{"id":566391,"date":"2026-08-12T04:26:13","date_gmt":"2026-08-12T04:26:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/566391\/"},"modified":"2026-08-12T04:26:13","modified_gmt":"2026-08-12T04:26:13","slug":"what-its-like-to-live-with-misophonia-the-sound-of-chewing-can-send-me-into-a-homicidal-rage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/566391\/","title":{"rendered":"What it\u2019s like to live with misophonia: The sound of chewing can send me into a homicidal rage"},"content":{"rendered":"

Misophonia is a neurological condition, where the body\u2019s incoming signals are confused by certain noises. It then triggers anger and hostility, instead of a more appropriate reaction. Photo \/ Getty Images<\/p>\n

\n Misophonia \u2013 hatred of sounds \u2013 is an extreme emotional and physical response to ordinary noises such as chewing, breathing or tapping. It can send blood pressure soaring, quicken the heartbeat and trigger rage. It\u2019s a new area of research, meaning there\u2019s little decisively known about its causes,
\n prevalence or treatment. One New Zealand woman tells Paulette Crowley about what it\u2019s like to live with the condition, saying she\u2019s so embarrassed about it she doesn\u2019t want her name used.\n <\/p>\n

One of my earliest memories was of being very sensitive to the sound of people chewing. When I heard people eating, I felt an overwhelming sense of rage that was completely out of proportion to the person or the loudness of their chewing. I just hated it. I did try to suppress my reaction because I realised it wasn\u2019t very palatable socially. <\/p>\n

At the time, I associated my reaction with the strictness of our parents\u2019 dinner table protocol. I thought they were quite old-fashioned: we sat at the dinner table every night as a family, said grace and had to be dressed properly. The table was set, manners were expected, there were topics of conversation and no hats were allowed. <\/p>\n

I used to find my mother\u2019s chewing intolerable. The way I felt, she might as well have been an axe murderer. Once the chewing was over, the feeling of rage was instantly gone. She was back to being my lovely mother and I felt regretful and sorry for my reaction.<\/p>\n

I thought I was weird and my parents thought I had bad manners, or that I was just being difficult. I remember them asking me, \u201cHave you ever heard yourself eat an apple? Have you ever heard yourself chew?\u201d Of course, I knew I was no quieter than anyone else when I ate.<\/p>\n

I really didn\u2019t know why I had this massive, unhinged anger when I heard people eating. I would just feel homicidal. Eventually, I found out there\u2019s a name for what I experience: misophonia. It\u2019s a condition where everyday sounds \u2013 in my case, the sound of people eating\u2013 can trigger intense feelings such as anger and panic. When I found out about it, I was like, \u201cOh my god \u2013 it\u2019s a thing that other people have, and it\u2019s more common than I realised.\u201d<\/p>\n

Misophonia has had a massive impact on my life. My reactions are not about hearing and not about the actual food itself \u2013 it\u2019s really about the sound of people chewing. Sometimes I will also be set off by the crackly noise of food wrappers, because that\u2019s associated with chewing. <\/p>\n

I haven\u2019t been to the movies in years because of the sound of people eating popcorn. That sound usually lasts the whole movie. I used to take my kids to the movies when they were small, and I would wear noise-cancelling headphones and listen to a podcast. But now, I choose not to go.<\/p>\n

Chewing gum is the worst, because the sound never ends, whereas with a meal, at some point people will finish eating. Gum just goes on and on and on. <\/p>\n

Another time I was really challenged in an exam room. The woman next to me brought out a banana and muesli bar to eat, and then the woman behind me was sucking on mints. I had to leave in the middle of the exam. After that, I had to get special dispensation to always sit at the back of the room, at a separate table. <\/p>\n

Years ago, I remember working in a shoe shop when a woman came in to make a complaint. While she was complaining (about something unreasonable) she was eating a shrimp salad with chopsticks. I really wanted to swipe that shrimp salad away from her. I mean, can\u2019t people go half an hour without eating? Do we have to eat every single place we go? <\/p>\n

Having dinner with people can also be challenging. I\u2019ve trained my children to chew with their mouths closed but to be honest, dinner in my own home is probably the least stressful of things. Sometimes, if I\u2019m having dinner in a restaurant, I\u2019ll move if someone sitting at the next table is chewing loudly. <\/p>\n

Misophonia can also affect who I spend time with. I\u2019ve got a really good friend who I can\u2019t be around when she\u2019s eating. I\u2019ve even said to other people, \u201cHave you noticed her eating?\u201d They don\u2019t notice it but to me, it\u2019s awful. As much as I love this person and love spending time with her, I really struggle when she\u2019s eating.<\/p>\n

For a while, I thought misophonia was a phobia. I\u2019ve had counselling for it, but it didn\u2019t work and no one ever really identified what it was. I\u2019ve heard it described as the body\u2019s incoming signals getting confused with certain noises. It then triggers anger and hostility, instead of a more appropriate reaction. After the physical sensation of anger has eased, I am fully cognisant of how irrational my reaction is, and how unreasonable it is of me. I do feel a lot of shame, regret and embarrassment afterwards. <\/p>\n

I\u2019ve learnt my misophonia is worse when I\u2019m tired or irritable. I try to do breathing exercises when it\u2019s happening, but it doesn\u2019t really work if I\u2019m too tired or feeling vulnerable. The only thing I respond to is the chewing noise stopping, or me leaving. However, I\u2019ve also figured out if I am calm and well regulated, I can better deal with the misophonia. At times, I can be out to dinner with friends and it\u2019s absolutely fine. It\u2019s as if it\u2019s not really a thing and other things feel bigger. <\/p>\n

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