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55th over: Australia 289-3 (Smith 61, Green 44)
54th over: Australia 287-3 (Smith 60, Green 43) Brydon Carse replaces Jofra Archer, England set a field for short-pitched bowling… and Carse’s over disappears for 17. Green backs away to flat bat four over mid-off, then Smith top-edges six over the man placed on the boundary almost as a long stop.
Carse’s figures are R-rated: 12-1-95-1. Good job he bowled that maiden eh.
“Bill the Chef at Foyle Hospice is the man with all the gen on plantar fasciitis,” writes Colum Farrelly. “He has distilled the knowledge of every passing medic over the last year. His summary of the effective treatment is delivered in proper Stokesian English: ‘Nothing effin’ works.’” Glad to be of service.”
53rd over: Australia 270-3 (Smith 52, Green 35) It’s an indictment of England’s performance that Australia have scored at more than five an over without being especially aggressive. A good ball from Atkinson, just full of a good length, zips past Smith’s attempted drive. Next stop, rocket science.
When Atkinson hits a similar length, slightly wider, Smith inside-edges just past the stumps for two. England can still win this game – batting last won’t be easy – but they have to take at least two or three wickets tonight.
“You’re not alone in being a bit perplexed at the bowling on show here, and I have to say I find this a lot more troubling than the batting, which has been, shall we say, chaotic for much of Stokes’ tenure,” writes Will Vignoles. “However, I can’t remember the last time they’ve got it this wrong in the field – they’ve been outmatched by good batters a few times of course but today they’ve bowled like a drain and been tactically all over the shop. What is it about Australia that scrambles England regimes so much?”
Steve Smith takes evasive action. Photograph: Dave Hunt/AAPShare
Updated at 04.53 EST
52nd over: Australia 267-3 (Smith 50, Green 34) Smith, trying to glide another boundary, almost drags Archer onto his stumps. A graphic on the TV coverage shows that 61.5 per cent of England’s deliveries have been short today. That’s all wrong.
Chris Paraskevas, whose drunken email was the highlight of the afternoon session from an English perspective, has filed an update.
Made the decision to stop drinking. Soberring up a bit. Headache has started already which is such an underrated part of an afternoon sesdsion..
Been thinking about England’s last victorious squad in Australia. Bowling lineup (and in general) just feels more balanced. More variety (bounce, skid, pace, swing, spin). Same could be said or batting.
Mhey heeeeeaaaaaadddddddd!!!!!
… Gotta love twst cricket.
I’m not sure it was a more balanced squad, just better, particularly the batting line-up. And Australia were worse. Simple game!
Updated at 04.45 EST
Hey, England fans, I know it’s bad. But I’ve found a great new pop song that will cheer you up!
“After 33 Tests, we’re still waiting on Green to play an Innings That Counts…” writes Eamonn Maloney. “Don’t like seeing him higher than No6 with a sub-35 average.”
Tell that to Zak Crawley. The 174 not out in that otherwise low-scoring game in New Zealand counted, surely? The 70-odd at Galle in 2022 was a very good innings as well, if not quite an ITC.
ShareFifty for Steve Smith!
51st over: Australia 266-3 (Smith 50, Green 33) Smith waits for a widish ball from Atkinson, opens the face and slices it for four. That’s the third boundary – all to third – in the space of six balls.
Smith clips another boundary between mid-on and midwicket, and a quick single takes him to a determined, businesslike fifty from 67 balls. Nobody in Australian cricket enjoys the feeling of boot on English throat as much as Smith, who was No8 – and the highest current player – in our list of the 100 greatest men’s Ashes cricketers.
Australia’s Steven Smith celebrates after reaching his half century. Photograph: Hollie Adams/ReutersAustralian fans cheers Steve Smith’s four. Photograph: Bradley Kanaris/Cricket Australia/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 04.50 EST
50th over: Australia 256-3 (Smith 41, Green 32) Smith is hit on the hand by Archer, then glides a boundary past the slip cordon. For all the times Smith has been wounded by Archer, he’s never fallen to him in a Test match. England could really use a bit of statbusting right now.
Green steers four more to the same part of the ground. Australia trail by just 86 runs and have a couple of fingers on the urn. Already.
