Now that we have established I am not in fact Amelia\u00a0Dimoldenberg \u2013 and that any boning today will\u00a0be strictly chicken-related \u2013 Ali changes tack. Whenever anyone comes near our table, he loudly explains, to my embarrassment, that we are actually conducting a major drug deal. Having seemingly worked his way through the entire menu, he starts asking what else he would need to buy to get the bill\u00a0up\u00a0to \u00a3500, after discovering that the Guardian is footing it.<\/p>\n
It is, in other words, reassuringly easy to tell that not everything about Ali G has changed, even though\u00a0a lot has happened in the \u201c20 decades\u201d (he means 24 years) since he was last on the big screen in Ali G Indahouse. In that time, the UK has had nine prime\u00a0ministers, survived a global pandemic and seen\u00a0the rise of #MeToo and Black Lives Matter. Or,\u00a0as\u00a0Ali puts it rather more succinctly in the trailer: \u201cThe world went to crap: there was Covid, wars and Ed Sheeran\u201d.<\/p>\n
Back in da house \u2026 Ali G. Photograph: Antonio Olmos\/The Guardian<\/p>\n
Now he\u2019s back in Ali G: Who Iz I? \u2013 and, inevitably, not everybody is delighted. The trailer alone has prompted accusations that the fake dreadlocks, Rastafarian imagery and faux-Jamaican persona now look less like satire and more like an outdated racial caricature. Which is how, 24 years after Ali G first took\u00a0his home town of Staines global, I find myself sitting opposite him in his old manor, trying to work\u00a0out\u00a0whether the UK is ready to show him some respect again.<\/p>\n
Parked outside is the same yellow Renault 5 I remember from Indahouse, now with a homemade Uber sign stuck in the windscreen. Around his neck hangs a diamond teddy bear clutching two sacks of money. It \u201cused to be part of the crown jewels and was worn by the queen, RIP. A bloke who worked as a dog washer at Windsor palace nicked it and then came into the Crooked Billet pub in Iver Heath, where me bought it off him for 20K when me was rich,\u201d he claims.<\/p>\n
More bafflingly, he is wearing four watches. \u201cDem are for different time zones \u2013 dis one is Staines, dis one is Egham, dis one iz Langley Village and dis one iz Scrotland.\u201d There is plenty more to take in, but I should probably attempt to conduct the interview I actually came here for.<\/p>\n
double quotation markThere\u2019s always gonna be haterz. it happened to Jesus, to Ghandi and to Brooklyn Beckham<\/p>\n
So how should I address you \u2013 Ali, Ali G or Mr G?
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Me iz known by me mates as \u201cDe G\u201d, \u201cG-Dog\u201d and \u201cDe\u00a0Ali-torney G-eneral\u201d \u2026 and by Staines Benefits Office as Richard Watkins, Kelvin Matthews and Priyanka Patel.<\/p>\n
And what happened to the dreads?
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Me ain\u2019t never had dreads. Me wears the Rasta bonnet because \u2013 and me iz trusting you to keep dis secret \u2013 dat\u2019s where me keeps me stash, the ganja. Perfect place because the cops ain\u2019t allowed to look under it for religious reasons, innit.<\/p>\n
We find out in the trailer that you\u2019re about to become a dad. How are you preparing? Are you and your Julie going to NCT classes?
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Me has actually already become a daddy, something dat for the last 40 years me has prepared for five times every day. Me usually just prepared with me Julie, although one time we also prepared with Cheryl from Abrakebabra in dis marble Jacuzzi me bought off eBay, which tragically didn\u2019t end well. Me put it upstairs at Nan\u2019s house, when me filled it with water and the three of us got in, it was too heavy and broke through the floor and landed on me Nan, who was sitting in the room downstairs. Luckily it killed her instantly, completely squashed her. She died happy because just one week before, me had bought her a new pair of double-F swingaz for her 88th birthday. The weight of the Jacuzzi caused them to literally explode; one of her nipples was found three streets away. Anyway, when one life ends, another one starts, and me iz loving being a dad.<\/p>\n
Who\u2019s the daddy? \u2026 Ali G in a still from his new film, with Morgana Robinson as his Julie. Photograph: Amazon MGM Studios<\/p>\n
What sort of dad are you?
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There have been some discipline issues. No matter how many times me tells the baby, \u201cHands off, dem iz mine!\u201d, him keeps trying to grab me Julie\u2019s swingaz. But there you go \u2013 like his dad, he iz a boobs man, innit. Me loves him and he iz well brainy, at six months old him can already read audiobooks.<\/p>\n
Staines officially became Staines-upon-Thames in 2012, partly to improve the town\u2019s image after years of association with you \u2013 but now there\u2019s a petition calling for a statue of you in the town. Do you feel vindicated? And if they build it, would you pose for it \u2013 perhaps naked, like Michelangelo\u2019s David?
