{"id":206312,"date":"2025-12-23T05:21:09","date_gmt":"2025-12-23T05:21:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/206312\/"},"modified":"2025-12-23T05:21:09","modified_gmt":"2025-12-23T05:21:09","slug":"should-you-give-your-teenager-alcohol-at-christmas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/206312\/","title":{"rendered":"Should you give your teenager alcohol at Christmas?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Should you give your 15- or 16-year-old an alcoholic drink with their Christmas dinner? After all, many parents do.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s quite a high level of parental alcohol supply in Ireland,\u201d says Emmet Major, co-ordinator with the Planet Youth Project (planetyouth.ie)<\/a>, which every two years surveys approximately 5,000 15- to 16-year-olds in the Galway, Mayo, and Roscommon region. In November 2024, the survey found that 31% reported being drunk in the previous month.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd 25% of all students said they regularly got alcohol from a parent, while 27% regularly drink at a friend\u2019s house,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

Major says parents give alcohol because they believe they can somehow make their child a more responsible drinker.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cThey think it provides an opportunity to talk about the risks and dangers of alcohol \u2014 that\u2019s the rationale. And that if you give them a glass of beer at Christmas when they\u2019re 15 or 17, it\u2019s just the one time.<\/p>\n

\u201cParents say, \u2018Don\u2019t they do it in France, and they don\u2019t have the same problems with abusing alcohol as we do \u2014 maybe that\u2019s the way to go\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

However, the \u201cfollow what the French do\u201d stance does not hold up, says Paula Leonard, CEO of Alcohol Forum Ireland, who says it\u2019s a \u201cpersistent\u201d myth. \u201cYet France has a very high rate of alcoholic liver disease, and the government there is working very hard to reduce alcohol consumption and harm.\u201d<\/p>\n

In fact, says Leonard, France ranks higher than Ireland in terms of total alcohol consumed per person per year. Alcohol kills 134 French people every day, and one in four deaths among young men (15-34) in France is due to alcohol.<\/p>\n

As well as wanting to teach their children about sensible alcohol use, psychologist, neuroscientist and author Dr Sabina Brennan says parents give the Christmas drink at home to avoid alcohol becoming a tempting \u201cforbidden fruit\u201d, and they also feel they\u2019re being inclusive. \u201cThey don\u2019t want their teenager to be left out of adult celebrations.\u201d<\/p>\n

Brennan warns, however, that the parental aim of giving alcohol to teach responsible drinking does not line up with what we know from neuroscience or from population-level data. \u201cGiving alcohol at home doesn\u2019t teach moderation \u2014 it teaches familiarity.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Planet Youth survey bears this out. \u201cThat data tells us that teens who get alcohol from their parents are getting drunk at two and a half times the rate of those whose parents don\u2019t give alcohol,\u201d says Major.<\/p>\n

We need societal change<\/p>\n

The idea that \u201cthey\u2019re better off and safer drinking in front of me than out with friends and in the community\u201d does not stand up, says Leonard. \u201cWhere they\u2019ve been given a drink at home, the research tells us these teenagers will drink in higher volumes when they\u2019re outside of home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Brennan says the big data picture is very consistent: The earlier you start, the higher your risk of later problems.<\/p>\n

\u201cLarge studies have shown people who start drinking before 15 are around four to five times more likely to develop alcohol dependence or abuse compared with those who wait until their 20s,\u201d she says.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd more recent work shows that starting before 15 is also linked to an earlier onset of hazardous drinking patterns in later adolescence and young adulthood.\u201d<\/p>\n

Why does Irish society tolerate giving an addictive, psychoactive substance \u2014 \u201cneurotoxic to the developing teenage brain\u201d \u2014 to our teens? asks Leonard. \u201cWe need a mature, informed, national conversation about it that empowers and informs parents about the impact of alcohol on a teen\u2019s developing brain.\u201d<\/p>\n

Brennan explains that the teenage brain is still under construction, and will be right through to the mid-20s \u2014 and alcohol interferes with the very systems teens need for judgement, learning, and self-control.<\/p>\n

\n The reward system \u2014 the part of the brain that says \u2018that feels good, do it again\u2019 \u2014 is highly active. And the prefrontal cortex \u2014 the area that helps with judgement and self-control \u2014 is still maturing. Alcohol plugs straight into that reward circuitry.\u201d\n <\/p>\n

