{"id":196180,"date":"2025-12-17T08:52:08","date_gmt":"2025-12-17T08:52:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/196180\/"},"modified":"2025-12-17T08:52:08","modified_gmt":"2025-12-17T08:52:08","slug":"no-its-not-the-most-wonderful-time-of-the-year","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/196180\/","title":{"rendered":"No, It’s Not the Most Wonderful Time of the Year"},"content":{"rendered":"

As a psychologist, I have never felt like the holidays were \u201cthe most wonderful time of the year\u201d. Many of my patients were far more stressed<\/a> during the holidays than the rest of the year. Studies support this observation. There are financial stressors, family stressors, loneliness<\/a>, and the expectations of it all. Here are a few tips to cope with this holiday season.<\/p>\n

The search for perfection will ruin your holidays<\/p>\n

While we often hope to create the \u201cperfect\u201d holiday, most of the time it doesn\u2019t turn out that way. So planning for imperfection will actually help you feel less stressed. Do your best but expect things to go wrong. A helpful way to look at it is to say \u201cof course\u201d when something goes wrong. \u201cOf course the turkey didn\u2019t defrost in time even though you followed the instructions.\u201d \u201cOf course your fridge stopped working just as your guests arrived.\u201d \u201cOf course cousin Jane forgot to tell you that her new boyfriend is very allergic to nuts and your signature item is a nut loaf.\u201d When we expect the imperfections, it makes it easier when life doesn\u2019t go as planned.<\/p>\n

Your family will be \u201con brand\u201d<\/p>\n

Somehow, people expect their family members to become completely different humans during the holidays, and that everyone will get along and be happy. But no, your uncle Bob still drinks too much, your mom still criticizes your clothes, and your brother still brings up the time you forgot him at school. Your family will be your family, probably even more so during the holidays, because everyone is stressed out and has no frontal lobe battery to try to behave better. So a good way to cope is to recognize that each family member is just being \u201con brand.\u201d Like Apple, Nike, or McDonald\u2019s, these brands are instantly recognizable because they are consistent; they show up the same way every time. Your family will also be \u201con brand,\u201d and they will show up as they always do. So when your grandmother once again asks when you will finally get married (as she does every time she sees you), say to yourself, \u201cAhh, she\u2019s just being on brand.\u201d Expecting your family to be themselves makes it less painful when they inevitably do act like themselves.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a cure for loneliness over the holidays<\/p>\n

When people aren\u2019t stressing about family members, they are stressing that they have no family and that they will be alone. Many people feel lonely at the holidays, again because of the expectations of the season. But if you don\u2019t have family nearby, then it\u2019s a great opportunity to build a holiday village. There are often many other people who are lonely during the holidays. Getting together with them or finding ways to volunteer can be a great way to not only reduce your own loneliness but also help others feel less lonely. <\/p>\n

Take-home message on surviving the holidays<\/p>\n

The key message here is to focus on the reality of the holidays and accept the imperfections. When we let go of the expectation that it \u201cshould be\u201d the most wonderful time of the year, we can accept it for what it is and, in the process, have less stress and a more enjoyable holiday season.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"As a psychologist, I have never felt like the holidays were \u201cthe most wonderful time of the year\u201d.…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":196181,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[103,61,60,410,411],"class_list":{"0":"post-196180","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-mental-health","8":"tag-health","9":"tag-ie","10":"tag-ireland","11":"tag-mental-health","12":"tag-mentalhealth"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/196180","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=196180"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/196180\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/196181"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=196180"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=196180"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=196180"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}