“David Sedaris did a marvellous piece on a lecturer he once had who leant into ‘authentic’ pronunciation with tremendous commitment,” writes Matt Dony. “The class would try and get him to say ‘Nicaraguan’, as he would entertainingly pronounce it ‘Nee-har-raw-ahn’. For years, my sister and I have used this as shorthand for over-pronounced foreign language phrases. ‘He pronounced soupçon in nee-har-raw-ahn French.’ Of course, I have little high ground, as the other week it took me five attempts to order chorizo in a cafe, and the cashier only understood when I said ‘chor-i-tzo.’ Mrs Dony found the whole exchange hilarious. Anyway, hoping for a monster bowling session!”
How are you pronouncing that?
49th over: Australia 247-3 (Smith 36, Green 28) A fuller nip-backer from Atkinson is inside-edged onto the pad by Green. Close, close, close. Atkinson has no wickets in the series but has been one of England’s better bowlers. Only Jofra Archer has been more economical, which speaks to something.
“Congrats to the new OBO parents,” writes Mike Selvey, legend of the Guardian’s cricket coverage and inspiration for some of The Streets’ best work. “I got news of the birth of my first grandchild as I was getting out of a cab in Vulture St on the first morning of the 1998-99 Ashes. It is why I get her birthday wrong because it was 20 November in Brisbane but only 19th at home.”
Haha. I’m amazed, given how thick I am, that I’ve never slept through the first day of an overseas Ashes series after getting the dates mixed up.
48.1 overs: Australia 247-3 (Smith 36, Green 28) Green is hit nastily on the hand by Atkinson, leading to a break in play while he receives treatment. There’s a bit of blood oozing from the nail on his right thumb.
Updated at 04.30 EST
48th over: Australia 246-3 (Smith 35, Green 28) The old ball has been changed, though the England players don’t look particularly impressed with the replacement. Archer bowls a nothing over, his 14th of the innings. England look almost cooked. Almost.
“It’s 3.16 am in Minnesota,” says El Rose. “I may have chosen the wrong night to make the effort but it’s tonight or never.”
In the words of that great cricket commentator Richie Aprile…
[NB: Clip contains adult language]
Updated at 04.26 EST
47th over: Australia 243-3 (Smith 35, Green 26) A maiden from Atkinson to Green, much of it landing halfway down the pitch. Sometimes, bowlers drop short because human beings are not robots and they can’t always land the ball where they want to. But this feels like a deliberate tactic, one that is hard to fathom in the circumstances. O Matt Potts, Where Art Thou?
46th over: Australia 243-3 (Smith 35, Green 26) Jofra Archer returns to the attack. It’s only a partial exaggeration to say this spell is England’s last chance. He bowls a zingy short ball to Smith, who is hopelessly late on a pull stroke and top-edges it over the slips for four.
Smith makes a mockery of the previous stroke by leaning back to uppercut for six, a deliberate and utterly brilliant stroke. Quite why England are bowling so short, I know not. There is an argument that, in the face of formidable competition from day two at Perth, England’s performance today has been their worst of the series to date.
“I’ve been awake since 5.30am with nerves, not just for the cricket,” writes Sam Charlton in Leeds. “My incredible other half, Siân, is defending her PhD in AI for medical diagnosis and care this morning. So here’s to a successful defence, both in Siân’s PhD viva and England’s first-innings total.”
All the best, Siân! Let’s accentuate the positive: England have bowled so poorly that you are guaranteed to mount the most successful defence of the day. (But seriously, we wish you well. And if AI can do anything for plantar fascitis, I’m all ears.)
Steve Smith hits a six off the bowling of Jofra Archer. Photograph: Philip Brown/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 04.21 EST
45th over: Australia 233-3 (Smith 25, Green 26) A good over from Atkinson… until the last ball, which is fractionally short and pulled sweetly over the top for four by Green. Australia are giving England a taste of their own medicine, scoring at 5.17 runs per over. How do you like dem Bazball apples?
“Re: over 43 – you’re right, it is boring,” says Felix Wood, “but there’s nothing else that can be said. And it’s not really enforced errors plural – it’s a single unforced error repeatedly. Loose drive to balls on fourth or fifth stump. The most frustrating thing is that it’s not even like it’s relentless pressure from a phalanx of bowlers.
“How hard would it have been just to leave Starc’s wide balls until he got tired? He’s a phenomenal bowler, so no doubt he would have exploded some stumps with those yorkers, but at least make him work for his wickets. I’ve even bored myself here. This is what England have reduced me to.”
