While she was refused permanent name suppression, she was allowed to keep her name secret until after she gave birth. <\/p>\n
The boy\u2019s parents spoke to the Herald about the case and their fury at her name being kept secret for so long.<\/p>\n
Tamlyn May before her arrest for child sex offending. Photo \/ Supplied<\/p>\n
\u201cI want parents to know that predators can come in any sex, any shape or size – in this case, it was a pretty little blonde thing with a lanyard round her neck who groomed us, and had the school fooled,\u201d said the boy\u2019s mother. <\/p>\n
\u201cPredators don\u2019t have to be a creepy man in a van giving you sweets and asking you to see puppies, which is the stereotype. It can be a coach, a teacher, anyone.\u201d<\/p>\n
The boy\u2019s father said they were \u201cscared\u201d to speak publicly, but felt compelled to raise awareness and alert other parents.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019re scared, but there is a greater purpose here. If we can stop it from happening again, that\u2019s for the greater good.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe just want to warn parents.\u201d<\/p>\n
What\u2019s wrong with our \u2018loveable\u2019 boy?<\/p>\n
He was a cheeky 11-year-old. Mischievous, but never naughty.<\/p>\n
And then he started bullying other kids.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was getting called into school every other week because he was bullying people. He\u2019d never been like that – he\u2019s always been such a lovely, cuddly, compassionate, empathetic kid,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt was getting worse and worse and worse. To cut a hell of a long story short, basically, he got stood down from school for the second time after a serious incident.\u201d <\/p>\n
Tamlyn May in court for sentencing. Her name was suppressed at the time. Photo \/ Sylvie Whinray<\/p>\n
The Herald cannot report the details as it may identify the boy.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe were really worried about his mental health. He was fine at home but not at school.\u201d<\/p>\n
The parents were so concerned that they sought help from their local child and youth mental health service.<\/p>\n
May became involved, and the boy\u2019s parents believed she was helping them. <\/p>\n
He was not letting any family attend his sports games, but would allow May to go and watch. <\/p>\n
\u201cWe thought, great, she\u2019s helping him with his mental health \u2013 but all the while she was destroying his mental health,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe would be at the park, and she would be there, and we would allow him to go for a walk up the beach with her. It wasn\u2019t as if we weren\u2019t there.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe was into fitness, and they\u2019d go for runs and stuff like that. We allowed it because he came back so happy, and to see a mentally battered child happy made us happy. <\/p>\n
\u201cAnd she was his teacher.\u201d<\/p>\n
In mid-2024, the boy told his father he\u2019d forgotten the code to unlock his phone. <\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve done a recovery, and all of a sudden I get this alert saying someone had logged into his Gmail account,\u201d the father explained.<\/p>\n
May was sending the boy nude photos as she groomed him. Photo \/ Getty Images<\/p>\n
\u201cYou can see the device that\u2019s logged on, what WiFi network it\u2019s on \u2026 I saw it was the school, and I recognised her device. I phoned the school and told them.<\/p>\n
\u201cThen his mum phoned and said, \u2018Get him off his f***ing laptop now.\u2019 She never swears \u2026 so I went and got the laptop and took it into the bedroom and said to her, \u2018What\u2019s going on?\u2019<\/p>\n
\u201cShe sent me pictures \u2026 the teacher was using a live Google document and typing sick stuff to him, and then as soon as he answered, she was deleting her questions.<\/p>\n
\u201cLuckily, his mum was taking screenshots of it all. And that\u2019s how we found out.\u201d<\/p>\n
The father took his son to his mother\u2019s, then went to the school and the police.<\/p>\n
\u201cThis person begged me not to go to the police because it would ruin her teaching career. When she found out I was going to the police station, she sent me and [the boy\u2019s] mum a message saying she was going to kill herself.<\/p>\n
\u201cI told the police: you make sure that selfish b**** can\u2019t do it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Parents infuriated by bail, secrecy<\/p>\n
May appeared in court for the first time in September 2024 and pleaded guilty to the charges in November.<\/p>\n
While awaiting sentencing, she was on bail, at one stage even travelling overseas, which angered the boy\u2019s parents.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve bumped into her \u2026 I\u2019ve been sitting at a bar and she\u2019s walked in,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd there\u2019s been two or three times when I\u2019ve had my boy with me and I\u2019ve had to change my entire day because she\u2019s at the same place. <\/p>\n
May was sentenced last year in the North Shore District Court. Photo \/ Sylvie Whinray<\/p>\n
\u201cWe have to change, and she carries on with her day. And we can\u2019t get a protection order and we haven\u2019t been able to trespass her from places we go because of the name suppression. <\/p>\n
\u201cIf she was a family member, I could get a protection order out that means she can\u2019t come anywhere near us if she sees us in public. But there are holes in the law that basically do not protect us. <\/p>\n
\u201cAnd it\u2019s not, it\u2019s not like she\u2019s awaiting trial, right, and she\u2019s innocent until proven guilty. She\u2019s pleaded guilty, she\u2019s admitted it. And she\u2019s been out all that time, all through the summer holidays, the Easter holiday \u2026 she\u2019s been out in places where other children are, and she\u2019s a convicted sex offender.”<\/p>\n
A new law that went into effect late last year requires consent from the victim for a person convicted of a sexual offence to receive permanent name suppression. <\/p>\n
But May was exempt from that law because of the timing of her charges and sentencing.<\/p>\n
At her sentencing, her lawyer, David Jones, KC, claimed she had been suffering a psychological issue in which she saw herself, as if in virtual reality, as a fellow 11-year-old.<\/p>\n
