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Parents trying to balance raising happy children while also preparing for retirement are increasingly grappling with difficult financial tradeoffs, especially when it comes to choosing between saving for the future and paying for meaningful family experiences and activities.

One such parent, who said they were in their late 30s with two young children, shared on Reddit that retirement contributions had been reduced to the minimum employer match so the family could focus on vacations, swim lessons, 529 college savings plans and other childhood experiences.

“We are basically all in on our children having the best childhood memories as possible,” the parent wrote.

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Many Parents Said Retirement Has To Come First

Many commenters quickly pushed back on the idea of sacrificing retirement savings too heavily for experiences during childhood.

Often repeated throughout the discussion was that children can borrow money for college, but parents can’t borrow money for retirement.

“Not becoming a burden on adult kids in retirement is the best gift possible,” the original poster later acknowledged after reading through the responses.

Commenters shared personal experiences helping aging parents who failed to save enough for retirement. Some described paying for housing, assisted living, funeral costs or covering basic bills for elderly parents later in life.

“People will be happy to loan your kids college money,” one person wrote. “No one is loaning you money to die comfortably.”

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Others argued that many expensive childhood experiences aren’t nearly as important to children as parents sometimes assume. Camping trips, board games, bike rides and simply spending time together came up repeatedly as examples of memories kids often cherish more than costly vacations.

“We’ve spent thousands taking them to Europe,” one parent wrote. “They still remember more fondly the times we camped for 35 bucks a night.”

“Time spent with kids is the best gift,” another commenter added.

Several parents also warned against trying to “catch up” on retirement savings later in life. They said waiting too long to save for retirement can make it much harder for your money to grow over time.

On the other side, not everyone believed parents should aggressively prioritize retirement at the expense of family experiences.

Some commenters said childhood goes by quickly and argued there is value in spending money on travel, activities and shared experiences while children are young.

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One parent said they intentionally worked less and spent more time with their kids, even if it meant saving less for retirement in earlier years.

“We traveled a lot and made lots of great memories,” the commenter wrote. “Best of all, our kids are happy and we have a great relationship with them. I wouldn’t change a thing for a larger 401(k) balance.”

Still, even many of those commenters emphasized moderation. Parents discussed choosing cheaper vacations, buying used cars, limiting expensive extracurriculars and avoiding lifestyle inflation.

In response to the answers to their post, the parent said the thread had been “eye opening” and confirmed they planned to shift priorities more toward retirement savings moving forward.

“I guess I just needed to hear the obvious,” the parent wrote, “to spend time with them as much as possible and to make sure not to become a burden when they are adults.”

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This article Parents Wonder How Much To Spend On Childhood Memories Vs. Retirement Savings. Some Say Not Becoming A Burden Later Is ‘The Best Gift Possible’ originally appeared on Benzinga.com

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