![](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/il\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/9141a7f58180f5d1d327a42e9db2c1e157-southerncharm-ep11.rsquare.w400.png\")
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Southern Charm<\/a><\/p>\n Cabin Fever<\/p>\n \n Season 11<\/p>\n Episode 11\n <\/p>\n \n Editor\u2019s Rating<\/p>\n 2 stars<\/p>\n **\n <\/p>\n \n Austen seems to be prioritizing literally anyone else over his friendship with Shep and Craig \u2014and for good reason. Hello, and welcome to Miss Patricia\u2019s Pet Cemetery. Here, you will see a collection of plaques for all of her departed pets, most of which have human names, a convention that has plagued the South at least since Reconstruction. There are Lily and Toby, Ashley and Rhett, Rocky and Nyla. And of course, my favorite, a cat named Kitty Kelley, presumably after the author of salacious unauthorized biographies about Jackie Kennedy, Nancy Regan, and Frank Sinatra. (Everyone who knows Miss Pat knows she still isn\u2019t over that thing Nancy said about her at a cotillion back in 1977.) Now we are here to lay our beloved pug, Chauncey, to rest. If you can, please keep quiet and your photos to a minimum. We\u2019ll now hear a eulogy from Austen Kroll, who was not a member of Chauncey\u2019s immediate family, but they had a lot in common, like licking faces, soiling couches, and exceeding people\u2019s expectations. Over to you, Austen: \u201cHe was a couch warmer, a confidant, a snack stealer, a friend. And those who knew him knew that what he lacked in brain power, he really made up for in spirit.\u201d Thank you, Austen, that was both touching and funny. That concludes our tour of Miss Patricia\u2019s Pet Cemetery. If you want to go inside the Stabin\u2019 Cabin, we have a special exhibit on her son Whitney Sudler-Smith\u2019s collection of rare guitars and matchbooks from bordellos around the world. Enjoy the rest of your stay.<\/p>\n Wasn\u2019t that a wonderful tour and a fitting good-bye for our dear Chauncey, which happened at the end of the episode. Curiously, it was also when the episode ran the end credits, not during the final scene where Madison calls Venita to say that she is giving birth to her baby the next day. Were they afraid of putting the second AD\u2019s name next to Madison\u2019s big announcement? Anyway, the timing makes you wonder, is Madison\u2019s daughter the reincarnation of Chauncey the dog, much like Trisha Paytas\u2019s child is the reincarnation of Queen Elizabeth<\/a>? Even if it\u2019s not, it really makes you think about the cycle of life and death, how there are always people coming in and out of our lives, kind of like one great big reality show.<\/p>\n Honestly, those two things at the very end of the episode are the most interesting things to happen in the whole hour, as the only storylines we have to follow are Austen\u2019s continued annoyance with both Shep and Craig; the love rhombus between Salley, Charley, Craig, and Austen; Venita and Salley being the best of frenemies; and why no one will date Whitner. Okay, the last one is more of a mystery than a storyline, but we shall see. Also, why can\u2019t he and Molly just fall in love and get married and have a ton of Itchy Grass Babies? It\u2019s what the fans want! Do it for us!<\/p>\n As for the trouble with Austen, Shep, and Craig, we get our first glimmer of it at the big dinner party that Whitner\u2019s delightful parents throw. They play a game at dinner where there is a question under everyone\u2019s plates, and they have to answer, which is apparently a family tradition. The game is honestly a bit of a flop. Has the Slagsvol family never heard of the hit party game, \u201cWho Do You Trust Least Around This Table?\u201d Always a guaranteed banger. Anyway, when Austen leaves the table to go to the restroom, Charley tells Craig that he needs to fix their friendship and tells Craig that Austen\u2019s going through a breakup. Craig\u2019s eyes bulge out of his head like he\u2019s an extra in Who Framed Roger Rabbit and asks, \u201cWhat?!?!?!\u201d He\u2019s shocked that he doesn\u2019t know that Austen is broken up, even though neither he nor Shep has made it easy for him to talk to them about it. Charley tells Craig that everyone knows, which seems to make it worse.<\/p>\n After dinner, Shep sits Austen down to have a chat about his relationship because he wants to give him some advice. Madison tells him, instead of scolding Austen about his indecision, that he should ask questions and get Austen to open up. Shep, of course, ignores all of this and basically just tells him he needs to break up with his girlfriend. Austen tells Shep he doesn\u2019t want to talk about it. Shep thinks that he\u2019s being evasive, continuing to avoid a decision. He coaches Austen to be vulnerable. Then Austen tells him that he has been vulnerable, just not with him. He\u2019s talked all about it to Rodrigo and Madison, a pair that I would trust to solve literally any problem: girlfriend issues, what to wear to a semi-formal event, the affordability crisis, how to get Gallery Girls back on television, and the collapse in the bee population.