\u201cI have a very complicated relationship with touring and performing live,\u201d he said. \u201cPeople say: \u2018Oh, you going on tour? You must be really, really excited.\u2019 Not really. I\u2019m terrified.<\/p>\n
\u201cI will look full of bravado and look pompous and look smug and do these grand gestures, which have worked for me because they put my face on the poster and people still buy tickets,\u201d Williams added. \u201cBut actually what\u2019s happening is I feel like the opposite of that all the time, most of the time.\u201d<\/p>\n
Williams also shared that he recently took an autism test that came back negative but showed he has \u201cautistic traits\u201d.<\/p>\n
He has previously spoken candidly about being diagnosed with ADHD and dyslexia.<\/p>\n
On the podcast, he recalled how he\u2019s had to be diagnosed with ADHD three times and spoke of feeling like \u201cyou\u2019re always looking for a cure\u201d.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe first one was around 2006, where I saw these things, ADHD, on the internet. I\u2019m like, \u2018all of those things are me.\u2019 Wow,\u201d he said. \u201cAnd then I started to hear that you could get some medicine that behaved a bit like speed, right? Adderall.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo, I go see the guy and I\u2019m like, \u2018I already know I\u2019m all of these things. I already know that.\u2019 So, I\u2019ll go and say this, then you give me the thing. And he gave me the thing.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere was a relief that I\u2019d got it officially diagnosed, but then also there was more a relief that I was getting 200 of these tablets and then I thought the tablets might fix me because you\u2019re always looking for the cure.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re always looking for the cure for the ailment of the disease inside your head. So I quickly went from taking the pills to crushing them and snorting them!\u201d<\/p>\n
The British pop singer has also been open about his struggles with addiction.<\/p>\n
In the podcast, he says things have been better for him lately. <\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s getting better. I would say it\u2019s gotten better from 45 onwards. This particular tour that I\u2019m now in, I\u2019m very pleased to say, for me, is that I\u2019m dead excited to do my show that I\u2019m doing tomorrow and I was excited to do one last week,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
However, he still gets triggered by PTSD from his years performing with Take That.<\/p>\n
\u201cI said to the wife while I was rehearsing, I said, I\u2019ve got that PTSD stuff about performance, whatever it was in the Take That years and whatever it was subsequently when I got to the top of the mountain and it didn\u2019t fix me. In fact, it made things worse inside me.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhatever all of that stuff was, I still get triggered from it and it still affects me,\u201d he added.<\/p>\n
The 51-year-old global star credits his wife, Ayda Field Williams, for helping shift his perspective when it comes to the anxieties of performing live in front of tens of thousands of people, by highlighting how lucky he is he gets to do what he loves in front of so many people – and how that might not always be the case.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere was something about that moment in particular that just changed the perception, and the gratitude came in for where I am, who I am, what I\u2019m allowed to do, what they allow me to do, what I experience.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd in that moment, thinking about maybe never being able to do it again because of waning popularity or death or whatever it is, in that moment, it just changed my perception,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut 80,000 people never changed my opinion about me.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u201cI have a very complicated relationship with touring and performing live,\u201d he said. \u201cPeople say: \u2018Oh, you going…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":57363,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[34595,1558,1359,156,47896,6871,692,5420,2944,47897,4188,111,139,69,12860,27244,312,47895,11668,47894,6923,13971,102],"class_list":["post-57362","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-entertainment","tag-battles","tag-been","tag-described","tag-entertainment","tag-frequently","tag-has","tag-he","tag-hes","tag-inside","tag-intrusive","tag-living","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-nz","tag-revealed","tag-robbie","tag-says","tag-secretly","tag-thoughts","tag-tourettes","tag-what","tag-williams","tag-with"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57362","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=57362"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57362\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/57363"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=57362"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=57362"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=57362"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}