\u201cI was just feeling really stuck, really flat,\u201d she says of deciding to attend her first retreat, in 2018, in a remote part of Sri Lanka.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou know when you\u2019re in a bit of a funk with life? I felt like I needed to really disrupt things.\u201d<\/p>\n
One of Vipassana\u2019s key lessons<\/a>, taken from Buddhism, is to ground yourself in the present moment by observing your bodily sensations. This then forms the basis for a blanket of impenetrable equanimity. <\/p>\n \u201cI came out of it and just felt like I was seeing life through a brighter coloured filter. I felt like in a bubble or a cloud,\u201d says Croft, who splits her time between Europe and New Zealand. <\/p>\n \u201cI had a lot more peace and calmness. I could notice things around me – even moments that might normally trigger a reaction – but instead of being pulled into them, I was able to observe them and choose not to react.\u201d<\/p>\n It was one of the most challenging things she\u2019d ever done, she said.<\/p>\n \u201cBut it\u2019s also the thing that\u2019s probably had the biggest influence on my life, the biggest shift. It gave me a sense that I\u2019d taken control of my life again, instead of being carried along by everything around me.\u201d<\/p>\n Croft might not be where she is today – at the peak of her sport – without these life experiences. Her recovery from bulimia has allowed her to fuel her body properly to meet the physical endurance demands of her sport, while meditation has helped train her mind to cope with the mental challenges.<\/p>\n There\u2019s tension between Vipassana\u2019s zen and Croft\u2019s self-described super-competitiveness, but that doesn\u2019t mean the former can\u2019t be useful when the going gets tough in her ultra races.<\/p>\n \u201cVipassana teaches you equanimity under stressful situations. Ultrarunning is a manufactured stressful situation. You volunteer for it; it\u2019s not like I\u2019m held at gunpoint,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n \u201cWhen an ultra gets hard, I always had a lot of resistance towards the state of suffering. But now I just bring my awareness to the sensations in my body. I\u2019m no longer fighting it.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s given me the ability to move through that with a lot more ease.\u201d<\/p>\n The world\u2019s biggest trail race<\/p>\n It\u2019s a travesty to any New Zealander with an interest in running that Croft wasn\u2019t nominated for sportswoman of the year for 2025<\/a>, a sign perhaps that her speciality remains a niche sport.<\/p>\n She won four ultra-trail races out of five starts last year, failing to finish one due to hypothermia<\/a>, though this would provide an invaluable lesson.<\/p>\n Among the victories was the sport\u2019s holy grail<\/a>. The sheer numbers involved with the UTMB boggle the mind: 174km is longer than doing the Milford Track three times, while 10,000m of vertical elevation is higher than thrice going from Mt Cook village to the summit of Aoraki.<\/p>\n The event is also renowned for its unique mountain landscapes, and a fanfare that borders on pandemonium. The start and finish lines in Chamonix, France – as well as the surrounding townships – are packed with thousands of supporters hooting and hollering their unwavering, energetic support.<\/p>\n Croft contested it for the first time in 2024, finishing second without completely emptying her tank, as she describes it – if that\u2019s even possible after nearly 23 hours of running. <\/p>\n Her victory last year<\/a> made her the first woman to win all three UTMB races, including the 55km OCC and the 100km CCC,<\/a> an achievement that took a decade to complete.<\/p>\n Croft was confident in last year\u2019s lead-up. She was physically strong, having had a training programme of power-hiking uphill with increasingly heavier packs, among other things.<\/p>\n On her second rodeo, she didn\u2019t have to second-guess certain logistics, such as nutrition; she consumed an average of 90g of carbs an hour, which translates to about 360 calories, or over 8000 calories for the whole race (roughly four times the average adult\u2019s daily needs).<\/p>\n Her strategy was to pace herself according to a series of splits for each section of the course, going harder and earlier than in 2024 so she\u2019d finish with an empty tank. <\/p>\n But foul weather descended, exposing the runners to freezing temperatures, and at times ferocious wind and rain. Learning from her hypothermic DNF, she switched her focus to staying warm through the night.<\/p>\n She was third for much of the first half of the course, but as the sun rose and the weather settled the following morning, she drew closer to Dauwalter, in the lead. When she eventually took the lead, with a mere 60km to go, Dauwalter turned to her with an encouraging cry of \u201clet\u2019s go!\u201d<\/p>\n The suffering caught up with Croft as she was trying to hold off her chasers in the latter part of the race. Part of what helped her through was her mental fortitude, built up over several years of Vipassana. <\/p>\n It was pre-dawn in New Zealand as Croft came down the home stretch, on a sunny afternoon in France. With the finish line just around the corner, she provided a moment of comic delight when she stopped to embrace three of her friends in full T-Rex costumes. <\/p>\n They\u2019d been present throughout the course, cheering her on in different locations as she moved relentlessly onwards. They\u2019re also a trademark of her support crew; a trio of T-Rexes had accompanied her across the finish line of the 100-mile Western States race, when she won in 2022<\/a>.