Googling what a slam pig is<\/a>. It\u2019s a relief that I wasn\u2019t the only one who had to research after last week\u2019s episode, and that it\u2019s such a deep cut that there are even locals who aren\u2019t in the loop. \u201cA promiscuous woman, typically overweight or ugly, and only sought after for pumping and dumping,\u201d the definition says. This show is nothing if not educational.<\/p>\nThe conversation then turns to whether or not it\u2019s normal for Kelsey\u2019s ex to keep paying for her life \u2014 and of course it\u2019s not. Though an argument I can get behind is that it\u2019s basically the equivalent of common law alimony, and while I do think Kelsey is right to be milking this for all it\u2019s worth, let\u2019s not pretend it\u2019s normal. While she says she doesn\u2019t have to do anything in return, there is a footnote. She says in her confessional that if things were to get more serious with Bill, her ex would stop paying \u2014 so it doesn\u2019t seem like this arrangement is quite as \u201cno strings attached\u201d as she\u2019d like to make it seem. And now we can\u2019t help but wonder if her ex\u2019s financial involvement has (or will have) an impact on the trajectory of her and Bill\u2019s relationship. But again, it\u2019s a tough deal to pass up. \u201cI don\u2019t want to be homeless like Alicia,\u201d Kelsey says, bringing the conversation back to the story Alicia told them in Newport. Liz and Jo-Ellen\u2019s husband, both of whom grew up with Alicia\u2019s family, maintain that she was never homeless\u00a0 \u2014 but we\u2019ll get into all of that more later.<\/p>\n
First, it\u2019s time for trivia at Ashley and Jared\u2019s coffee shop. \u201cAubrey\u2019s is so cute, I love Aubrey\u2019s,\u201d Alicia says about Audrey\u2019s (with a D). The first trivia question is so apropos that I can\u2019t help but wonder if production had a hand in writing it, but even fresh off of the \u201cslam pig\u201d heard \u2018round the world, the table is unable to remember that the pig in Toy Story is named Hamm. Tough. But speak of the devil, in walks Kelsey with a tiara and sash that reads, \u201cMiss Slam Pig.\u201d After that, Jared\u2019s trivia didn\u2019t stand a chance<\/p>\n
Everybody\u2019s there, except Rulla of course, who refuses to appear more than once per episode (and didn\u2019t want to see Jo-Ellen) \u2014 and the women all instantly start shifting back and forth between the two tables that were arranged to keep Rosie and Kelsey separated. The conversation is strictly about their drama, despite Ashley\u2019s attempts to keep trivia alive by asking them the name of a big blue bug. \u201cI think it\u2019s just a big blue bug,\u201d Alicia replies. Soon enough, Rosie and Kelsey are screaming at each other again and bedlam breaks out. Ashley is behind the counter crying to Jared, and wonders, \u201cCan\u2019t we just have a normal conversation that isn\u2019t about drama?\u201d If that was a trivia question, I\u2019d get it right: the answer is NO, on account of this literally being the Real Housewives. \u201cOink oink motherfucker,\u201d Kelsey yells, as the rest of the women congregate under the table to hide from the bickering, until Rosie finally storms out. Not a single question was correctly answered the entire time, by the way.<\/p>\n
Back at Alicia\u2019s house, she\u2019s put together a business plan to try to convince Billy to give her a stake in Pizza Mamma\u2026 in the form of a tri-fold poster board. \u201cNumber one, what made Pizza Mamma different than any other pizza restaurant?\u201d she asks, before pointing to the word \u201cchandeliers\u201d on the science fair-esque project. If I were a Shark Tank shark, I\u2019d hand over millions of dollars instantly, even before she got to the heart-shaped pizzas and new uniforms. After the presentation, the pair sits down to actually get into business, and Alicia explains that she wants to set an example of independence for Celina rather than be dependent on a man, the same way her mother was. Just like we saw with Jo-Ellen, we\u2019re seeing another example on this show of breaking generational cycles.<\/p>\n
