![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/bluff4.jpeg\")
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/bluff2.jpeg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Priyanka Chopra Jonas furies through fight choreography and Karl Urban makes a worthy villain even if all the CGI in the world can\u2019t make Australia look like \u201cthe Caribbean\u201d in the the brutish, humorless pirate picture \u201cThe Bluffs.\u201d<\/p>\n
Co-writers Joe Ballarini and Frank E. Flowers (who also directed) cobble together characters and cliches from many a pirate tale for this ham-fisted affair, which sacrifices fun for fighting and sinks like a stone. <\/p>\n
Set a dozen years after \u201cPirates of the Caribbean\u201d had been wiped out \u2014 the 1840s \u2014 the film\u2019s novelty is draping murderous cutthroats in ninja black and giving a few of them scoped sniper rifles and revolvers.<\/p>\n
There was a time when the only pirate whose (single shot muzzle-loading) pistol fired repeatedly was Errol Flynn. But not here. <\/p>\n
The dread pirate Connor (Urban) lost his treasure and is damned determined to find it. His multi-national crew (Temuera Morrison plays his \u201cquartermaster\u201d) is content to ride down tiny merchant ships and capture Captain Bodden. But when Bodden appears to have a sample of Connor\u2019s gold in hand, Connor knows the island paradise of Cayman Brac is where his booty is hidden.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s a multi-cultural \u201cemancipated British colony\u201d of peaceful folks with barely the wherewithal to defend themselves save for a plan to summon British help with a signal fire on \u201cThe Bluff.\u201d Fat chance of that, with snipers and scouts leading the slaughter on Captain Connor\u2019s behalf.<\/p>\n
But Ercell (Chopra Jonas), Bodden\u2019s wife, stops fretting over his sister\u2019s (Safia Oakley-Green) plans to sneak off with a sailor and gets her \u201chobbled\u201d (on crutches) son (Vendante Naidoo) hidden. In a flash she\u2019s kicking ass and letting one and ll know that \u201cAye\u201d and \u201carrrr,\u201d she used to be a pirate herself.<\/p>\n
There\u2019ll be no \u201cbooty\u201d surrendered here, mates. Let the body count begin, \u201cCaptain.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t ever call me that again!\u201d<\/p>\n
There are plot points \u2014 an attack on the homestead, a cave full of treasure, etc. \u2014 borrowed from every swashbuckler from \u201cTreasure Island\u201d to \u201cPirates of the Caribbean.\u201d <\/p>\n
But the blood-spattered Indian superstar isn\u2019t in it for fun.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you injured?\u201d \u201cNot as bad as them!\u201d<\/p>\n
Landscapes and ships at sea alike are faked and obviously so for the settings. <\/p>\n
The subplots are even less interesting than the plot, and not allowing Urban a few moments of quipping, glint-in-the-eye villainy is as big a shortcoming as not scripting India\u2019s most popular actress better one-liners. <\/p>\n
Director Flowers doesn\u2019t allow himself or anybody else the leisure to stop and smell the roses or crack wise. He wrote the \u201cBob Marley: One Love\u201d movie, but there\u2019ll be no accurate history here. And the director of \u201cI Wish I was Gay\u201d appears to have no sense of humor.<\/p>\n
The only \u201cplayful\u201d thing about this bloody-minded bore is the title, an intended \u201cplay\u201d on words. And even that doesn\u2019t play.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/rogersmovienation.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/1half-star.png?ssl=1\")
<\/a><\/p>\n