{"id":636073,"date":"2026-10-20T07:52:10","date_gmt":"2026-10-20T07:52:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/636073\/"},"modified":"2026-10-20T07:52:10","modified_gmt":"2026-10-20T07:52:10","slug":"my-morning-comedian-guy-williams-on-how-not-to-start-your-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/636073\/","title":{"rendered":"My Morning: Comedian Guy Williams on how not to start your day"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I fire up the news app,  which is a huge mistake, as I read about all the tragedy and bad things happening in the world, and I feel  100 times worse. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Is this going how it\u2019s supposed to go?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">How does your morning routine continue?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">My favourite app is the Guardian because I think they\u2019re doing too much. Like I\u2019m already aware of a lot of the problems, like wars, genocides, climate change, but then the Guardian will be doing investigations into how the world\u2019s running out of sand. And I\u2019m like, sand? Oh no, now I\u2019ve got to worry about Gaza, Ukraine and sand. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I\u2019ll skim the articles, and apparently, we don\u2019t have enough sand for building hospitals and stuff now because it\u2019s all gone to Dubai to build, like, islands for David Beckham or something like that.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Next, I check my messages, which is even worse. Messaging friends, family, enemies, starting fights in group chats, that kind of thing. Then around 9.30 or 10am, I\u2019m like, oh s***, I\u2019ve got to go to work.<\/p>\n<p><img  alt=\"Guy Williams bikes to work. Photo \/ Guy Williams\" class=\"article-media__image responsively-lazy\" data-test-ui=\"article-media__image\"\/>Guy Williams bikes to work. Photo \/ Guy Williams<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Do you have a morning workout routine?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I get on my e-bike and bike to work. It\u2019s not a  long bike (seven to 12 minutes from Freemans Bay to Morningside), but I bike chaotically. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">The other day, I was a bit cheeky. I was weaving through traffic, and a car was firing up at me. He was yelling at me and beeping his horn, but then when we got to the lights, he recognised me. He goes, \u201coh sorry Guy, I didn\u2019t realise it was you\u201d. As if recognising me has any effect on whether you should yell at someone you don\u2019t like&#8230;<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">He looked at my bike and asked me why I can\u2019t afford a car. Which I thought was funny. I have a car, but I like to bike to work, A) because it\u2019s faster and B) it\u2019s a better start to the day. My day, as I\u2019ve described, is  terrible until I either walk or bike.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">What time do you have breakfast and what do you usually eat?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">You may have noticed I haven\u2019t had any food in this process.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I normally forget to eat until about 11 or midday, so when most people are having lunch, I\u2019m normally having breakfast. I love Hubbards granola and oat milk, Vogels and peanut butter; Fix &amp; Fogg if I\u2019m on a health kick, and American sugar peanut butter if I\u2019m feeling normal.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">How do you decide what to wear each day?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I throw my phone across the room, and I frantically scramble on any clothes  I can find. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I have a spare room with a lot of clothes piled up, and I grab from that. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">If me and my girlfriend are going out in the evening,  I\u2019ll put a little bit of thought into what I\u2019m wearing and maybe do layers or something like that. But when I wake up in the morning, it\u2019s always slides to save time on socks and tying my laces, and shorts and a T-shirt. If it\u2019s winter, then I\u2019ll put a jersey over the shirt. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I always have on my New Year\u2019s resolutions to dress better, and I have gotten a little  better, but I\u2019m still very bad.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">How many hours of sleep do you get?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Normally, when I wake up, and my watch says \u201cyou\u2019ve done a bad job\u201d, I know I\u2019ve done a bad job, you don\u2019t need to tell me that. But I did well last night. I got six hours and 52 minutes. My average is five hours 52.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Does your partner have the same routine as you?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I\u2019d say she\u2019s a little more organised. When I wake up, I try to text my girlfriend good morning as well if we\u2019re not in the same place. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">She\u2019s a dancer, so she often, like me, has unusual hours, working in the evenings or not starting until 3 or 4pm. If she\u2019s doing a night-time show, then she might sleep in with me, or if she\u2019s got to go to rehearsals, then she\u2019ll be up earlier, and I\u2019ll just lie there and pretend I\u2019m dead.<\/p>\n<p><img  alt=\"Guy Williams and his partner Lucy have similar but different sleep schedules. Photo \/ Guy Williams\" class=\"article-media__image responsively-lazy\" data-test-ui=\"article-media__image\"\/>Guy Williams and his partner Lucy have similar but different sleep schedules. Photo \/ Guy Williams<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Is the weekend morning routine the same as the weekdays?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I get up earlier on the weekend at 8am to play social football on Saturday and  Sunday, it\u2019s just whatever happens happens. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">For football, that\u2019s  the earliest I wake up in the week, and I feel embarrassed to say this because most of your readers will probably be jealous of my sleep routine, but I\u2019m an idiot. I go to bed late as well, so don\u2019t think I\u2019m some sort of well-rested savant because I\u2019m definitely not nailing it.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Any non-negotiables in the morning?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Definitely not. I have absolutely no rules. I should get some rules. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I\u2019ve been telling myself for about five or six years that I need to wake up and make the bike first thing in the morning, or go outside for a walk or a run. That\u2019s the absolute dream, to not check my phone and to get out and be part of the world, because I think  phones are ruining many people\u2019s lives, and maybe mine to an extent. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">If I could get the phone out of my life as much as possible, that would be ideal.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Anything you do the night before to make getting up easier?<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">No, I\u2019m  sorry if anyone\u2019s reading this for guru health tips \u2013 they\u2019ve come to the wrong place. Yesterday, my director was explaining to me what meal prep was. I\u2019ve never done meal prep in my life.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">I\u2019ve never thought anything through like that in my life, so I just eat simple meals that take no time to make. If I organised them the night before, that would make my life  better, but I don\u2019t. Absolutely useless. <\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Responses edited for length and clarity.<\/p>\n<p class=\"FxSPvgIxedhFU\" style=\"display:none\">Guy Williams performs the Best Comedy Show On Earth on November 14 at the Bruce Mason Centre. Tickets at <a href=\"https:\/\/url.au.m.mimecastprotect.com\/s\/vhwOC5QZJnfyDVNJu2sqGsk2qrr?domain=google.com\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\" title=\"https:\/\/url.au.m.mimecastprotect.com\/s\/vhwOC5QZJnfyDVNJu2sqGsk2qrr?domain=google.com\" target=\"_blank\">comedyfestival.co.nz<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I fire up the news app, which is a huge mistake, as I read about all the tragedy&hellip;\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":636074,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[1443,40367,5972,156,82216,242602,221,1304,4977,111,139,5006,69,90,163385,1963,4497,165,1961,61,13971,1959,24750],"class_list":["post-636073","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-entertainment","tag-about","tag-comedian","tag-day","tag-entertainment","tag-guy","tag-highachieving","tag-how","tag-morning","tag-my","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-not","tag-nz","tag-on","tag-routines","tag-series","tag-start","tag-their","tag-this","tag-to","tag-williams","tag-your","tag-zealanders"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/636073","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=636073"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/636073\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/636074"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=636073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=636073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=636073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}