not a focking chance’ – The Irish Times
I absolutely despise Christian’s wife, Lauren. I say it as well. Not to her face obviously. Sorcha goes,…
Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: We filled a skip with all the things Sorcha decided she can live without, until she changed her mind – The Irish Times
So the latest “thing” in our house is the Swedish death clean. For those of you who aren’t…
Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘Nobody can say I haven’t put my body on the line for this Leinster team’ – The Irish Times
The old man says he thinks he might not live long enough to see Leinster win the European…