She points to brain imaging studies showing alcohol use in adolescence is associated with faster loss of grey matter in the frontal lobes (involved in planning, impulse control and decision-making), as well as changes in the hippocampus (memory) and white-matter connections the brain uses to learn efficiently.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cPut simply: starting earlier doesn\u2019t teach moderation \u2014 it increases the odds of heavier drinking and of alcohol becoming a long-term problem.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"DrDr Sabina Brennan: ‘Starting to drink before the age of 15 is also linked to earlier onset of hazardous drinking problems in later adolescence and young adulthood.’ Picture: Lorraine Teevan<\/p>\n

Not only that, but adolescent drinking is associated with higher rates of anxiety, depression, risky sexual behaviour, accidents and injuries, points out Brennan. \u201cAlcohol lowers inhibitions in a brain that already leans towards risk. Alcohol also disrupts sleep architecture, and poor sleep affects mood, school performance, and emotional regulation.\u201d<\/p>\n

Another issue is that teenagers tend not to get the same early warning signs that they\u2019ve had enough, as adults too \u2014 an adult stands up, the room spins, they feel a bit shaky, they think \u201cI\u2019ve had enough\u201d. The teen brain doesn\u2019t get this message, says Brennan.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s why so many teens end up with alcohol poisoning. And teens will compete with each other \u2014 \u2018I can drink more than you\u2019 \u2014 not realising their brain isn\u2019t going to say \u2018you\u2019ve had enough\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

Brennan calls it \u201ca risky combination\u201d \u2014 teens feeling the rewards of alcohol more strongly and the warning signs less.<\/p>\n

While your teen may be at a developmental stage where it seems all they want to do is push you away, Leonard says it is important for parents to understand they are a powerful positive influence on their child, even at the teen stage.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what we\u2019re doing by giving our teen their first alcoholic drink at the table is actually giving them permission to drink, saying we approve of them drinking alcohol. There\u2019s a psychological and unspoken approval.\u201d<\/p>\n

Brennan agrees that offering our teens alcohol teaches three powerful messages \u2014 whether we mean to or not:<\/p>\n

\u201cAlcohol is how grown-ups celebrate\u201d: \u201cLinking alcohol to Christmas and special occasions tells the brain that drink is part of joy and connection.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is your ticket into adulthood\u201d: \u201cA first drink is often framed as a rite of passage \u2014 \u2018you\u2019re old enough now\u2019 \u2013 so alcohol becomes tied to status and identity.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe expect you to drink\u201d: \u201cEven if you say \u2018only with us\u2019, many teens will hear this as a green light.<\/p>\n

Frame it differently<\/p>\n

So how do you handle it when your 16-year-old is telling you her friend will be having a small glass of wine with Christmas dinner this year, so why can\u2019t she? Brennan advises:<\/p>\n

Be clear and calm about your rule: \u201cWe love celebrating with you, but because your brain and body are still developing, we\u2019re keeping Christmas alcohol-free for you. That\u2019s our job \u2014 to protect your health now so you have more choices later.\u201d<\/p>\n

Offer something special instead: A favourite mocktail, fancy glassware, or a \u201cgrown- up\u201d non-alcoholic drink can help them feel included without sending the message that alcohol is essential to celebration.<\/p>\n

Name the peer pressure: \u201cI know some of your friends may be allowed to drink. Different families have different rules. We\u2019re basing ours on what we know about the teenage brain and long-term health.\u201d<\/p>\n

Model your own relationship with alcohol: If adults are drinking heavily at the table while telling teens \u201cnot for you\u201d, the message won\u2019t land. Showing that you can celebrate without overdoing it \u2014 or better still, without alcohol at all \u2014 is incredibly powerful.<\/p>\n

And, says Brennan, \u201cif feeling wobbly about saying no, it may help to remember that every year you delay your child\u2019s drinking, you\u2019re nudging the odds in favour of better brain health, better mental health, and a lower risk of addiction in adulthood. Imagine giving a 14-year-old a cigar after Christmas dinner or a cigarette.\u201d<\/p>\n

In many ways, it comes down to biology, says Brennan. \u201cTeen brains aren\u2019t built for alcohol. Saying no to alcohol at Christmas isn\u2019t being strict \u2014 it\u2019s being protective of a vulnerable, developing brain.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd you can say no with warmth: \u2018Your brain is still growing \u2014 my job is to protect it\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n *To support parents in delaying teenage drinking:
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