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Hacks<\/a><\/p>\n No New Tricks<\/p>\n \n Season 5<\/p>\n Episode 3\n <\/p>\n \n Editor\u2019s Rating<\/p>\n 5 stars<\/p>\n *****\n <\/p>\n \n Our girls get hyped up for their dates with an international rock star and a sex worker. I know that, these days, our half-hour prestige comedies are more about big-season arcs and less about little one-off adventures, but I like when we can go back to the sitcom-y start of it all and get an episode that does a comedy classic: to allow our stars to think that, for a moment, some core part of their lives could change, only to have them wind up basically where they started and maybe a liiiiiittle bit wiser for the road ahead of them.<\/p>\n Foretelling her upcoming romantic tryst, Deborah wears what I deem a Queen of Hearts ensemble \u2014 she calls it an \u201cace in the hole\u201d showgirl fit that conveys that she is a \u201ctimeless, humble sex icon,\u201d which is what I aspire to be when I grow up as well \u2014 to a party at the Palmetto. The event is to celebrate their new artist-in-residence, Nico Hayes (The Summer I Turned Pretty \u201cConnie Baby\u201d Christopher Briney). Nico is referred to by Ava as \u201can international rock star,\u201d and I hate to be a bitch about this, but we simply aren\u2019t making international rock stars anymore; I would buy \u201cpop star,\u201d however, in the Harry Styles mold.<\/p>\n Next week is set to have an even bigger event: Marty is getting married! Again! He thinks it \u201cmight\u201d be his last wedding, to which Deborah replies, \u201cNothing says love like a subjunctive verb.\u201d I love the Marty-Deborah dynamic; despite their cattiness, I really believe that they always want the best for each other \u2014 a rare thing in Deborah\u2019s circles. (Remember he offered to put Deborah up in his Hawaiian property<\/a> at the end of last season, before she detoured to Singapore.) For now, though, the girls are having meet-cutes: Ava reaches for the same cheeseburger slider as a hot guy who, to her absolute delight, is a sex worker (nothing like an opportunity to prove she\u2019s game to live her politics!), while Deborah is summoned to a VIP area to meet Nico, a fellow Lanc\u00f4me ambassador and a self-professed \u201chuge fan\u201d of hers. Her residency is what inspired his residency. He thinks she\u2019s an icon!<\/p>\n I think it\u2019s so funny how famous people truly cannot \u2014 or will not \u2014 do anything for themselves. Being a celebrity is like being a toddler forever. That\u2019s why they\u2019re all like that! Case in point: Rather than ask Deborah for her number in person, Nico had his publicist call Jimmy, who calls Deborah to say that Nico would love to take her out for dinner. No pressure, but \u201cpeople are calling you guys \u2018Nicorah,\u2019\u201d he tells her. Deborah is too jaded to even consider the possibility that Nico\u2019s invite is genuinely romantic; she immediately assesses the situation as a shrewd PR stunt, and, of course, she\u2019s on board. (Jimmy: \u201cYou know what I always say: Stars \u2014 they\u2019re just like each other.\u201d)<\/p>\n I enjoyed watching both of our girls get hyped up for their dates \u2014 especially Deborah\u2019s escalating giddiness once she discovers, post-date, that Nico was genuinely into her, even though I knew in my heart their glory would be short-lived. I can\u2019t imagine our show would distract these two for long from their real love story (each other) so close to the end of the series.<\/p>\n For Ava, the thrill of a date with a man \u2014 maybe she\u2019ll get killed! Has she been listening to that murder podcast with the MSG show<\/a>? \u2014 is enough to get her turned on, though not enough to stop her from dressing like a sad mechanic. In my notes I write, \u201cPLEASE, change your clothes, you\u2019re embarrassing me!!!\u201d She still manages to really spark with this guy and spends the night making out with him. Good for her!<\/p>\n Meanwhile, Deborah preps for what she thinks is a stunt date by calling in her favorite paparazzo and arrives to discover that she and Nico have, like, soooo much in common! Nico has been betrayed by loved ones from day one (his dad sold his homecoming photos to E! So sad! Fame is a curse!) and swears he knew those stories about Deborah\u2019s \u201cbreakdown\u201d were bullshit. He, too, came to Vegas alone to make it in show business. Deborah, suitably impressed, lets this fine young man make out with her at the restaurant. I died at Deborah\u2019s faux-dramatic horror at the sight of the paparazzi, which she literally called, outside the restaurant. Her over-the-shoulder good-bye shot? The pawing at Nico\u2019s chest as she cries, \u201cI need SPACE!\u201d Perfection.