\u201cAlthough I thought it was all done, it\u2019s not quite,\u201d Winstanley says. \u201cI think it\u2019s just a realisation that this might never be fully done. It\u2019s just a part of life now.\u201d<\/p>\n
In 2023, Winstanley was part of the police tactical squad dispatched to downtown Auckland. A contractor had entered a Queen St building site with a shotgun. Matu Reid killed two fellow workers and injured multiple others, including emergency responders, before taking his own life.<\/p>\n
Detective Shaun Winstanley in the immediate aftermath of a shooting at a building site in Queen St, Auckland, in July, 2023. Photo \/ Tony Johnson<\/p>\n
Shaun \u201cWinnie\u201d Winstanley was seriously wounded. His jaw was shattered into at least 12 pieces; he lost five teeth and suffered thermal burns from the shotgun pellets that sprayed his face. His recovery has been long. In the early months, he couldn\u2019t eat properly, drink much liquid, or tolerate anything hot.<\/p>\n
Firebird Protein Coffee was born of frustration: a caffeinated kitchen-sink experiment that Winstanley turned into a business. And that\u2019s how the Herald lifestyle desk first met him \u2013 flogging cold cans at last year\u2019s Auckland Food Show.<\/p>\n
Back then, getting Winstanley to agree to an interview wasn\u2019t easy. He had a product to sell, and his injuries were the reason for its creation, but he didn\u2019t want to be defined as the cop who was shot in the face.<\/p>\n
Today, he greets the Herald with a confident grin. A different man? \u201cEvolved,\u201d he says, like the business as it launches a flavourless protein powder that hydrates in cold and hot liquids. From October 13, it will roll out nationwide as part of Z Energy\u2019s barista coffee offering, available as a protein latte and protein iced coffee.<\/p>\n
Winstanley couldn\u2019t be happier. <\/p>\n
\u201cI was always going to hide behind the bird,\u201d he says, referencing his company\u2019s phoenix logo. \u201cThat\u2019s also part of my identity now. That\u2019s the stuff that gets me up in the morning. A brand that is going to be more than a brand … striving for bigger and better.\u201d<\/p>\n
The shooting forced an identity reckoning.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was always Winnie the rugby player, and then I joined the police and I was Winnie the police officer … And I felt really uncomfortable being \u2018the police officer who was shot in the face\u2019. I\u2019ve since learned, and have been teaching myself, that identity is not a job.<\/p>\n
\u201cIdentity is made up of multiple things. I\u2019m a husband, I\u2019m a dad, I\u2019m a sports coach, I\u2019m a police officer, I\u2019m a guy who got shot in the face, I\u2019m an advocate for mental health, I\u2019m an entrepreneur … the incident is just part of me. It\u2019s not the sole part of me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Firebird Energy founder Shaun Winstanley with the canned protein coffee developed as part of his recovery and the new powder (right) that can be added to hot or cold drinks. Photo \/ Alyse Wright <\/p>\n
According to data reported last year, New Zealand\u2019s frontline police encounter firearms nearly 10 times a day. Only some instances make headlines. Winstanley confirms he has spoken to the officer injured when fugitive Marokopa father Tom Phillips shot at police before being shot and killed himself.<\/p>\n
At that time, Winstanley was two years into his own recovery, \u201cstill looking down the barrel \u2013 for lack of a better term \u2013 of many different operations\u201d.<\/p>\n
He saw his own early confidence mirrored: \u201cThat\u2019s hard, because you think, \u2018I\u2019m gonna get there, and everything\u2019s going to be back to normal\u2019. It\u2019s just bloody not.\u201d<\/p>\n
The pair\u2019s families recently connected again.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not here to tell his story … but we\u2019ve had three years, he\u2019s hit one year, and it was like, \u2018well, do we tell him that this s*** goes on forever?\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n
Winstanley has previously spoken about not dwelling on the what-ifs and understanding his whys. Now, he says he\u2019s been challenged to dig deeper because it\u2019s too easy to list your partner and\/or your children.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy are they your why? And for me, it\u2019s because I want to be a role model.\u201d<\/p>\n
That means going out and seeing people when he doesn\u2019t want to (\u201chuman connection is part of life\u201d) and going to an operation instead of complaining about it.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s about carrying on and showing up. Showing up is where it\u2019s at … If you understand your \u2018why?\u2019 then you understand your purpose.\u201d<\/p>\n
Three images sum up his mental health approach.<\/p>\n
\u201cMe in my armed offenders uniform \u2013 an image of being indestructible; it\u2019s all black, lots of weapons, you can barely see my face. Me after a run, and that\u2019s just me being a human. And then the third one, which is a photo of one of my most recent X-rays, where you can still see 30 or 40 pellets in my face.\u201d<\/p>\n
The point, Winstanley says, is you can\u2019t see that metal from the outside.<\/p>\n
\u201cEveryone has their bullets, everyone has these things. My story captures the ear and the eye because that\u2019s the nature of it. Everyone\u2019s going through their struggles, and that\u2019s what really motivates me to talk about some of the things that have helped me get through some of the adversity I\u2019ve faced \u2013 in the hope that if it helps one other person, then it\u2019s worth talking about.\u201d<\/p>\n
Before the shooting, he had a \u201charden up and move on\u201d mindset.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s hard to say now, because I\u2019ve experienced some mental health challenges myself. I couldn\u2019t just harden up and move on.<\/p>\n