It stemmed from trauma in her childhood, he said, describing the situation as \u201ctrauma-bonding\u201d.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019re not talking about some sort of predatory behaviour or prurient interest,\u201d Jones told the court. <\/p>\n
\u201cShe had a real interest in helping young people with behavioural issues. And she was of the same ilk. She would regress back to the age where she was 11.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u2018It\u2019s been scary – but we\u2019ve got our boy back\u2019 <\/p>\n
Since May\u2019s secret was exposed, the boy is doing much better.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s great. I\u2019m just happy that we\u2019ve got our son back and he\u2019s our cuddly, empathetic boy,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ve got him back, and we\u2019re getting him help. He is a very level-headed, normal 11-year-old. We\u2019ve tried hard to keep things as normal as possible, and we\u2019ve been truthful with him right the way through.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut it\u2019s been scary.\u201d<\/p>\n
The 11-year-old was having issues at school and his parents thought May was supporting and helping him. But she was grooming and abusing him.<\/p>\n
The boy was not interested in what happened to May, as long as he never had to see her again.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe said, \u2018I hate her \u2026 I don\u2019t care\u2019,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n
The father read a victim impact statement in court, in which he called May a \u201cnarcissist\u201d and said he did not believe she was sorry or remorseful.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe only reason she pleaded guilty was that her lawyer couldn\u2019t defend her because the evidence we had was so watertight. <\/p>\n
\u201cI think she\u2019s tried to get a lesser sentence \u2026 she\u2019s a narcissist, she\u2019s self-centred.\u201d<\/p>\n
He firmly opposed May\u2019s name suppression from the outset. <\/p>\n
\u201cI think it sucks that somebody can go incognito for the rest of their life being a predator.<\/p>\n
\u201cPeople need to know who she is and what she has done \u2026 [female teachers sexually abusing pupils] is something so unheard of in New Zealand, and we want to get our story out there to open people\u2019s eyes.\u201d<\/p>\n
He felt a lot of guilt about what happened because he had allowed May access to his son. <\/p>\n
\u201cWe have come to terms with it now \u2026 At first, we hated ourselves because we were like, why didn\u2019t we see it? Because once it does come to light, it\u2019s like, \u2018My God, how stupid have we been?\u2019<\/p>\n
\u201cBut she\u2019s clever. And this is why the offending needs to be reported. <\/p>\n
\u201cChild sex offenders are very intelligent people, they will stop at nothing to accomplish their end game, which is abusing your child.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe thought we were doing what was best for our son because he was in such a fragile mental state \u2026 and again, she was his teacher. We didn\u2019t see the warning signs.<\/p>\n
\u201cTo be fair, the police have actually been reassuring that she is a damn good operator and groomed our son into all of this \u2026 she groomed us.”<\/p>\n
The boy’s parents were furious May kept her name secret for so long. Photo \/ Sylvie Whinray<\/p>\n
In his victim impact statement, the father said he wanted May banned from areas where children congregate.<\/p>\n
\u201cShe should not be allowed anywhere near any school anywhere in New Zealand.<\/p>\n
\u201cOr any other place where children are, to be completely honest.\u201d<\/p>\n
After she was charged, May was still registered as a teacher but was \u201cvoluntarily undertaking not to teach\u201d due to \u201cconduct\u201d.<\/p>\n
Her teaching licence has now been cancelled. <\/p>\n
\u201cWe just want all parents to know that, unfortunately, the world is such a place now that you cannot trust anyone,\u201d the boy\u2019s mother said.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo just be wary and keep an eye on social media – especially things like Snapchat, where police can\u2019t get into and retrieve content. <\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s a dangerous, nasty world and you have to be vigilant.\u201d<\/p>\n
Anna Leask is a senior journalist who covers national crime and justice. She joined the Herald in 2008 and has worked as a journalist for 19 years with a particular focus on family and gender-based violence, child abuse, sexual violence, homicides, mental health and youth crime. She writes, hosts and produces the award-winning podcast A Moment In Crime, released monthly on nzherald.co.nz<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"While she was refused permanent name suppression, she was allowed to keep her name secret until after she…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":292706,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[52495,4619,10106,74,51,1873,34749,20556,31787,161988,9872,48958,42,1364,1345,221,22500,161986,7810,3234,13617,43,1118,3766,9095,5161,161987,17703,22639,13618,161802,7574,165,1865,40,38,41,39,17293],"class_list":{"0":"post-292705","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-headlines","8":"tag-11yearold","9":"tag-act","10":"tag-admitting","11":"tag-after","12":"tag-auckland","13":"tag-charges","14":"tag-conduct","15":"tag-detention","16":"tag-doing","17":"tag-estee","18":"tag-finally","19":"tag-grooming","20":"tag-headlines","21":"tag-her","22":"tag-home","23":"tag-how","24":"tag-indecent","25":"tag-lapsed","26":"tag-may","27":"tag-months","28":"tag-name","29":"tag-news","30":"tag-of","31":"tag-parents","32":"tag-secret","33":"tag-sentenced","34":"tag-sexoffending","35":"tag-sexual","36":"tag-son","37":"tag-suppression","38":"tag-tamlyn","39":"tag-teacher","40":"tag-their","41":"tag-today","42":"tag-top-news","43":"tag-top-stories","44":"tag-topnews","45":"tag-topstories","46":"tag-uncovered"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/292705","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=292705"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/292705\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/292706"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=292705"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=292705"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=292705"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}