{"id":502190,"date":"2026-06-16T08:42:12","date_gmt":"2026-06-16T08:42:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/502190\/"},"modified":"2026-06-16T08:42:12","modified_gmt":"2026-06-16T08:42:12","slug":"fostering-30-children-you-dont-just-change-their-lives-they-change-yours-as-well-the-irish-times","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/502190\/","title":{"rendered":"Fostering 30 children: \u2018You don\u2019t just change their lives, they change yours as well\u2019 \u2013 The Irish Times"},"content":{"rendered":"

Fostering 30 children may seem like an incomprehensible prospect to many people, but growing up in Lagos, Nigeria<\/a>, Helen Ogbu<\/a> was used to having lots of children around the house. Not only did Ogbu have seven siblings, her parents regularly returned from visits to their home village with children from families who were struggling to take care of them.<\/p>\n

\u201cThese children grew up with us, and they became like our brothers, our family. I didn\u2019t know it as fostering. It was just my family being nice, being kind, and sending kindness and love and warmth to other children, and to other families.\u201d<\/p>\n

Ogbu didn\u2019t set out to become a foster parent. \u201cSomeone gave my details to the fostering department in Roscommon. They were trying to organise a recruitment drive amongst migrants,\u201d she explains.<\/p>\n

Ogbu is a widow. She moved to Ireland 21 years ago, while her husband remained in Nigeria and would visit. \u201cMy husband was assassinated in Nigeria. He was a politician,\u201d she says explaining one of the reasons she moved to Ireland with her daughter was due to fears for their safety.<\/p>\n

Her own daughter ChiChi was just seven years old when Ogbu started fostering. \u201cThe one thing I\u2019ve always done is give my daughter a voice and seek her opinion and have a talk with her about whatever I was doing. Because I don\u2019t see it as just myself doing it … I had to check with her how she felt about it, because I know that every child brings their own story, their own struggles. And also strengths and potentials as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her daughter was \u201cexcited\u201d about it, she says.<\/p>\n

Ogbu was very mindful of the age of the children she fostered, choosing typically to foster children who were either younger or older than her daughter. The children she has fostered over the years come from very diverse backgrounds, and range in age from under two years up to adulthood. She has fostered families too. <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve fostered white Irish children, coloured Irish children, Traveller children, Ukranian children,\u201d she says, adding that she tried to support cultural differences in any way she could, in the hope of making the transition easier for children involved. <\/p>\n

\u201cIf I had an Irish child to support I would say, because I\u2019m in Ireland, because I\u2019ve immersed myself in the culture, because I understand the culture, it was easy. At the same time, I have Irish friends, so what I do is check with them about certain things. How do I make this food for this child? How do I make the best spuds?\u201d she says, laughing.<\/p>\n

\"GalwayGalway City Councillor and foster carer Helen Ogbu. Photograph: Joe O’Shaughnessy <\/p>\n

That goes for marking special occasions too. \u201cDuring Christmas, I would always ask every child, if I had children from different backgrounds in my care … what is the one thing you would want for Christmas? Everybody must have a taste of their culture for their Christmas.\u201d<\/p>\n

That\u2019s not to say fostering has always been easy, she says, recalling a difficult placement where a child from Ukraine was put in her care. \u201cSometimes, we hear about things happening in Ukraine<\/a> or Gaza<\/a>, and then you experience it in your home.\u201d<\/p>\n

She tells of the fear the child felt around noise. \u201cOnce this child hears a sound, he gets so scared \u2013 \u2018it\u2019s here, it\u2019s bombing\u2019.\u201d <\/p>\n

She finds the memory upsetting. \u201cHe had tears in his eyes … He told me \u2018it\u2019s taking me back to Ukraine, it\u2019s taking me back home\u2019. For me to be able to provide that shelter, that comfort, love and hope for this child. But then knowing that he\u2019s not getting it because there\u2019s something that constantly reminds him of what he\u2019s been through.\u201d<\/p>\n

On another occasion a child with significant psychological needs was placed in her care. \u201cI wasn\u2019t given the right information … it was really traumatic,\u201d she says. It had a huge effect on another foster child who was in her care too, she says. It didn\u2019t put her off, however, and she shares how fostering has even led to her experiencing the joy of grandchildren. \u201cI\u2019m privileged to call myself a granny as a result of fostering. I\u2019ve gained an extended family as a result of fostering.\u201d<\/p>\n

A Galway City councillor, Ogbu recently ran in the Galway West byelection<\/a> for the Labour Party, finishing third. <\/p>\n

\"HelenHelen Ogbu <\/p>\n

Although from Nigeria herself, she says many Nigerian families wouldn\u2019t choose to have their children placed in her care. \u201cFostering is a taboo in African [communities], especially in Ireland,\u201d she says. \u201cBecause they would be seen as being failures in parenting. Because we are a minority we are easier to identify.\u201d She has, though, fostered some Nigerian children.<\/p>\n

Naturally, there is huge emotional investment in the children Obgu cares for, and she admits it\u2019s \u201cvery hard\u201d when they leave her care. She sees her foster children as her children. \u201cI don\u2019t want to view them differently.\u201d<\/p>\n

The relationship, once they leave her care, is guided by the foster child. Some, she explains, prefer to leave that part of their life behind them. Others \u201cstill want to maintain that relationship with you, because they see you as the mum that was not there, or they never had. They see you as that person … they can talk to if they need to share anything, or if they have any worries.<\/p>\n

\u201cSome of them call me mum.\u201d<\/p>\n

[\u00a0Jen Hogan\u2019s end-of-year school report: B in cake sales, C+ in WhatsApp, E in lunchesOpens in new window<\/a>\u00a0]<\/p>\n

Where appropriate, Ogbu supports the children\u2019s relationships with their biological families, \u201cespecially if it\u2019s not something that will be to the detriment of the child\u201d. She has even helped some foster children to find biological family members.<\/p>\n

She would absolutely encourage other people to consider fostering. \u201cFostering has been one of the most rewarding journeys of my life. Watching young people overcome the challenges they face and move forward with confidence is very, very special to me,\u201d she says, but points to the State needing to support foster carers too.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy tagline has always been whenever anyone, and any prospective foster carer, someone who is considering fostering, opens your home to a child, you don\u2019t just change their lives, they change yours as well.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Fostering 30 children may seem like an incomprehensible prospect to many people, but growing up in Lagos, Nigeria,…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":502191,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[4500,149291,3409,197845,61,60,43,21913,1786,9688],"class_list":["post-502190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-ireland","tag-galway","tag-galway-west-constituency","tag-gaza-strip","tag-helen-ogbu","tag-ie","tag-ireland","tag-news","tag-nigeria","tag-parenting","tag-ukraine-crisis"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/502190","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=502190"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/502190\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/502191"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=502190"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=502190"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/ie\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=502190"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}