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Firstly, it ain\u2019t because of me they changed the name of Staines. It\u2019s because in 2012 the River Thames started flowing through the town, so they added it to the name, innit. Thirdly, me iz well proud dat they want to put a statute of me in the middle of Staines. Me Julie says the only difference between dat and the real thing iz dat the statute won\u2019t be selling ganja \u2013 they\u2019ll both be hanging around the town centre doing nothing, ha ha ha! Unfortunately, as well as loads of people wanting the statute, there are also loads of people who don\u2019t, because of racialism. Me ain\u2019t gonna let them win and iz willing to pay out of me Julie\u2019s pocket for an Ali G erection in the middle of Staines.<\/p>\n
skip past newsletter promotion<\/a><\/p>\n Sign up to The Guide<\/p>\n Get our weekly pop culture email, free in your inbox every Friday<\/p>\n after newsletter promotion<\/p>\n This is your first film in 24 years. Why come back now? Did the world need Ali G, or did Ali G need the world? The Guardian has already been arguing about whether you should have come back at all. Arwa Mahdawi<\/a> wrote \u201cAli G is back. I really wish he wasn\u2019t\u201d, while Jason Okundaye<\/a> argued that Britain \u2013 and the joke \u2013 have changed. Jacob Rees-Mogg<\/a>, meanwhile, has defended you on his Instagram, describing you as \u201cclever, satiric humour that makes the country look faintly foolish. And that\u2019s no bad thing.\u201d So who understands Ali G better in 2026: the Guardian or Jacob Rees-Mogg? double quotation markMe\u2019d have a puff with God and ask him: why does him allow terrible things to happen: like wars, diseases and Coldplay?<\/p>\n You\u2019ve come back to a world full of influencers, pranksters, podcasters and people asking strangers stupid questions on TikTok. Do you feel like everyone\u2019s basically nicked your act? You\u2019ve spent your career interviewing politicians, experts and other important people. Who would you most like to interview now? Who is the stupidest person you\u2019ve ever interviewed? By now Ali has eaten an alarming amount of chicken. I\u2019ve laughed far more than I expected to \u2013 including a few times when I probably shouldn\u2019t. He is still crude, badly informed and completely inappropriate. But that was always the trick: every so often, the stupidest person in the room accidentally asks the smartest question. Before we go our separate ways, there\u2019s just one question I need to ask. Does he think I\u2019ve got what it takes to join the West Staines Massiv? Is there some kind of initiation process?<\/p>\n \u201cMe\u2019ll have to check with the rest of me posse first \u2013 his name iz Dangerous Dave,\u201d says Ali. \u201cMe\u2019ll ask him when he finishes work at HSBC at 5pm.\u201d<\/p>\n Ali G: Who Iz I? is in cinemas from 23 October.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/1792319770_687_500.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"Ali](\"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/479.jpg\")
I\u2019m with stupid \u2026 Ali G meets Donald Trump. Photograph: Channel 4<\/p>\n
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Dis ain\u2019t actually me first film in 24 years. Me has also made about 300 others with me Julie and iz hoping Amazon will buy them off me and put them in the \u201cmembers only\u201d part of their site. But to answer your question, the world needed me. Dis movie will be the most important release since the Jeffrey Einstein files, and me made it to increase the peace, bring both sides together and hopefully prevent world war two from ever happening. It has also got more boning in it than the Einstein files \u2013 all of it legal \u2013 and because me iz now woke, me also included a nude man\u2019s battyhole to keep the LGBLT community happy.<\/p>\n
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Me ain\u2019t never heard of any of those people, but from their names it seems to me dat Jacob Rees-Mogg iz the only person of colour, so him supporting me iz all dat matters. There are always gonna be haterz, innit. Me ain\u2019t the first intellectual to get dat \u2013 it happened to Jesus, it happened to Gandhi, it even happened to Brooklyn Beckham. For the good of humanoidkind, me has just got to keep speaking out. People shutting me down ain\u2019t nothing new. In fact, me was cancelled just two years ago by Staines Benefits Office for pretending to be a disabled Albanian woman with seven children. Me just bounced right back with a new name. Don\u2019t never let the authorities oppress you, innit.<\/p>\n
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For real, loads of people have been copying me, especially the way me looks and talks \u2013 which makes them cultural appropriators and dat iz well out of order. It makes me well sad how fick the world has become since me was on telly doing interviews 20 decades ago \u2013 most reporters now can\u2019t even correctly spell the word \u201cjourmalist\u201d, let alone ask brainy questions like you and me does do, innit.<\/p>\n
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Me has always dreamed big, both in me personal life \u2013 for example, last night me imagined doing it with Sydney Sweeney; dat iz a woman, by the way, in case you ain\u2019t heard of her. Me ain\u2019t got nothing against homosapiens, me just ain\u2019t one of them \u2013 and also in me professional life. Check dis: me wants to do the biggest interview ever \u2013 to go up to heaven and have a chat with none other than God himself. Me\u2019d have a look around heaven \u2013 iz it any good, or iz it well boring, just a load of old blokes sitting around playing harps? Then me\u2019d have a puff with God and ask him the tough questions: why does him allow terrible things to happen to the Earth, like wars, diseases and Coldplay? Also, while me was up there, me\u2019d check in on me Nan, see if she\u2019s doing all right and if she can still remember the Netflix password for our house.<\/p>\n
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The most fickest person me ever spoke to was Domald Trump. How him ever became America\u2019s prime minister me will never know. Also, how did him get to marry all them really fit women \u2013 first Ivanka, then Stormy Daniels and now dat one who looks like a Transformer, Melania?<\/p>\n