Weird thing is they played so sensibly against Bumrah for most of last summer. Perth and Brisbane are the bounciest pitches so it was always going to be a risky stroke… and I’m boring myself as well.
“Oh lord,” says Phil Harrison. “This is the series, right here isn’t it? England have to get this session right. If they do, wickets can fall in clumps under the lights. But man, if they don’t this is going to be a long, bleak few weeks…”
At least you can sleep through it.
Gus Atkinson replaces Brydon Carse for the first over after tea. He has two slips and a leg slip for Steve Smith.
Jake Weatherald, whose rapid 72 set the tone for Australia, chats to Adam Gilchrist
Yeah it’s great fun, obviously, a pleasure to be out here. The Gabba’s a great place to bat and the atmosphere for a pink-ball game is awesome.
[On his scoring rate] We always like to take the positive approach. They were aggressive with the short-ball stuff; it’s good to play off the back foot at the Gabba so they were a lot of scoring options.
[On the pitch] It’s still really good to bat on. As the game goes on, with the heat and everything, I think the cracks will play a part.
ShareTea/Dinner
44th over: Australia 228-3 (Smith 24, Green 22) With Stokes about to bowl, Smith pulls away due to the presence in his eyeline of a bearded fella in a gold rugby shirt, proudly clutching a plastic glass of 3.7% ABV Liver Compromiser, totally oblivious to his impact.
AFter four dot balls, Smith cover-drives for three with a flourish. Stokes is blowing. He ends the over, and the sessioon, with a wide full toss that is edged safely for four by Green.
Australia have their foot on England’s throat. They trail by just 114 and could take a decisive grip on the turn this evening. England’s bowlers were better than in the first session but still nowhere near their forensic performance in the first innings at Perth. They could be about to enter a world of pain.
43rd over: Australia 221-3 (Smith 21, Green 18) Carse is straining to get the ball fuller, the right thing to do on this pitch. When he overcompensates, an occupational hazard, Green drives crisply thorugh extra cover for three. He’s looked good so far. Smith looks anonymous, which is kind of ominous for England; he moves into the twenties with a squirt through point.
The ball isn’t doing a huge amount, and England won’t be getting a new one tonight. It’s important that England fans don’t get carried away; equally, it’s reasonable to suggest that IT’S ALL OVER KAPUT FINITO THREE YEARS’ PLANNING AND THE WHOLE BLOODY THING IS DONE AND DUSTED INSIDE FOUR DAYS I CAN’T TAKE ANY MORE DISAPPOINTMENT YOU CAN FIND SOME OTHER SUCKER TO DO 2029-30 I’LL BE AT A DIGITAL RETREAT ON THE KERGUELEN ISLANDS if they have a bad final session, the Ashes will almost certianly be staying in Australia. I know it’s boring, but the biggest difference in this series to date is that Australia’s batters have made fewer unforced errors.
“Soupçon,” says Patrick O’Brien. “I mean, yeah, well done using that word correctly and all. But admit it, you always say it out loud as ‘soup can’.”
Au contraire, I tend to go for the full, Amelie-style ‘Monsieur Quincampoix’. Possibly a cancellable offence these days. But it’s done with love!
42nd over: Australia 215-3 (Smith 18, Green 15) Another boundary, though there was nothing wrong with the bowling this time. Stokes squared up Green, who got a thick edge through the slips. Stokes effs and jeffs at the batter, prompting this exchange on commentary
Ebony Rainford-Brent I think Stokes was fuming.
Alastair Cook [deadpan] Can you lipread, Ebony?
You had to be there. Maybe it’s an alpha/allrounder thing but Stokes’ intensity seems to go up a notch when he bowls to Green. That and his F-word percentage.
41st over: Australia 209-3 (Smith 17, Green 10) Duckett makes a fine diving stop in the covers when Green punches a drive off Carse. A better over from Carse, with nothing too short; a maiden in fact. England are back in it!