<\/p>\n I have often wondered if Deborah is even capable of having a relationship that is not also, in some way, a transaction. As you may recall, every guest at Ava\u2019s birthday party<\/a>, save for Ava\u2019s family and sort-of-friend Jenny, was someone on Deborah\u2019s payroll. Ava, her \u201cbest friend,\u201d is also in her employ. Even before the Nico situation collapses in an inevitable fashion, it\u2019s clear that they are a mismatch \u2014 not in a problematic age-gap way (it\u2019s cool to see women in male-dominated fields!!) \u2014 but in a deeper, values-driven way. The pure, private life that Nico wants is, as far as I can tell, not at all appealing to Deborah.<\/p>\n But let\u2019s not get ahead of ourselves: Deborah returns from the date to shriek and giggle with Ava about kissing and having inside jokes already and bringing their hot dates to Marty\u2019s wedding. (Nico\u2019s response to Deborah\u2019s late-night invite \u2014 \u201cCan I wear white?\u201d \u2014 would absolutely have worked on me, so congratulations to Nico. A man who can text!) Deborah calls Marty in the middle of the night to secure these plus-ones. The next day, while rocking out to her boyfriend\u2019s album, she gets a visit from Marcus. He wants to buy the Paradiso, one of the only historic casinos left in Vegas, and turn it into something like the Ace Hotel in Palm Springs. Deborah\u2019s cold-hearted business advice is that it\u2019s too big a risk.<\/p>\n Then she flits away for her second date with Nico, who bought out a whole restaurant so they could be free to \u201cyou know \u2026 whatever.\u201d I loooove to you know, whatever!!! But it all comes crashing down when the paparazzi out Deborah for having called them on her. Nico dumps her in a fantastically cruel and humiliating way: by kicking her out of his car in front of this phalanx of press. This reminds me of the great Nora Ephron line about never marrying someone you wouldn\u2019t want to be divorced from<\/a>. I\u2019m sorry I was ever rooting for this child! He will not be attending the wedding, and Deborah will not be allowed to retouch any of these photos.<\/p>\n Ava\u2019s night is also taking a turn. In a postcoital convo, basking in the glow of a job well done by a true professional, Ava finds out that her paramour is not only a sex worker (that\u2019s just what pays the bills); he\u2019s really a magician. Worse: He is a bad magician. When he said, \u201cLet me show you a trick,\u201d I said, out loud, \u201cOh NO,\u201d and I continued to say \u201cOh NO\u201d to my screen when I saw that Deborah was spending the day after getting dumped sending an ungodly number of texts to Nico.<\/p>\n Ava and Deborah get in a very funny slapstick battle over Deborah\u2019s phone, which Ava does ultimately win. She reports that Nico has blocked Deborah, meaning she\u2019s attending the wedding alone. Ava is there as well, and I assumed the embarrassing thing for her would be her date running into a client, which does happen, but it\u2019s not the embarrassing thing \u2014 his extremely satisfied customer, Mayor Jo, is all too happy to see Ava is also enjoying this \u201cartist.\u201d Instead, two worse things happen (I will let you be the judge of which one is the worst worse thing): (1) As Marty\u2019s bride, actually age-appropriate Victoria, is walking down the aisle, the FBI burst in to report that she is Eleanor, not Victoria, and that she is under arrest for fraud, and (2) Ava\u2019s date, indignant that Ava is mortified by his commitment to magic, dumps her and quits the sex work at which he excels to pursue magic full-time.<\/p>\n Deborah finds Marty hanging his head in shame. She is kind to him and he immediately pivots to proposing. While it\u2019s very nice that he knows her middle name, she swiftly and tenderly rejects him. She says something sweet about how it is a gift to be their age and still take the risks that can get your heart broken. She offers Marty an AARP twist on a classic vow: If they\u2019re both still single when they\u2019re 100, she\u2019ll marry him.<\/p>\n Off this pep talk, Deborah finds Marcus and tells him to do the Paradiso after all. She\u2019ll pitch in! She misses working together; they could be partners. She even offers to be a silent investor, to which I say: Deborah, silent? Ooookay, I\u2019ll believe that when I hear it, but I\u2019m excited for this development! A new home for Deborah\u2019s next residency, perhaps?<\/p>\n Apparently two dates and a (honestly, very understandable) misreading on Deborah\u2019s part was enough to inspire Nico to write a song called \u201cFunny Girl,\u201d which includes the lyric \u201cFunny how you lie so easily,\u201d and it\u2019s not not like a less-catchy version of \u201cSuch a Funny Way,\u201d<\/a> but Deborah probably didn\u2019t listen to Man\u2019s Best Friend (Bonus Track Version), so she does not make this connection. Instead she is horrified that only one side of the story is getting out, and it\u2019s the one with a fan base that is calling her \u201cchopped.\u201d Fortunately, Ava can see this situation for what it really is: excellent promo for the Madison Square Garden show.<\/p>\n Sign Up for the Vulture Newsletter<\/p>\n Entertainment news, for the pop-culture obsessed.<\/p>\n Vox Media, LLC Terms and Privacy Notice<\/p>\n
\n Photo: HBO Max\n <\/p>\n