If you want to know how it feels to lose a World Cup final there are few better to consult than Rochelle Clark. She has been involved in four of them and England’s second most-capped player – male or female – has experienced defeat three times. The first, in 2006, was a particularly bitter pill. “It feels as if you’ve had your heart ripped out. It’s absolutely horrific. You don’t know pain like it.”

So when “Rocky” did finally win one in 2014, at her third attempt, it surpassed anything she had ever previously experienced. “For me it was the best day of my life and something I’ll always cherish,” she says. “Even talking about it now I’m smiling. I can still close my eyes and remember lifting up the trophy and the little gold ticker tape flying everywhere. It was magnificent.”

Welcome to the vast emotional gulf separating success and failure at every World Cup. It was not dissimilar for the prop’s former teammate Maggie Alphonsi, who had decided in advance that the 2014 World Cup final would be her final Test: “I remember crying the night before the final because I knew it would be the last time I’d get that jersey.” Her modern successors, she thinks, should try to adopt the mindset she belatedly embraced. “The next morning I thought: ‘Right. I’m done with that, let’s focus on getting the job done.’”

But let’s be realistic. On a historic weekend such as this, set to smash all previous records for a standalone women’s fixture, that can be easier said than done. As Clark puts it: “It’s really bizarre trying to treat it like any other game if you know it’s the biggest game of your life and will potentially change rugby for ever.” And talking to some of England’s former greats – queens of the stone age years when women’s rugby was less celebrated – there is agreement that the actual game is only half the story.

Alphonsi, for one, cannot wait to see a sold-out Twickenham: “I’m genuinely not quite sure how I’m going to handle the emotions. I’ve never seen Twickenham at full capacity for a women’s game. That sentence just blows my mind. If we’d had all this back in 2014 it would have been amazing. I’m proud of all the women who have pushed that along and been involved on and off the pitch.”

Others, such as Catherine Spencer, the outstanding No 8 who led England in the last World Cup final on home soil in 2010, have already felt a surge of wonderment during this tournament, along with an understandable twinge of: “It could have been me.” As Spencer says: “I thought my emotions had started to settle but then I took my daughter May to the England v Australia game at Brighton. It was a fantastic atmosphere and when the teams lined up for the anthems I just burst into tears.

“There was definitely an element of: ‘Look where we are!’ Then you think: ‘Wow, it would have been amazing to play in front of that.’ But, equally, when I played in front of 13,000 people at Twickenham [in 2010], that felt amazing because it had never happened before.”

Amid all the excitement, though, there is another less comfortable narrative. What if a fully professional, enviably resourced England lose to a side that, in part, has had to crowdfund its path to this tournament and contains firefighters and teachers in its midst? Canada are a proper team, as they showed against New Zealand in the semi-final, but even so? “You have to say that if England don’t win it has to be considered a failure,” continues Spencer. “They’ve had so much investment. If England don’t win another World Cup with the resources they have you kind of have to ask questions. And ditto if Canada win it, with the resources they have.

“If I was completely objective I think my heart would lie with Canada. They’ve had to fight very different battles to be at this World Cup. I think England have played good rugby at times but Canada have been absolutely outstanding. Everyone’s fighting for their own fairy tale.”

Maggie Alphonsi runs in to score a try against France in 2013. She feels England will feel ‘failure’ if they do not win the final. Photograph: Shaun Botterill/Getty Images

Alphonsi also believes there is much at stake despite the tournament having already transformed the profile of the women’s game. “If England win it will be the cherry on the top,” she says. “They’ve already created a significant legacy and attendances have been amazing. But anyone associated with this team will say that if they don’t win this World Cup it will be a failure. It’s something they’ve been working towards since 2014. If they don’t win, it’ll be really heartbreaking in terms of not achieving their KPI [key performance indicators]. For John Mitchell, his coaching staff and his players they need this World Cup. If I was still a player then deep down anything other than a win is a failure.”

Clark, for her part, sounds ready to get her boots back on despite having just completed a 750-mile charity cycle ride (@goldengirlsrugby on Instagram) with three other former players to raise funds and awareness for motor neurone disease. Clark says: “The best piece of advice I’ve ever had is: ‘When you’re under pressure, go to your strengths.’ Don’t try and force a massive pass if you’re an amazing ball-carrier. Just try and do what you’re best at and that’ll get you in the game.

skip past newsletter promotion

The latest rugby union news and analysis, plus all the week’s action reviewed

Privacy Notice: Newsletters may contain information about charities, online ads, and content funded by outside parties. If you do not have an account, we will create a guest account for you on theguardian.com to send you this newsletter. You can complete full registration at any time. For more information about how we use your data see our Privacy Policy. We use Google reCaptcha to protect our website and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Rochelle Clark celebrates a victory over France in 2016. Of Saturday’s final she says: ‘It is going to change the game for ever, whatever happens.’ Photograph: Peter Cziborra/Reuters

“Let’s be honest, England haven’t been under masses of pressure which I think Canada will bring. The biggest thing is that everybody sticks to process. If you try and force things and you’re panicked that’s when things muck up. You’ve got to be patient and stay in the arm wrestle.”

Not without good reason has Clark recently been elevated to World Rugby’s Hall of Fame reserved for the creme de la creme of the global game. And yet, in the end, what shines through brightest from her and her old Red Rose comrades is the shared joy that, finally, women’s rugby is reaching the promised land largely denied to them. “I think it is going to change the game for ever, whatever happens in the final,” Clark says.

“People are now noticing that women’s rugby is amazing to watch and that people need to back it. We saw with the Lionesses how that grew and attracted new fans. If England win the World Cup it will rocket the support in England.”

Unless, of course, the can-do Canadians have other ideas.