\u201cI was at home struggling with the two kids. My wife\u2019s saying, \u2018John, look, you\u2019re a psychologist. Would you please do something?\u2019 And I\u2019m like, \u2018Okay, what am I gonna do here?\u2019<\/p>\n
\u201cWe turned to Nigel\u2019s books.\u201d<\/p>\n
Aiken remembers a particular piece of advice he still calls on.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhen they\u2019re playing up, when they\u2019re pushing back, make the problem their problem.\u201d<\/p>\n
He says that rather than stepping in to fix every problem, he puts the responsibility back on his children.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat really stayed with me throughout my entire parenting life because it was very easy for me just to go, \u2018Oh, it\u2019s not their problem, it\u2019s my problem. I\u2019ve gotta solve it for them.\u2019<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s okay to make it their problem to see what they do about it because they\u2019ve gotta learn.\u201d<\/p>\n
Aiken says he even draws on Latta\u2019s advice when dealing with challenging participants on Married at First Sight.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ve crossed that boundary. You\u2019ve behaved poorly. Now what are you gonna do about it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Now Aiken isn\u2019t just relying on Latta\u2019s work; he\u2019s also bringing it to the screen.<\/p>\n
Lessons on Living is a new three-part documentary based on Latta\u2019s book of the same name. It explores three of Latta\u2019s principles for navigating life\u2019s challenges, and Aiken is fronting the series.<\/p>\n
When he was invited to be involved, Aiken says he needed a few assurances before he would agree to take part.<\/p>\n
One was that Ruckus Media, the team behind much of Latta\u2019s previous TV work, would also produce this project.<\/p>\n
\u201cI wanted it to be authentically Nigel\u2019s, and they knew how to do it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Another condition was ensuring that Latta\u2019s brother Craig and wife Natalie were on board with the project.<\/p>\n
\u201cIf I couldn\u2019t have them, then it just wouldn\u2019t work.\u201d<\/p>\n
Aiken says taking on the documentary came with considerable responsibility, particularly given Latta\u2019s legacy.<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a lot at stake, and I felt like I\u2019ve really gotta deliver.\u201d<\/p>\n
Listen to the full episode<\/a> for more from John Aiken on:<\/p>\n Losing his colleague and friend Mel SchillingThe problem with dating appsWhy he believes resilience is something anyone can develop<\/p>\n Lessons on Living is available on Sky Open, ThreeNow and Neon<\/p>\n Ask Me Anything is an NZ Herald podcast hosted by former Deputy Prime Minister Paula Bennett. New episodes are available every second Sunday.<\/p>\n You can follow the podcast at iHeartRadio<\/a>, Apple Podcasts<\/a>, Spotify<\/a> or wherever you get your podcasts. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\u201cI was at home struggling with the two kids. My wife\u2019s saying, \u2018John, look, you\u2019re a psychologist. Would…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":633773,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[16489,1665,172432,32758,40923,1975,85,1558,57197,10748,1061,380,310542,156,51592,1888,36996,23500,5126,45318,2882,9610,14909,130,111,139,45146,69,1118,90,24366,52990,17145,160404,18916,50216,20441,131,223,13983,437,1316,102],"class_list":["post-633772","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-tv","tag-admits","tag-advice","tag-aiken","tag-anything","tag-ask","tag-at","tag-australia","tag-been","tag-bennett","tag-came","tag-children","tag-decade","tag-dishing","tag-entertainment","tag-external","tag-first","tag-guidance","tag-impact","tag-john","tag-lattas","tag-love","tag-married","tag-me","tag-more","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-nigel","tag-nz","tag-of","tag-on","tag-participants","tag-paula","tag-raising","tag-rely","tag-sight","tag-sights","tag-sometimes","tag-than","tag-the","tag-tough","tag-tv","tag-when","tag-with"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/633772","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=633772"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/633772\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/633773"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=633772"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=633772"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=633772"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}