“I’m currently following the OBO while sitting alongside my wife’s hospital bed, as she gave birth to our daughter Audrey at 11am this morning,” writes DanieL McDonald. “Mother and child are doing amazingly well, making me somewhat redundant. The first cricket game I attended was with my dad, the first day of the 1990 Ashes Test in Brisbane, where England were bowled out before stumps and squandered a good match position with a third-innings capitulation (familiar?). I won’t foist it upon her, but maybe Audrey’s first match will an Ashes Test in the new Brisbane Olympic stadium? Whatever comes her way in this crazy mixed up world, I hope she finds something that brings her as much pleasure as Test cricket, and especially the OBO, has for me. Thank you.”
Aww, many congratulations to Daniel, Audrey and the unnamed Mrs McDonald. And thank you for reminding us of Brisbane 1990. Peter Bloody Cantrell.
40th over: Australia 209-3 (Smith 17, Green 10) It’s mildly bonkers that a player of Green’s quality hasn’t scored a century in a home Test. This is his 17th, with his highest score the punishing 84 he made against India at Sydney in his debut series. He demonstrates his abuindant class with a beautiful extra-cover drive for four off Stokes.
Right, come on down and let’s play a game of spot the differences.
Australia, 1st innings of first Test 132 all out (2.91 runs per over)
Australia, since then 414 for 5 (6.06 runs per over)
39th over: Australia 204-3 (Smith 17, Green 5) Smith mistimes a pull off Carse so badly that the ball drops right in front of him; at the same time Carse falls over in his delivery stride. Elite cricket, the best of the best.
“England should have had a go with Josh Tongue, an expert in removing the tail but also taking wickets further up,” says John Starbuck. “Carse and Atkinson are both adequate in most cases but rather too similar as well, with not enough variation between them. Given that we can now rely on Archer to strengthen the tail, the others’ failures in three innings loom larger.”
I’ve never thought of Carse and Atkinson as being similar, but Tongue is certainly a point of difference. So is Potts, whose fuller length and ability to make the batters play would have been valuable on this pitch. He also gets good players out, right-handers especially, and was all over Smith in the ODI series in 2024.
Either way, I don’t love the selection of Jacks. Would’ve made sense in a low-scoring dogfight, but not this.
38.2 overs: Australia 200-3 (Smith 14, Green 4) A ripper from Carse hits Smith on the elbow, the same blow he landed at Perth. Smith wrings his hand in pain and then receives treatment; it’s not quite Graham Gooch at Trinidad in 1990 but he’s not enjoying the physio’s poking and prodding. Eventually the pain subsides and he takes guard again.
38th over: Australia 200-3 (Smith 14, Green 4) Cam Green is Australia’s new No5. That was well bowled by Stokes – close to the length Jason Gillespie spoke about a moment ago, with a soupçon of away movement to find the edge.
You’d imagine Stokes will settle into a marathon spell at this end, especially if he can get the ball moving under lights. I think he fancies Green too, having set him up beautifully in the first innings at Perth. Green punches a handsome drive that is very well stopped at mid-off by Archer. But he gets off the mark next ball, tucking an errant delivery to the fine leg boundary. England have been spitting out four-balls today.
ShareWICKET! Australia 196-3 (Labuschagne c Smith b Stokes 65)
Eeeeeesh, how England needed that. Labuschagne tries to force a good ball from Stokes and gets the thinnest of edges that is well caught by the tumbling Smith. The end of a terrific, quietly forceful innings from Labuschagne, whose 65 came from only 78 balls.
England captain Ben Stokes reacts after dismissing Australian batsman Marnus Labuschagne for 65 runs. Photograph: Dave Hunt/AAPShare
Updated at 03.14 EST
Josh Hazlewood is a doubt for the rest of the series after suffering another setback. At this rate, Australia will be able to play him as a specialist batter for the last two Tests.
37th over: Australia 196-2 (Labuschagne 65, Smith 14) Last winter I stayed up into the small hours and watched Brydon Carse bowl like a dream against New Zealand. He was forensic, intimidating, insistent, and he looked like a banker for this series. Alas, today he is bowling pure, unadulterated filth – and not the good kind.
The first ball of his eighth over is short on leg stump, and you’ll never guess what Labuschagne does with it?!?! You betcha: a pull round the corner for four more. Tihs is another reason England needed five bowlers, as insurance for somebody having an off day. Two sides to every story, though, and Labuschagne in particular is playing with clarity and ruthlessness. Smith cuts for three to bring up the fifty partnership.