A lot of this conversation revolves around trust, and the question of whether or not Billy trusts her as a businessperson. In turn, Alicia wants a stake in part because she can\u2019t trust any man not to abandon her the way that her father did \u2014 so this desire for involvement comes from a very deep place. \u201cYou came in and made it magical, and I agree that you should be compensated for that,\u201d Billy finally says, agreeing to give her a percentage of his stake in Pizza Mamma \u2014 the terms of which she writes out on a notepad. That\u2019s all good and well, but I won\u2019t be content until I know this is all spelled out in a legally binding contract.<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, Rosie calls Ashley to apologize for the blowup that happened at trivia, and says that she\u2019s inviting all of the women to Rich\u2019s show in South Boston. Well, all of the women except Kelsey, obviously. And naturally, Rulla never got back to her because, as we know, Rulla does not film. In fact, I wouldn\u2019t be surprised if Rulla only found out about the existence of this show when it started airing. Honestly, I don\u2019t even care who\u2019s there, I\u2019m just glad we\u2019re finally going to get to hear Rich sing in his little pinky ring \u2014 so long as we\u2019re able to hear him over the fight that\u2019s sure to break out in the front row.<\/p>\n
Jo-Ellen, Liz, and Alicia carpool together to the gig, bringing along a massive, loose charcuterie board into the SUV with them, which they prop up between the two seats. \u201cYou know, I love a slam pig. I\u2019ve been saying that since my whole life. My mother said that,\u201d Alicia says, as they talk about Rosie and Kelsey\u2019s feud. Then, in the middle of the conversation, Liz SCREAMS because she thought they were speeding into the car in front of them.<\/p>\n
But that\u2019s not the only screaming she does on this ride, because soon the conversation turns to Alicia\u2019s childhood trauma, and once again Liz starts disagreeing with her use of the word \u201chomeless.\u201d But before they get into this, Liz chaotically switches seats with Jo-Ellen on the highway so she can sit next to Alicia. \u201cWe had no home, that\u2019s homeless,\u201d Alicia says, upset that Liz chose to pick apart her wording rather than have empathy for the story she was sharing. Though she struggles to articulate this in the car, Liz clarifies in her confessional that she\u2019s harping on the word choice because she thinks Alicia\u2019s family (and the country watching at home) would take issue with that phrasing.<\/p>\n
Those alleged good intentions don\u2019t resonate in the moment, and Alicia starts crying while Jo-Ellen attempts to mediate the situation from the backseat. After all, they have a full Frank Sinatra tribute act to get through after this, but all that does is irritate Liz further. I guess in a way it\u2019s fitting to kick off Sinatra night by saying somethin\u2019 stupid.<\/p>\n
Sign up for the Housewives Institute Bulletin<\/p>\n
Dame Brian Moylan breaks down all the gossip and drama, on- and off-screen, for dedicated students of the Reality Television Arts and Sciences.<\/p>\n
Vox Media, LLC Terms and Privacy Notice<\/p>\n
By submitting your email, you agree to our Terms<\/a> and Privacy Notice<\/a> and to receive email correspondence from us.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Rosie and Kelsey\u2019s ongoing feud should serve as a wake-up call to Ashley that, no, there will not…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":465676,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[15171,93,61,60,15169,10796,3797,15170,82302,282,15168],"class_list":["post-465675","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-tv","tag-bravo","tag-entertainment","tag-ie","tag-ireland","tag-overnights","tag-reality-tv","tag-recaps","tag-the-real-housewives","tag-the-real-housewives-of-rhode-island","tag-tv","tag-tv-recaps"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/465675","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=465675"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/465675\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/465676"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=465675"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=465675"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=465675"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
![](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/05\/ebab5267ddbe4c4a38b9873b8959ec07f9-rhori-ep9.rsquare.w400.png\")
<\/p>\n