DEAR ABBY: I\u2019m 34 years old and have been diagnosed with schizoaffective bipolar disorder. I have been in treatment for years with a psychiatrist and a therapist, and I take my medication daily as instructed. I do not drink or use drugs. I am committed to my mental health to prove that people like me can lead full lives.<\/p>\n
My family wants me to stay where they live forever, but I dream of moving back down south, where I lived on my own before. I loved the culture, art, weather and friends. Whenever I bring it up, they dismiss it. I think they\u2019re afraid that I will start hallucinating again and not have a support system there.<\/p>\n
I will be graduating soon from a master\u2019s program in counseling, and I look at jobs online all the time. Is it wise to move away from my family with my disorder? Do I sit them down and explain that I was my happiest when I lived there and want to return? I love them and don\u2019t want to hurt them. I think if I have a plan in place and stay on track with medication, it would be safe. \u2014 CONFLICTED IN THE NORTH<\/p>\n
DEAR CONFLICTED: Have you discussed this with your therapist and psychiatrist? If they both sign off on the move, your family will have less cause for concern. Bring a family spokesperson with you and have your therapist go over the support plan for your new environment. The spokesperson can then help you ease the worries of the rest of the family.<\/p>\n
If, however, your care providers don\u2019t think it\u2019s wise to move right now, please listen to them. Ask them to outline some milestones you can work toward to make moving south a healthier goal for the future.<\/p>\n
DEAR ABBY: My brother died a year ago. I have been visiting his widow, \u201cCheryl,\u201d twice a month ever since. She lives an hour away and doesn\u2019t get around very well. I drive to her house, and I treasure my time with her. She was the love of my brother\u2019s life.<\/p>\n
My problem is my sister, \u201cKate.\u201d Kate is self-centered, whiny, disruptive and generally unpleasant. I spend as little time as possible with her. I know that as soon as she finds out about them, Kate will expect to be included in my visits with Cheryl. I haven\u2019t mentioned them, as I would rather not include her. What I would like to see happen is for Kate to come up with her own plan to visit with Cheryl. I love Kate and don\u2019t want to hurt her, but on the other hand, I don\u2019t want her to ruin my visits with Cheryl either. What should I do? \u2014 BAD SISTER IN MISSOURI<\/p>\n
DEAR SISTER: There\u2019s no reason for you to hurt your sister\u2019s feelings. Tell Kate you feel one-on-one visits with your brother\u2019s grieving widow are more beneficial than overwhelming her with additional company. Then (with Cheryl\u2019s permission) suggest that Kate call Cheryl and make some plans to visit with her on her own. If Kate argues, see if you can get Cheryl to back you up.<\/p>\n
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren. For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips penned this column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 270135, Kansas City, MO 64127.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"DEAR ABBY: I\u2019m 34 years old and have been diagnosed with schizoaffective bipolar disorder. I have been in…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":629722,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[134,554,555,111,139,69],"class_list":["post-629721","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-mental-health","tag-health","tag-mental-health","tag-mentalhealth","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-nz"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/629721","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=629721"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/629721\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/629722"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=629721"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=629721"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=629721"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}