\u201cI had to start talking about it, and talking to people. And, more importantly, showing some vulnerability. It\u2019s amazing, if you show some vulnerability to another person and you\u2019re genuine about it, what you get from other people. It blows me away what people are going through and the challenges they have.\u201d<\/p>\n
It was a Thursday morning when Winstanley and his colleagues were dispatched to the 21-storey building at the bottom of Queen St. His wife Nicky was at home with their boys. She was kneeling, tying up a shoelace, when one of them looked past her at the television screen and said, \u201coh, there\u2019s a police officer covered in blood and steam\u201d.<\/p>\n
That officer was Winstanley. Four days later, he might not have been there. His bags were packed for a Special Tactics Group qualification course he was due to start that Monday and he says that would likely have been his life for the next three to five years.<\/p>\n
\u201cOur family structure would have been quite different. I would have been on call, I would have been away a lot. Now, I\u2019ve been able to be at home with my children and Nicky has been able to retrain.\u201d<\/p>\n
She now works as an emergency medical technician with Hato Hone St John. Winstanley speaks openly about the separation anxiety he experienced when she had to attend a residential course.<\/p>\n
Shaun and Nicky Winstanley at home in 2025. Photo \/ Michael Craig<\/p>\n
\u201cI went under a rock. I didn\u2019t respond to friends. I didn\u2019t like going out. I really was the opposite of who I usually am, who loves being out there and stuff. It almost made me feel physically ill, to think \u2018I\u2019ve got to go to this group gathering\u2019.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s part of the reason why I started doing a bit of public speaking. It was my way of trying to force myself, and to say \u2018it\u2019s okay, it\u2019s just a phase …\u2019 And I\u2019m still dealing with that a little bit.\u201d<\/p>\n
Surgeons still remove the occasional shotgun pellet. Metal implants mean his reconstructed face still aches in cold weather. Eating a burger is hard work and he understands fatigue in a way he\u2019d never experienced before, but the way he speaks about his recovery is more matter-of-fact than it was a year ago.<\/p>\n
\u201cMy last operation was a lip thing. I was getting a whole lot of saliva and food caught up in here and I was dribbling quite a bit.\u201d<\/p>\n
He jokes to people in the front row of his talks that they risk a weather report and that physically, while he can\u2019t open his mouth as much as he used to, \u201cI think people won\u2019t moan too much about that!\u201d<\/p>\n
Winstanley says: \u201cI\u2019ve come a hugely long way.\u201d<\/p>\n
On long-term unpaid leave, he still hopes to return to the police force. He says the thrill of the job is bringing a calm head and the right training into a chaotic situation.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s just nothing better … The camaraderie is amazing, but that camaraderie is built on a purpose \u2013 to help people who can\u2019t help themselves at that time. So, yeah, I\u2019m very, very passionate about the police and the work that they and all the emergency services staff do. They can be undervalued, but 99.9% of us do it for the right reasons, and that\u2019s to serve people effectively.<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t run into that building that day because my family or friends were in there. I ran into that building because people I had never met in my life were getting shot, killed, or running from harm, and I didn\u2019t have a second thought about it.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut going back requires me to be 100%. My colleagues, the public, the people we serve, rely on us to be the best we can be … and I just think there\u2019s a little bit of work to be done to be where I want to be.\u201d<\/p>\n
Winstanley is unused to not knowing what\u2019s next in his life.<\/p>\n
\u201cBefore, I was always quite methodical \u2013 this is what\u2019s going to happen tomorrow, next month \u2013 I\u2019ve always looked forward.\u201d<\/p>\n
Now?<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s quite a daunting thing to think that nothing\u2019s actually really in your control. That\u2019s the stuff I\u2019m talking about and trying to work through.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a huge amount of positivity and gratitude. I\u2019ve just got to acknowledge that I\u2019m lucky enough to walk out of that building. To have a second chance.\u201d<\/p>\n
Kim Knight joined the New Zealand Herald in 2016 and is a senior journalist on its lifestyle desk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u201cAlthough I thought it was all done, it\u2019s not quite,\u201d Winstanley says. \u201cI think it\u2019s just a realisation…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":626758,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[22641,234841,51,5195,6928,3381,5904,22220,215844,99802,296,7810,3259,13631,111,43,139,69,46616,1881,312,12883,7819,83730,14484,147948],"class_list":["post-626757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-new-zealand","tag-20th","tag-anymore","tag-auckland","tag-be","tag-celebrating","tag-complete","tag-final","tag-going","tag-heck","tag-holy","tag-into","tag-may","tag-milestone","tag-never","tag-new-zealand","tag-news","tag-newzealand","tag-nz","tag-procedure","tag-recovery","tag-says","tag-shaun","tag-shooting","tag-supposed","tag-survivor","tag-winstanley"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/626757","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=626757"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/626757\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/626758"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=626757"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=626757"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=626757"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}