Even Jason Gillespie, one of the most empathic, gentle and polite people in cricket, is going off on one in the commentary box about the performance of attacks in this game. “At Perth and Brisbane,” he says, “you want to bowl as short as you can while still getting the batsmen to come forward. In the modern game I’m seeing a lot of impatience.”
36th over: Australia 189-2 (Labuschagne 58, Smith 14) Stokes replaces Archer. His first ball is too short and pulled easily round the corner for four by Labuschagne. England picked the wrong attack – Matt Potts should have played, mainly to bowl to this pair – and have doubled down by bowling really poorly. But apart from that it’s been an unmitigated triumph.
In other news, this, from Chris Paraskevas, is an early contender for my favourite email of the 2025-26 Ashes.
G’day Rob. Hope you’re well! (I am properly pi$$ed.) Quintessential gorgeous Sydney day today peaking at around 35 degrees celcius in the arvo.
Had the Xmas work function off and the afternoon was shaping up to be an absomur3 disastwr when I realised I was the obly one hitting the turps (going at a strike rate of three drinks an hour) and then to top it off- The Old Fitzroy pub literally ran out of burgers (this is afrer I clweayrly saw thwir chef cooking 8 burgers when I accidentally walked into the kitchen lookingnfor the dunny).
Anyway long story ahort / sober: had to make do with fish and chips (doesn’tr really absorb the alcohol but that’s a grwat rhing upon reflection) At one point I averted complete catastrophe when the bartender came to remove my empty glass – only to realize I had the MBM and a stream of the game fired up and the phone rreasted against the glass.
Might hit the Bottle-O and keep the party going all night, this game is actually going to g0 past 2 dayz (m??+?!?!?!?!?).
How good is life inn Australia / the permanent shadow of the pub!?“PS. England bowlint …. bad.
Just say no, kids.
(Btw you can see Chris’s short film here. It’s not about his Christmas party.)
Updated at 02.58 EST
Fifty for Labuschagne
35th over: Australia 182-2 (Labuschagne 51, Smith 14) England’s Carse has taken a serious spanking, with 54 runs coming from his first six overs. Labuschagne gets four more with a top-edged pull over the keeper’s head – and those runs take him to a vital half-century from only 67 balls. He’s back.
Smith forces two more later in the over. Carse’s figures would look a bit grisly in an ODI, never mind a Test: 7-0-61-1.
Updated at 02.53 EST
Thanks Angus, hello everyone. We’re about to enter the twilight zone, and unless England have a very good second half of the day, the Ashes hopes of this team will never be seen again. The next few hours are positively Brobdingnagian.
As the sun sets on Brisbane, Jofra needs a spell and so do I. Time to hand the pink pill of the OBO to Rob Smyth and bid you all adieu. Enjoy the twilight zone, folks!
34th over: Australia 175-2 (Labuschagne 46, Smith 12) Archer continues and immediately draws an edge from Labuschagne’s dropping hands. It falls well short of the slips though. Third ball is slower and fades down leg-side where Marnus helps it along with a gentle caress that steers it past the fielder at fine leg for FOUR. I’m surprised Archer hasn’t been spelled here. he is clearly tiring and has shown signs of a side strain. Is Stokes taking unnecessary risks with his strike weapon? Or has he simply got nowehere else to turn?
An email from Stephen Holliday thinks “there’s something quite nostalgic about all this. An utterly toothless England with no ideas other than to huff and puff and get burnt foreheads, and an Ashes series over on the morning of the fourth day of play. It’s like before Trump. Before social media. Before the internet. Endless summers without a care in the world. Really happy days. I approve!”
33rd over: Australia 170-2 (Labuschagne 41, Smith 12) Change of bowling as Atkinson gives way to Carse… and Ben Stokes issues a snarl straight away as he’s forced to Atkinson’s stop skew off the boot and gifts Smith two runs from the misfield. Smudge takes another two from the fourth, a leg-side no-ball, and then drives FOUR through mid-on from the last as Carse continues to leak runs.
32nd over: Australia 161-2 (Labuschagne 41, Smith 4) Archer enters his 11th over, the most of any England’s bowlers and the most frugal too. He’s going for just 2.36 per over and has the wicket of Jake Weatherald to his name. Given their history, Smith and Labuschagne seem happy to wait Archer out and attack the change bowler. Will Stokes risk Carse again, despite him giving up nine an over? He’ll have to roll the dice because Archer looks done and Labuschagne lifts him for SIX over fine leg to prove it.
