Photo-Illustration: by The Cut; Photos: Getty Images
The day I met Lady Martha Sitwell — the eccentric breakout star of Bravo’s Ladies of London: The New Reign — I heard her before I saw her. She has a signature laugh that is both booming and repetitive and somehow deliciously charming.
We met for a drink at Sketch, a fancy artistic eatery in the heart of Mayfair, where every chair has tasteful tassels and the toilets alone are a tourist attraction. Unsurprisingly, Sitwell looked immaculate. Her hair was perfectly curled, and she wore red lipstick and a leopard-print dress by designer Stewart Parvin. (It’s on loan, she told me without hesitation when I complimented her.) The dress was hidden beneath a floor-length mink-fur coat. (The coat is very old, she insisted, she’d never buy new fur.)
Moments after sitting down, Sitwell explained — at a million words a minute — the slightly convoluted story of how she ended up on Ladies of London, which is a reboot of the original series that ran between 2014 and 2017. It started years ago with a chance meeting with a TV producer. Then, years later, a psychic medium recalled the name of the producer — who, by this point, was working on the LoL reboot. The stars aligned and, before she knew it, Sitwell — who had never watched reality TV before — had agreed to become a Bravoleb without the faintest idea of what that entails. After she signed her Bravo contract, she went home and watched two episodes of The Kardashians. “I thought, Well, they’re the most successful reality stars, so they’re the ones to emulate if you’re going to emulate anyone,” she tells me. “Then I instantly thought, Well, you can’t emulate them. You are nothing like them! So just be you.”
So who is Lady Martha Sitwell? She’s an aristocrat who has lived many lives, describing herself as living “the eternal riches-to-rags, rags-to-riches story.” She grew up in a privileged family as the daughter of wealthy restaurateurs, but she became estranged from them in her teenage years. Before long, she found herself homeless and living on the streets of London. At 17, Sitwell was discovered by fashion titan Vivienne Westwood as she was begging for money. She soon began modeling for her, which totally transformed her life. At 26, Sitwell married Sir George Sitwell, an investment banker from one of Britain’s well-connected families. The marriage lasted a decade but ended acrimoniously. On Ladies of London, she describes being left with nothing (except the title of “Lady”) after the divorce.
As she pulls back the curtain on high-society life, Sitwell represents a reality that might seem bizarre to Americans: that someone can have a “title” but not be rich. On the show, when we first meet her, she’s finding her feet in the aftermath of another painful breakup with yet another aristocrat — this time from Harry Dalmeny, the Earl of Rosebery. She has found an unlikely sanctuary in “the Grottage,” a rented home in London that earns its nickname due to its damp walls, frayed carpets, and peeling wallpaper. It’s also covered in bird poo, because Hecate — her pet magpie (yes, you read that right) — has free reign. (She adopted Hecate as a baby and spent weeks hand-feeding her using tweezers.)
Among the cast of Ladies of London — a seven-strong group including a Marchioness, a self-styled “etiquette expert,” and the sophisticated (and bitchy) son of a Russian princess — Sitwell has emerged as a lovable eccentric and also a voice of reason in their fiery confrontations, which she finds “very difficult” to navigate. She is simultaneously unlike anyone I’ve seen on TV before while also reminding me of someone like RHONY’s Sonja Morgan, with a healthy sprinkle of Little Edie, who fans live in hope will learn to make good decisions and stop trusting the wrong people.
During our conversation, she gives me a horrifying update on what really happened with the “painter” (stranger) to whom she gave her house keys, plus her golden rules for hosting parties, canceling plans, trauma-dumping, and how she became her own glam squad.
Firstly, how is Hecate the magpie? I read that she escaped recently?!
She did! But she’s back safe and sound. What happened was, someone was staying with me and took delivery of her worms. The doors opened for a second, and she just flew out. I printed out hundreds of posters and put them up everywhere within three blocks of me. It transpired that she’d gone about a mile and a half away and she’d moved in with the most wonderful woman. A lady who runs the laundrette very near me knew her and had seen my posters, so that’s how we found her.
How did you know it was her and not another magpie?
Because she was trying to steal the lovely lady’s boyfriend and her alcohol — that’s my bird!
Are you sure Hecate is a girl? How can you tell?
I think she’s a girl. She’s so small — smaller than other magpies. But also, just the way that she loves men so much. She’s got Liz Taylor energy.
You mentioned on the show that you were a much better party hostess when you had staff. What’s the part of having help that you miss the most?
Oh, the cleaning! Particularly when you live with a magpie. The lovely lady that rescued Hecate is actually a cleaner, and she comes and helps me once a week — thank God. But even so, it’s just nonstop!
What’s your advice for hosting the perfect dinner party?
