{"id":659489,"date":"2026-11-13T08:12:09","date_gmt":"2026-11-13T08:12:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/659489\/"},"modified":"2026-11-13T08:12:09","modified_gmt":"2026-11-13T08:12:09","slug":"he-learned-he-has-35-siblings-heres-how-he-aired-his-family-secret","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/659489\/","title":{"rendered":"He learned he has 35 siblings. Here\u2019s how he aired his family secret"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"\">Noam Tomaschoff found out that the man who raised him was not his biological father. He dealt with it the best way he knew how.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\">Noam Tomaschoff knew something was wrong when his parents asked him to sit down with them at their kitchen table.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\">\n         His parents each took one<br \/>\n         of his hands.\n        <\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cWe are not a hand-holding family,\u201d Tomaschoff said. \u201cI thought someone had died.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Instead, his parents told him a secret they had planned to keep from their only child \u2013 and everyone else \u2013 forever: the man who raised him was not his biological father. He was conceived with a sperm donor.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cI was profoundly shocked,\u201d said Tomaschoff, 35. \u201cI had never remotely considered this to be a possibility.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">The revelation began with Tomaschoff\u2019s spontaneous decision to buy a DNA test kit in 2022 when he saw it was on sale.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">He mentioned it to his mother. The next morning, his parents sat him down to reveal the truth.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cIt was like meeting aliens,\u201d said Tomaschoff, who grew up in Toronto, Canada and now lives in Washington DC. \u201cYour entire concept of reality is now called into question.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Two months later, when the test results arrived, Tomaschoff learned that he had at least 15 half-siblings. Since then, he has found 20 others, and he believes there are more.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Tomaschoff shared every new development with two close friends from high school, Russell Citron and Ryan Peters. They were \u201cas shocked and as amazed and agog as I was\u201d, he said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">The trio had grown up in Toronto loving musicals and had written and staged one together in high school. They decided Tomaschoff\u2019s DNA discovery could become the premise for a one-man musical.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">That spark became Our Little Secret, a musical written and performed by Tomaschoff, produced by Citron and with music by Peters.<\/p>\n<p><img  alt=\"Show producer Russell Citron, left, onstage with Tomaschoff just before he met seven of his half-siblings. Photo \/ Duane Cole, The Washington Post\" class=\"article-media__image responsively-lazy\" data-test-ui=\"article-media__image\"\/>Show producer Russell Citron, left, onstage with Tomaschoff just before he met seven of his half-siblings. Photo \/ Duane Cole, The Washington Post<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Tomaschoff\u2019s parents were initially not pleased about the idea of the show, which premiered at the Toronto Fringe Festival in 2023, then travelled to Edinburgh, Scotland; Montreal and Edmonton in Canada, before returning to Toronto.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cThey were totally shocked and freaking out at the prospect of having this revealed in such a spectacular fashion in the place where they live, where all of their friends and connections are \u2013 none of whom were privy to this story,\u201d Tomaschoff said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cWe were very nervous,\u201d said his father, Gideon Tomaschoff. \u201cWe were still at the stage where it was a big secret.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">He and his wife, Sylvie Leone, decided they couldn\u2019t stop their son and thought it was time to start telling close friends and family.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cIt\u2019s very freeing to be able to talk about it openly,\u201d Leone said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">On Sunday (Monday NZT), seven of Tomaschoff\u2019s donor siblings flew to Toronto from across the United States to see the play and surprise him after the performance.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Citron announced the siblings\u2019 presence at curtain call, and Tomaschoff \u2013 who was visibly stunned and emotional \u2013 ran into the audience to embrace them. People across the audience were in tears.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cIt was such a powerful moment,\u201d said Citron, who planned the surprise with the donor siblings. \u201cHe had a huge smile on his face.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">While Tomaschoff was astounded to see them at his show, it seemed a fitting twist in the improbable story.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">The trip was coordinated by two of Tomaschoff\u2019s donor siblings: Brandy Erwin, 42, of Greenville, South Carolina, and Kayla Breese, 39, of Cumberland, Rhode Island.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Like Tomaschoff, Erwin learned as an adult that the man who raised her was not her biological father.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Erwin began connecting with her donor siblings, and earlier this year, she flew to Fort Lauderdale for a reunion. There, she met Breese. They hatched a plan for a group trip to see Our Little Secret.<\/p>\n<p><img  alt=\"Noam Tomaschoff, centre, with half-sisters, from left, Fallon Bullington, Kayla Breese, Brandy Erwin and Leslie Hicks. Photo \/ Duane Cole, The Washington Post\" class=\"article-media__image responsively-lazy\" data-test-ui=\"article-media__image\"\/>Noam Tomaschoff, centre, with half-sisters, from left, Fallon Bullington, Kayla Breese, Brandy Erwin and Leslie Hicks. Photo \/ Duane Cole, The Washington Post<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cHow amazing would it be for us to show up and surprise him?\u201d Erwin recalled saying to Breese, who learned in 2024 that she was part of the same donor-sibling group after receiving a 23andMe test kit as a holiday gift.