31st over: Australia 155-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 4) Australia’s run-rate has dropped to 5.11 since Weatherald’s exit and Atkinson is slowly turning the screws on Smith, delivering a maiden. Looks like Archer is going to keep this spell going. England are going for broke.
30th over: Australia 155-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 4) Breathe easy, England fans. Jofra Archer has resumed his spell and his first ball is 139kph, still a good clip. Smith lets it pass down leg-side but he pulls the second square and steals a run. Archer tosses down a 146kph bumper and Labuschagne ducks it, rising with an impish grin.
Australia’s Steve Smith and Marnus Labuschagne run between wickets. Photograph: Robert Cianflone/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 04.20 EST
29th over: Australia 154-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 3) Footage on air now is showing Archer in consultation with the England physio on the boundary. He’s staying on but looks to be stretching out his flanks. Atkinson is still rolling at the other end, faster and tighter than in the first session. He draws an ugly flash from Labuschagne first ball that sends Marnus back into his shell for the rest. A maiden ensues.
28th over: Australia 154-2 (Labuschagne 35, Smith 3) Archer is still delivering at 140kph but seems to be tiring a little. Smith works an overpitched ball for three and then another full one gets lashed through the covers by Labuschagne. Seven from the over.
Steven Smith bats in the second session on day two. Photograph: Hollie Adams/ReutersShare
Updated at 02.22 EST
27th over: Australia 147-2 (Labuschagne 30, Smith 0) The Old Firm of Steve Smith and Marnus Labuschagne reunite following Jake Weatherald’s departure for an excellent 72. Smith sees off two deliveries from Atkinson, happy to watch awhile.
Updated at 02.14 EST
WICKET! Weatherald lbw Archer 72 (Australia 146-2)
Breakthrough! Great bowling by Jofra Archer. He got clouted for four last ball and sought revenge. He has nailed Jake Weatherald bang in front. No appeals to the third umpire by the batter. He knows he’s gone. And sure enough, replays show it hitting middle stump halfway up.
Jofra Archer celebrates dismissing Jake Weatherald. Photograph: Cameron Spencer/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 02.13 EST
26th over: Australia 141-1 (Weatherald 68, Labuschagne 29) Marnus steals a single and leaves Archer to Weatherald who is loving life as a Test cricketer. All the more now, as he crunches a late cut to the rope. Strewth, that was brutal. He took it off the third rib and it rocketed to the boundary. But Archer’s reply is a yorker and it’s got past the bat and thundered into the pads. Big shout!
25th over: Australia 141-1 (Weatherald 68, Labuschagne 29) Gus Atkinson’s girded loins continue to deliver tighter lines but minimal threat. He’s throwing them down at 137kph and angling it back in at the stumps. It’s all going well until Weatherald steps back and cuts like a knife behind point for FOUR.
Guy Hornsby doesn’t like what the new dawn has delivered in the UK but, like all stoic Poms, is looking on the bright side: “Well that’s a sobering score to wake up to Angus! But we’ve been here many times before. England bowled 2nd XI stuff in the first session, but you have to hope they’ll have had a bit of a talking to in the break. And looking at how they’re coming out so far, it seems to have worked. There’s a really long way to go and we have the lights to come, so we are still right in this, we just have to bring the stumps into play. And pray.”
24th over: Australia 137-1 (Weatherald 64, Labuschagne 29) As Archer rolls to the crease, Jake Weatherald begins mouthing mantras. Lip readers, please write in to tell me what he’s saying to himself. Or is he just pouting and pussing like Mick Jagger? Whatever he’s doing, it’s working and he’s having fun out there. He clips Archer for another single as Australia take their target under 200.
23rd over: Australia 133-1 (Weatherald 61, Labuschagne 28) Atkinson has been given a fresh spin. His first four overs went at almost six an over but he yields just a single to each batter here. Perhaps tea has girded his loins for the new session?
Darryl Accone is following from South Africa: “At lunch at the Gabbatoir, the best-laid plans of Bazzers and men lie in waste after Australia’s Baz-like start to their innings. It’s good to see cricketing intelligence whip cricketing inflexibility, to see respect for fundamentals trump the self-hypnotising mantras of a mindless cult.”