The guests are the most important ingredient. And then, buy the best alcohol you can afford to buy and get as much of it as you can afford to get. If people are forking out for a babysitter, don’t give them prosecco — it’s got to be Champagne.
What is your number-one friendship rule?
I think it’s so important in a friendship to be able to be honest with each other, but to do it with love. I’m neurodivergent, and I haven’t been accepted for being who I am for a lot of my life, so I try to accept people for who they are but then tell them if I feel that what they’ve done is wrong.
How do you approach ending a friendship?
I think, generally, I just let it fizzle out. I can only think of one friendship that I’ve ever deliberately ended. By the end of that friendship, I was so fed up. I just didn’t want to let that woman anywhere near me.
Are you a plan canceler?
If you’re going to cancel, you’ve got to do it the day before. If you’re going to cancel on the day, there’s got to be a real emergency. Someone’s got to be dying.
Are you a punctual person?
God no. If I’m within 15 minutes of when I’m due, then I’m on time!
Romantically, have you had anyone sliding into DMs after seeing you on TV?
Yes, quite a few! I’ve had a lot of invitations to go “the other way.” I tried it in school and several times in my life, but it’s not for me. I don’t like vag!
You’ve filmed some tough scenes on Ladies of London. Margo gave you some hard truths about giving a decorator the keys to your house without checking him out properly first. What was that like?
I think it’s so important as a friend to be able to receive that, as to be able to give it. Margo said those things because she cares about me. She knows me so well that she knew she had to get through to me, because I’m so good at laughing things off.
What actually happened with that man? How did that situation end?
So what happened was, Hecate had gone to stay with one of my friends, who is a really high-powered lawyer and can’t take much time off work. So I really needed the floor painted and for it to dry by the time she got back. Anyway, after I gave him the keys, he’d decided he wasn’t going to do the job after all. So I asked him to come pick up his stuff and drop off the keys. Then, when I got back from filming — the day we went to the wine tasting — all the shutters on my windows were shut. And I was like: That’s creepy. He’s waiting in there for me, isn’t he? So I said to my driver: “I’m just having a really creepy time with a painter. Would you mind coming in and just making sure he’s not waiting?” So we walk inside and we’re both really scared. When we’re checking he’s not upstairs, we hear a noise downstairs. I think he was hiding in my broom cupboard, so I called the police. And before they arrived, we heard the front door shut. And just as we were creeping down the stairs, we could see his hand pushing the keys back through the door! So I got the keys back, but of course I had the locks changed.
One of the debates from early in the season was from the winery day, when Missè shared the story of her brother’s murder. Kimi thought it was uncomfortable in that type of public setting. What did you think about that?
It’s probably not the “done thing” in the U.K. But I did end up sharing something sad about my life, too, because I wanted to make it feel more comfortable. Normally what we Brits do when we have a trauma is we make it into a funny story — and that’s not always the healthiest thing, either!
What is your glam routine?
I don’t often use a makeup artist because I am a makeup artist myself. I became so fascinated with makeup when I was modeling, because of how it can change the whole face — the shape, look and even the feel of an outfit with something as transient as makeup. I just find it constantly fascinating. I started following makeup artists around volunteering to wash their brushes if they’d let me watch them work. So I always do my own makeup — and also because I’ve got no money, darling!
You’ve got amazing teeth, are they real?
Thank you! Yes, they’re real. I had Invisalign, it was my 40th-birthday present to myself to keep them nice and straight.
Have you had any cosmetic work done?
I sometimes get Botox, but I prefer to get it in my neck, to keep it smooth, rather than my forehead. And if I’m feeling really miserable, I ask them to give me a little bit of Profhilo, which is an injectable hyaluronic acid treatment that boosts your collagen. It’s not a filler — it’s one of those things that stimulates. When I was rich I used a lot of filler, and I’m so glad I stopped being able to afford them, because I think they make you look older. But I’ve got absolutely no intention of aging gracefully. The minute I’ve got some money, I’m going for the full facelift!
What is the perfect vacation for Martha Sitwell?
I like to go to different places, and I like to explore. But having said that, there’s not many years where I haven’t ended up in Ibiza, even for a long weekend.
Every American I’ve spoken to about Ladies of London has asked me about you. Why do you think they’re so intrigued by you?
I have no idea, I think it’s because they keep comparing me to what’s her name …?
… Little Edie?
Yes! Little Edie. They keep comparing me to her, which is fabulous.
Why do you think people have connected with you so strongly on the show?
I think that people relate to the peaks and troughs that I’ve had in my life. A lot of people who message me are in a trough, and they’re saying, “You give me hope.” But then a lot of people have overcome that, and they’re saying, “Thank you for being so vulnerable with us.” I don’t think there’s any point in doing a show like this and trying to be someone else. This is me!
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