City slickers can antagonise wh\u0101nau when they head home for the break \u2013 often without any idea they\u2019re being a dick. Here\u2019s how to ensure you get back from the holidays safe in the knowledge you\u2019re a damn good townie.<\/p>\n
Summer in the regions is a beautiful thing: wh\u0101nau everywhere, endless kai on the table, babies roaming freely, cuzzies arguing about who ties the best knots, and someone always snoring on the couch at 3pm. But for every wholesome memory, there\u2019s also that relative who rolls up unprepared, acts like they\u2019re still in town, and single-handedly causes a small logistical crisis at the local shop.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t be that guy.<\/p>\n
Follow this guide. Keep your dignity. Keep the aroha of your wh\u0101nau. And keep the holiday vibes from turning into a full court hearing.<\/p>\n
Fill your tank or charge your electric car before you leave the city<\/p>\n
And before you leave the last big town closest to your final destination, too. Nothing says \u201cI\u2019ve been away too long\u201d like arriving with the fuel light on. Small-town petrol stations close early, or randomly, or whenever Aunty has to pick up her mokos. Many rural areas won\u2019t even have a charging station. If you want to be extra prepared, fill up a jerry can with some gas and leave it in the back \u2013 if you don\u2019t end up needing it, there will almost always be a fellow townie that will.<\/p>\n
Carry some cash \u2013 real, physical, old-school dollar bills<\/p>\n
Koha at the hui. Koha for the gas you forgot because you didn\u2019t read the first tip. Koha for your uncle\u2019s fishing tackle you lost. Koha for the local who towed you out. Roadside h\u0101ng\u012b or smoked fish. Aunties selling their chutneys at the local market. The tinny you weren\u2019t going to buy. Cash is still a thing, especially in small towns where the internet can be unreliable. Carry some with you at all times and you won\u2019t need to worry about climbing to the top of the maunga to find some signal for a bank transfer.<\/p>\n
Cash is king (Image: Archi Banal)<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t turn up with big-city energy and no supplies<\/p>\n
If you smoke or drink, bring your own. Don\u2019t roll up in your mean truck and then try to bum a ciggie or beer. Showing up hungry is fine. Showing up hungry with nothing to contribute is how you get talked about for the next year. If you eat, bring some food, or at least something to trade. You\u2019ll be welcomed back with open arms each and every time.<\/p>\n
Ice is currency \u2013 secure it early<\/p>\n
By the time Boxing Day rolls around, every supermarket, gas station, and dairy will be out of ice, or on their last bags. If you see ice, treat it like gold: buy it, hide it, protect it from drunk relatives. One bag for the chilly bin, one secretly stashed in the back of the freezer. Trust no one.<\/p>\n
If you\u2019re planning to fish, dive, or hunt, come correct
This isn\u2019t a Warriors training camp \u2013 no one has extra gear to loan you, time to babysit you, or untangle the bird\u2019s nest you call a cast. Bring your own equipment. Respect the locals. I get that it\u2019s been ages since you had a fat kina or creamed p\u0101ua that didn\u2019t cost $20, but your uncle\u2019s secret possie isn\u2019t your own personal buffet. Only take what you need, and there\u2019ll always be some whenever you go back. If there\u2019s a r\u0101hui, respect it. Share your catch with the wh\u0101nau. If you\u2019re going for a dive, know your limits and always respect Tangaroa.<\/p>\n
Drive like you\u2019ve met a rural road before
City drivers: this is your annual reminder that open roads, gravel, one-lane bridges, and soft sand do not care about your confidence. Slow down. Don\u2019t tailgate Nana in her Corolla. Do NOT fang it down the beach like you\u2019re auditioning for the Fast & Furious: Te Tai Tokerau Drift. Locals know the roads, you don\u2019t. Take it easy, don\u2019t drink and drive, and you\u2019ll make it home safe.<\/p>\n
Take your rubbish with you
Your nan didn\u2019t spend her life keeping the whenua pristine just so you could leave your empty V can blowing down the dunes like a tumbleweed. Take your rubbish with you, and don\u2019t leave it at Uncle\u2019s house to deal with. Drop it at the tip or recycling centre and pay for it yourself.<\/p>\n
Don\u2019t be a hua, take your rubbish home. (Photo: Getty Images)<\/p>\n
Swim between the flags \u2013 or if there are no flags, don\u2019t be a hero<\/p>\n
Regional beaches are stunning, but ruthless. If the surf looks too big, stick to the creek, the rock pools, or the shallows where the tamariki are splashing. Tangaroa is indiscriminate and has no mercy. Better to be safe than on the six o\u2019clock news.<\/p>\n
Respect the house, respect the whenua, respect the vibe<\/p>\n
You\u2019re home, but you\u2019re also a guest. Help with dishes. Don\u2019t hog the shower (especially if it\u2019s on tank water). Don\u2019t leave your stuff lying around. Say thank you. Check on the kaum\u0101tua. Give the dog a bone. Summer is about being together \u2013 not creating extra admin for your wh\u0101nau.<\/p>\n
Bring patience. Lots of it.<\/p>\n
Small towns run on holiday hours, delayed relatives, random reunions and weather that changes every 20 minutes. Take a breath. Relax. You\u2019re on holiday.<\/p>\n
And finally: have fun \u2013 but don\u2019t forget where you are<\/p>\n
The regions aren\u2019t a backdrop for your Instagram story. They\u2019re home \u2013 to you, to your wh\u0101nau, to people who live there all year.<\/p>\n
Treat the place with aroha and respect, and you\u2019ll be welcomed back every summer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"City slickers can antagonise wh\u0101nau when they head home for the break \u2013 often without any idea they\u2019re…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":192650,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[26380,156,119901,111,139,69,119902,2935,14625,119903,119904],"class_list":["post-192649","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-entertainment","tag-atea","tag-entertainment","tag-etiquette","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-nz","tag-road-trips","tag-society","tag-summer","tag-the-regions","tag-the-spinoff-guide-to-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/192649","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=192649"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/192649\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/192650"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=192649"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=192649"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=192649"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}