{"id":190364,"date":"2025-12-13T21:34:08","date_gmt":"2025-12-13T21:34:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/190364\/"},"modified":"2025-12-13T21:34:08","modified_gmt":"2025-12-13T21:34:08","slug":"sure-what-could-possibly-go-wrong-at-an-end-of-exams-party","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/190364\/","title":{"rendered":"Sure, what could possibly go wrong at an end-of-exams party?"},"content":{"rendered":"

As I\u2019m writing this, I am running on very little sleep. I\u2019m just about hobbling to the end of the college semester. Running on fumes, low on iron, anticipating my 10th dose of freshers\u2019 flu to strike the moment I submit my final assignment.<\/p>\n

Confining my life to the library since early November means, it\u2019s been a while since I\u2019ve experienced actual sunlight on my skin. I\u2019ve started shining the torch from my phone on my face every morning, just to feel something.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not a glamorous life. But if there is one great, shining hope for students in December, it is the prospect of a Christmas-themed house party. Never a classy affair, but always a good opportunity for an Instagram story. It\u2019s a bit of a religious occasion for us.<\/p>\n

I feel bad for old people with stable careers and pensions, gearing themselves up for an oh-so-chic office Christmas party. Sure, it\u2019s nice that your company will probably be paying for your dinner and handing out a few free drink tokens.<\/p>\n

But you\u2019ve had to book childcare weeks in advance (or remind your husband that looking after his own children is not babysitting).<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll spend the week before trying to figure out what to get Steve from accounting for Secret Santa.<\/p>\n

All the while knowing that, if you get a little too merry and do something stupid at a staff Christmas party, it could well cost you a job. So grown up, so not fun. <\/p>\n

Gen Z, on the other hand, know how to have fun at Christmas. We don\u2019t have to worry about things like keeping our children alive before we can have fun. We\u2019re not particularly worried about self-preservation either, in my experience.<\/p>\n

For that reason, things can and do go wrong when a group of young people try to host a Christmas party. I know this from experience. We\u2019re so excited to be unshackled from college exams, that we lose all sense of reality.<\/p>\n

I would frame this as helpful advice, but attending a Christmas party hosted by young people will end in disaster. It\u2019s like a Shakespearean tragedy, the fall from greatness, fated. The best we can aim for is minimal reputational damage. Certain things, you can always anticipate happening. <\/p>\n

\"JaneJane Cowan: “Someone will volunteer to mix drinks for everyone. What they won\u2019t say is that they are using alcohol, caffeine and sugary mixers in dangerous ratios. Whatever they concoct, can only lead to poor decision-making.”<\/p>\n

For instance, someone will volunteer to mix drinks for everyone. What they won\u2019t say is that they are using alcohol, caffeine and sugary mixers in dangerous ratios. Whatever they concoct, can only lead to poor decision-making. Like drunk-calling your ex at 3am. Or drunkenly hashing out an argument with a friend. Or divulging your deepest trauma to a stranger just to avoid an awkward lull in conversation.<\/p>\n

If it\u2019s any consolation, you\u2019ve also got a great excuse for poor decisions. I don\u2019t recommend drinking said cocktail with the intention of having an excuse for calling your ex. But you definitely wouldn\u2019t be having an original experience. <\/p>\n

The most important thing to watch out for is any sort of greenery hanging around. Knowing students, they\u2019re probably too cheap to buy actual mistletoe. But if you see a bunch of parsley or a head of lettuce hanging from the ceiling, try to keep moving. Those things should come with a health warning… just vectors for disease.<\/p>\n

I know it\u2019s Christmas, but you\u2019ve got to stay vigilant about these things. Herpes doesn\u2019t take a break for Christmas. And like the Dogs Trust advertisement tells us, that shit is for life. There are real risks here.<\/p>\n

Last year, the love of my life (or so I thought) gave me tonsilitis the week before Christmas.<\/p>\n

So, while my family was chowing down on roast turkey and ham, I was popping penicillin like it was a packet of M&Ms. Was he worth sacrificing my Christmas dinner? My current relationship status would say no. <\/p>\n

When someone decides to include cooking a Christmas dinner in the Christmas party itinerary, the risks reach new depths. I\u2019ve seen too many inebriated attempts at basting a turkey or peeling potatoes. And trust me, no one looks good with singed eyebrows. You may think you\u2019re Gordon Ramsey, but I beg, just order a pizza. <\/p>\n

This year, my friends and I have rented a house for our post-exams Christmas party. We thought we\u2019d treat ourselves to somewhere with actual chairs and less risk of Trinity\u2019s warden giving out to us for getting too rowdy.<\/p>\n

Just a bunch of burnt-out students, embracing the fact that we don\u2019t have a job to lose if we do something stupid. What could possibly go wrong? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"As I\u2019m writing this, I am running on very little sleep. I\u2019m just about hobbling to the end…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":190365,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[8954,61,60,2055,80,430],"class_list":{"0":"post-190364","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-technology","8":"tag-college","9":"tag-ie","10":"tag-ireland","11":"tag-students","12":"tag-technology","13":"tag-university"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/190364","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=190364"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/190364\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/190365"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=190364"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=190364"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=190364"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}