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not until the next day, when Shep, Austen, and Rodrigo go fishing in the umpteenth adorable little shack we\u2019ve seen on Whit\u2019s family farm, that Austen finally tells Shep that, yes, he did break up with Audrey. Of course, neither Shep nor Austen can bait the hook because they hate touching the worm, a problem that my man Rodrigo certainly doesn\u2019t have. That man really can touch a worm. But it\u2019s Austen who caught the only fish, prompting Shep to make a joke about \u201ccatch and release,\u201d which then becomes about how Austen always talks about releasing his girlfriend but won\u2019t do it. Austen should have known this was coming, that by not answering Shep\u2019s questions about it, he would be hounded. But I also get his motivation. Shep and Craig wouldn\u2019t have consoled him or applauded him on finally making a tough decision; it would be a chorus of, \u201cI told you so,\u201d and, \u201cWhy did you wait so long?\u201d and who wants to hear that when fresh off a breakup. It seems like Austen is prioritizing other friendships over these two clowns, who are about as good at giving relationship advice as Diane Warren is at winning Oscars<\/a>.<\/p>\n On to the love-rhombus! Things are going well for Charley and Craig, who had a cute date out in a canoe while everyone else traveled around the farm and fought about their friendships. Salley and her extra E still aren\u2019t quite over Craig, but she\u2019s really trying hard to get under Austen. At dinner, Austen tells a story about stripping naked in a bar as a 20-something and she can\u2019t help but interject that she wants to see him naked. When he gets up from the table at dinner to go pee, she asks him, \u201cDo you need any help?\u201d Finally, Austen has to say, \u201cDown girl,\u201d because, like loving cupcakes, it\u2019s so obvious as to be annoying. And even still, Salley is like, \u201cI want Austen\u2019s dick.\u201d Yes. We get it.<\/p>\n Salley has a lot going on with Venita though, which, honestly, is a fight I don\u2019t understand. They have a talk in Whitner\u2019s pool house with Molly and Whitner as witnesses, and Salley is still pissed that Venita tried to start shit between Molly and Salley. I don\u2019t know guys. It seems like Salley is just salty that Venita was right about Craig and is holding onto this slight for ammunition. Venita already apologized to Molly about talking about her vagina prettying surgery (that is the medical term) and Molly has accepted that apology. Venita apologizes again here, but it seems like Salley is willfully choosing not to get over this to be mad at Venita.<\/p>\n That\u2019s not to say that Venita behaved well in this discussion. When trying to explain herself, Venita tries to show the difference between herself and Salley and Whitner inserts himself into the conversation and says, \u201cWhy is that an important distinction?\u201d Venita turns nasty at the drop of one of the dopey hats that either Austen or Shep was wearing at the party the night before. She tells Whitner to \u201cshut the fuck up,\u201d and he has nothing to do with this. Whitner points out that he was just trying to defend Molly, who he is clearly in love with and should marry. (I\u2019m not giving up on this until it happens. Sorry.) It was an outsized reaction from Venita who should have either welcomed Whitner into the conversation, ignored his comment, or found a nicer way to tell him to butt out.<\/p>\n However, Salley then says that Venita was trying to \u201cpin\u201d her and Molly against each other, which is not the term, and then Venita gets teary and storms off. Salley calls after her, saying that Venita is always walking away, and she\u2019s right. Venita needs to stay and finish one of these conversations. She needs to get snotty and snarly and cry-y and let all of the emotions out on Salley if not only for her own catharsis but also so that they (and us) can move on from the fight. But she doesn\u2019t. Venita, in her Daisy Dukes, walks off into the itchy grass, hoping that her problems won\u2019t follow her. But that\u2019s the thing, they always do. Even when you escape the confrontation, even when you put those tough discussions off until the next day, as Austen did, they\u2019ll always be there waiting, with their snarled heads and their rotted teeth just getting worse and uglier by the day.<\/p>\n Sign up for the Housewives Institute Bulletin<\/p>\n Dame Brian Moylan breaks down all the gossip and drama, on- and off-screen, for dedicated students of the Reality Television Arts and Sciences.<\/p>\n Vox Media, LLC Terms and Privacy Notice<\/p>\n
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