<\/p>\n And it\u2019s her support she singles out – especially her partner Martin Gaffuri, who crewed her in the race – when she reflects on what\u2019s memorable from her UTMB triumph.<\/p>\n \u201cWhen I\u2019m on my deathbed, am I going to be thinking about that moment, winning the UTMB? Definitely not. What sticks for me is those interactions, those moments with friends and family. That\u2019s more important.\u201d<\/p>\n This also speaks to her maturing relationship with the sport: from an unhealthy obsession to something she\u2019s passionate about, but that isn\u2019t her life, nor does it define her.<\/p>\n \u201cRunning was everything, when I was younger. A lot of my self-worth was tied up with it. If running was going well, I was better to be around. But when I was injured, I turned into this horrible person,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n \u201cI used to get super nervous when I was younger. Now race day, for me, is exciting. I enjoy it. I don\u2019t get worked up. I don\u2019t get nervous. I\u2019m always just focusing on myself and doing what I need to do at that time.<\/p>\n \u201cI have a relationship now where I love what I do, but it\u2019s also just a race. I don\u2019t need it to be a good person. What matters is how you show up for your friends and family, and leading with love and compassion.\u201d<\/p>\n From the West Coast to the US to Taipei<\/p>\n Croft, 37, was a gifted runner from a young age. <\/p>\n She grew up in Stillwater, inland from Greymouth with a population of fewer than 100, and went to boarding school in Christchurch, when she represented New Zealand in athletics and cross country.<\/p>\n This led to an athletics scholarship at the University of Portland, in the US, but it was there her body started breaking down, following years of bulimia and RED-S (Relative Energy Deficiency in Sport).<\/p>\n RED-S is not uncommon among elite athletes. If you\u2019re lighter, then the same amount of power and strength will make you go faster and further. But if you aren\u2019t fuelling yourself with enough calories and nutrition, there can be longer-term impacts on, for example, bone health.<\/p>\n \u201cI had pretty much four years of stress fractures,\u201d Croft says.<\/p>\n Injured and with her racing mojo depleted, she gave up running and moved to Taipei, Taiwan, to a job teaching English. <\/p>\n The bustling city with more than 2 million people was a stark contrast to Stillwater.<\/p>\n \u201cIt was just so different to everything I knew growing up on the West Coast. I loved it. Everything was so new.\u201d<\/p>\n She stayed for more than five years, eventually returning to running as a way to get healthy again after too much partying. <\/p>\n But her running mojo also returned, and she started travelling around Asia for mountain-running races. In 2014, she won one of the first ultra trail races she entered – a 50km event with 3200m in vertical elevation.<\/p>\n The following year, she won the UTMB\u2019s 100km CCC race, and by the time she returned to New Zealand, in 2017, she had a few sponsors backing her to compete on the world\u2019s ultra circuit. <\/p>\n In 2018, when she also had her first Vipassana experience, she won her first 55km OCC title in Chamonix, and then her second the following year<\/a>. <\/p>\n This was also around the time she had enough sponsorship support to run fulltime, allowing her to drop her various jobs, for example as a cleaner or laundry van driver.<\/p>\n It was a life she\u2019d never even dared to dream of, having worked since she was 10, when she started helping at the family trucking company.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve always worked. I never envisioned that I would get paid to run fulltime. I never envisioned the life I have now.\u201d<\/p>\n \u2018A deep reset of the nervous system\u2019<\/p>\n An essential part of that life is a regular pilgrimage to a Vipassana centre. <\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s a deep reset of your whole nervous system. It gives me a moment to strip away all the distractions and reflect on what\u2019s important. <\/p>\n \u201cThat feeling does slowly fade, so I go back every year.\u201d<\/p>\n Croft has even dabbled in darkness meditation: confined to a room totally void of any light for 10 days, interrupted only twice a day for a smoothie to be delivered.<\/p>\n The prolonged period of darkness can stimulate visions. During her time, Croft saw flashing lights, herself sitting in a cave, and in a cathedral.<\/p>\n When she emerged, she lacked the lightness that Vipassana usually gives her.<\/p>\n \u201cBut, again, it\u2019s the things that are important in life that come forward. It\u2019s a necessary grounding. It\u2019s really important that we have space to reflect on how we\u2019re moving through the world.\u201d<\/p>\n She is studying naturopathy to prepare for a life after running, but for now she\u2019s at the peak of her ultra powers, having been injury-free for eight years, her bulimia-related troubles well behind her. <\/p>\nA triumphant Ruth Croft at the UTMB finish line last year. Photo \/ UTMB<\/p>\n
Ruth Croft cheered on by her T-Rex supporters during last year’s UTMB, the world’s biggest ultra trail race, which she won for the first time. Photo \/ Jess Meniere<\/p>\n
Ruth Croft at the Tarawera Ultramarathon in Rotorua. Photo \/ File<\/p>\n
Ruth Croft at the finish line in 2022 after winning the Western States 100.2-mile (161km) race, just ahead of her trio of T-Rex supporters. Photo \/ Scott Rokis.<\/p>\n