Over the years, I’ve developed a level of attachment to Olivia Rodrigo’s first two albums—2021’s Sour and 2023’s Guts—that feels a little dissonant, given that I am almost 33 years of age and Rodrigo’s debut came out when she was quite literally 18. Maybe it’s a classic case of arrested development, but nothing has ever felt more healing than screaming along to “Good 4 U” as I drove around Austin after a breakup five years ago, and if I’m being honest, I still play “Bad Idea Right?” pretty much every time I send a text that I probably shouldn’t.

So how does Rodrigo’s third studio album, You Seem Pretty Sad for a Girl So in Love, stand up to its predecessors? Below, quite literally every thought I had during my inaugural listen.

Oh, the tiny, Gen Z-pink font opening the video for “Drop Dead”!Or is Rodrigo actually some younger-than-Gen-Z micro-generation I’m too old and chopped to even have heard of?Where in America do bars close at 11 p.m.?College towns, I guess.I love Rodrigo’s synth-pop era.Not to mention her triumphant revival of the babydoll dress, about which I will hear no evil.If more pop stars referenced Hole-era Courtney Love, I genuinely believe this world would be a better place.A Pisces and a Gemini…IDK about that one, diva.Then again, I am a Cancer who dated a Virgo for almost four years, so what do I know?Emerging from a basement apartment in a hoodie with the hood up…that’s so New York.I love when Rodrigo gets sad about how cool other women are, because there’s no trace of pick-me-ism in her complaints…they’re just relatable.It’s all so very Jolene!Balletcore plus pajamas is very Lily-Rose Depp and 070 Shake to me.Why no video for “Honeybee”?…yet, I suppose.Eh, not wild about this track.Okay, I’m back in on “Maggots for Brains.”I simply cannot wait to blast this one in my car at a neighbor-angering volume as I pull out of my garage.“I’m a zombie in my body”…well, exactly!Letting-fruit-go-moldy-in-your-fridge-due-to-depression representation in these lyrics.For that matter, I need to hurry up and finish this story so I can go puree and freeze the pound of strawberries in my fridge before they officially turn on me.Loving the opening riff of “U+Me=<3”Also, glad to know the <3 emoticon lives on with the younger generation!Rodrigo is so right about Cadbury being the most romantic candy.Hear me out: American candy is too sugary, Swiss chocolate is too fancy…British treats are where it’s at.This song is sort of giving P.S. Eliot in a way I adore.Am I deeply washed for hoping that “My Way” would be a cover of the Frank Sinatra song?We need to simply say “You’re being fucking weird” to our opps more often, even if it’s in the middle of a pop song.“Purple” also not doing it for me, sorry.“The Cure” shares musical DNA with “Pretty Girls”” by Reneé Rapp, albeit with less lesbian subtext.This cutesy syringe graphic…“Used to play a game in my head when I’d date a guy / Tally up the girls that he fucked ’til I start to cry.”An eminently relatable diva!Damn, Rodrigo looks insanely beautiful in an old-timey nurse’s outfit.This shot of what looks like Twizzlers coming out of her fingers…cool yet weird.Okay, here for the low-energy banger that is “Begged.”“What’s Wrong With Me” is inexplicably making my dog howl.Are there siren sounds in it I’m not hearing?All right, “Less” is too low-energy.Ooh, “Expectations” won me back.So ’80s-movie-soundtrack!“I won’t settle for a guy with a fake job”…from your lips to God’s ears, Liv.I was literally about to write “This song is clearly written by a woman who’s been dating men in LA,” and then Rodrigo sang: “Don’t think my future husband’s at this bar in Silver Lake.”You said it, sister.Okay, this high-dating-expectations anthem officially rocks.“Cigarette Smoke” is just okay to me.Overall, I’d have to say my top plays on You Seem Pretty Sad for a Girl So in Love are “Expectations” and “Maggots for Brains.”Not quite a total slay of a third album, but…I love it anyway!