A question to working adults: Is giving your parents a monthly allowance the norm? It seems the answer isn’t as straightforward as you might think. 

A Reddittor recently posted this question: “At what age do you stop giving parents allowance? Supposing my parents can take care of themselves?”

The OP also wondered if those who are married and have their own place still give their parents an allowance.

Their reason for asking? “I am thinking of stopping as I have more bills, but I will still buy meals/groceries etc. for them. I am just wondering what is the [general] practice?” they explained. 

Singaporeans were quick to chime in with their opinions, and while views differed on whether one should give their parents money, most agreed that it ultimately depends on each person’s individual circumstances.

Those who do give their parents a regular allowance described it as a “token sum”, saying the amount isn’t as important as the thought behind it. For them, it’s a gesture of appreciation — a small way to show love and help with their parents’ non-essential expenses.

However, many others pointed out that such decisions hinge heavily on one’s financial situation and whether the parents actually need the support.

Several advised the OP to have an open and honest conversation with their parents before deciding.

“Do talk to your parents about this if you think they don’t need your money or you can’t afford to give them,” one commenter suggested.

Others shared creative alternatives to giving cash, such as bringing parents on annual overseas trips or treating them to regular family meals.

One netizen, who doesn’t give their parents an allowance, emphasised that time and presence matter more than money.

“Keep communication lines open and provide whatever material help they want. Time spent with parents, and listening to their concerns, matter far more than a token allowance they don’t need,” they wrote, adding that “different people express care in different ways.”

Ultimately, the consensus was that there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. Some parents make it clear they don’t need financial help, while others see it as a way for their children to fulfil filial duties.

“There’s no hard and fast rule,” said one netizen. “If you’re struggling financially, talk to your parents — they might even offer to help.”

Few parents, they reasoned, would insist on taking money from a child living paycheck to paycheck.

Some also took a more pragmatic stance, summing it up with: “You don’t have to stop if you never start.”

So… what’s your take?

Photos: AIII YOOOO, Jason Leung/ Unsplash