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cI laughed with my husband because I\u2019m a musical theatre lover and former performer, and I said, \u2018Of course I have a sibling who wrote a musical about this,\u2019\u201d said Breese, who hadn\u2019t met Tomaschoff before Sunday\u2019s performance. Many of the siblings, she said, have musical backgrounds.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cThe play was absolutely phenomenal,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Not every sibling who attended wanted to be photographed or identified, as several said they are navigating complicated family dynamics. Erwin said her own family is still processing the news.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">While initially Tomaschoff\u2019s parents weren\u2019t keen on their long-held family secret being spilled onstage, they later became comfortable with the idea.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cThey came around, and now we feel like this show really represents us as a family,\u201d Tomaschoff said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cHe took this thing and leveraged it into something that healed him, healed us, healed the whole family,\u201d his father said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">The musical follows Tomaschoff from the kitchen-table revelation through to the arrival of his DNA results and the discovery of \u2013 and connection with \u2013 his many half-siblings. Tomaschoff said the show has helped his family process their complicated history.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cThis created a focal point for us to place our energy and attention and build on a new foundation,\u201d Tomaschoff said. \u201cIt has made sense of this for us.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">His parents had experienced fertility challenges, they said, and their doctor advised them to keep the sperm donor a secret \u2013 a recommendation that several of Tomaschoff\u2019s donor siblings said their parents received, too.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cThe whole industry was based on secrecy,\u201d Gideon Tomaschoff said. \u201cSecrecy was a precondition for the whole thing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Right after getting his test results from 23andMe, Tomaschoff began connecting with his donor siblings, most of whom live in the United States. He first messaged the one who had been most recently active on the platform.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cShe welcomed me to \u2018the tribe\u2019,\u201d Tomaschoff said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">That woman was Leslie Hicks, 43, who flew from Fort Lauderdale to surprise her half-brother at his play. Hicks had taken a DNA test in 2019 after suspicions that the man who raised her was not her biological father.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Hicks said connecting with her donor siblings \u2013 sometimes called \u201cdiblings\u201d \u2013 has been an unexpected gift. Like Tomaschoff, and others in the group, Hicks grew up as an only child.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cIt\u2019s definitely been a silver lining,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cIt\u2019s been a really easy connection,\u201d added Fallon Bullington, 36, who travelled from New York City to see the show.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">The donor siblings, who are in a Facebook group for people conceived using the same sperm donor, check in with each other regularly.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Tomaschoff\u2019s biological father died two years before his parents told him the truth.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Some of his donor siblings had the chance to meet him, and Tomaschoff has learned about his biological father through a son he raised, who is also in the Facebook group.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">When Tomaschoff is not focused on the play, he works as a tour guide in Washington DC. One of his donor siblings lives nearby in Virginia, and they spend a lot of time together. He said their dynamic falls somewhere between siblings and friends.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cI have a special type of relationship with these people,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">Since releasing the show, Tomaschoff said, he often hears from audience members with similar stories.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cI hope it makes people feel seen,\u201d Tomaschoff said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">His parents said they\u2019re glad to see their son embracing his once-hidden history, connecting with his siblings and turning it all into something creative.<\/p>\n<p class=\"vceRuCEEWmUOvGhtp\" style=\"display:none\">\u201cHe seems to be fully thriving,\u201d said his father. \u201cThat makes us really, really happy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"#\" class=\"flex cursor-pointer items-center gap-1.5 text-black\" data-test-ui=\"social-link--bookmark-below\" aria-label=\"bookmark\" id=\"social-link--bookmark-below\">Save<\/a>Share this article<\/p>\n<p class=\"mx-4 mt-2.5 text-xs font-normal leading-5 text-sys-text-premium\">Reminder, this is a Premium article and requires a subscription to read.<\/p>\n<p>Copy LinkEmailFacebookTwitter\/XLinkedInReddit<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Noam Tomaschoff found out that the man who raised him was not his biological father. He dealt with&hellip;\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":659490,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[64869,59745,3390,9541,44933,156,2109,2209,1874,6871,692,26098,293,221,6451,40484,111,139,323010,69,2081,9095,24831,1361,323011,102],"class_list":["post-659489","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-entertainment","tag-64869","tag-aired","tag-best","tag-biological","tag-dealt","tag-entertainment","tag-family","tag-father","tag-found","tag-has","tag-he","tag-heres","tag-his","tag-how","tag-knew","tag-learned","tag-new-zealand","tag-newzealand","tag-noam","tag-nz","tag-raised","tag-secret","tag-siblings","tag-that","tag-tomaschoff","tag-with"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/659489","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=659489"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/659489\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/659490"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=659489"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=659489"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/nz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=659489"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}