22nd over: Australia 131-1 (Weatherald 60, Labuschagne 27) Jofra Archer enters his sixth with 0-9: frugal figures but he’s paid to make breakthroughs. Weatherald works him for a single but Archer responds with a good line outside off to Labuschagne. Tight bowling but England need aggression from Archer.
Players are taking the field for the second session of this pink ball Test. Jofra Archer looks full of beans (perhaps, literally) and is pawing at the ground like a wolf watching a rabbit on the horizon. Mind you, so is Jake Weatherald. He has thumped 59 from 56 for his first Test half-century and looks hungry for more. Here we go…
With England reeling and Australia rolling, Stephen Smith is keeping calm rather than carrying on: “We’ve had a horribly traditional first innings 334 with a big score from the big man [the 183cm Joe Root] (his red inker and subsequent 70-odd average soothes me). And now top order runs in reply. Take away the run rate and this just has too much of a feel of an actual Test match. Where’s the flash where’s the pizzazz where’s the chutzpah? Hopefully Jamie Smith emerges after lunch with his hard cricket replaced by an e scooter helmet to get this all back off track.”
Tom Banks isn’t quite as hopeful and asks. “Too late to fly out Jimmy?”
Updated at 01.40 EST
Tea: Australia 130-1 (trailing England by 204 runs)
Advantage Australia.
The home side still trail by over 200-runs but on the evidence of that session they will reach and breach that target before the day is out. England may have edged day one and piled a few more runs onto an entertaining 10th-wicket partnership this morning, but they have dropped their bundle on day two through loose bowling, a dropped catch and abysmal body language.
As Brian Withington writes in from Blighty under the gloomy headline ‘Fill Your Boots’: “The generosity of most of our batters has been surpassed by the bowlers, with a smorgasbord of long hops spiced with the occasional half volley. Bon appetit!”
Joe Root’s unbeaten 138 was magnificent but Australia have erased it in a session. Can the visitors recover their mojo after lunch and give themselves a sniff of squaring the series? Or will Australia pile on the runs and rain down more misery?
Time to grab a bite and wet the whistle. We’ll be back in halfa.
Ben Stokes leads England from the field at tea. Photograph: Hollie Adams/ReutersShare
Updated at 01.18 EST
21st over: Australia 130-1 (Weatherald 59, Labuschagne 27) Stokes enters his sixth over with 0-32. He should be working on his lunchtime speech instead. It will need to be Henry V-at-Agincourt-esque to get England up for the second session. They are flatter than the Barmy Army choir right now. The run-rate is 6.19 and rising and both batters are set, stealing singles at will and slapping every loose ball to the rope.
20th over: Australia 125-1 (Weatherald 57, Labuschagne 25) Good change-up, England. Spinner Will Jacks is into the attack. Can he add a little more egg to the face of Australian selectors who left their own spin champion Nathan Lyon out of the XI? Not immediately he cant. First ball beats everyone and runs for four byes. Ouch. Now another FOUR as Weatherald taps a legside drifter to the rope with ease. A cut square yields another single. Jack now delivers a rank full toss and Labuschagne bludgeons it down the ground for yet another boundary.
Will Jacks bowls his first over. Photograph: Dave Hunt/AAPShare
Updated at 01.35 EST
19th over: Australia 112-1 (Weatherald 52, Labuschagne 21) Since the dismissal of Travis Head, Australia have actually accelerated. This Labuschagne-Weatherald partnership is now worth 32 from as many balls and England look in the doldrums. They have given up 16 boundaries 18 overs and lunch cannot come soon enough. Stokes is trying to lead from the front but this Gabba pitch looks to be flattening.
18th over: Australia 109-1 (Weatherald 50, Labuschagne 20) FOUR more for Weatherald as his hip clip yields an eighth boundary. That is a terrible ball first up from Carse. And now the Tassie tiger doubles the dose, lifting Carse over slips. One bounce, over the fence. Australia’s 100 is up in just the 18th over. And now Jake Weatherald pulls sweetly for his FIRST TEST FIFTY. Well played, young man! That half century came from just 45 balls and featured nine fours and six. Now Labuschagne gets in on the action, pulling another short ball to the rope. And now he DOES IT AGAIN, driving down the ground. That’s 17 from the over!
Jake Weatherald raises his bat after his first Test 50. Photograph: Darrian Traynor/Getty ImagesShare
Updated at 00.54 EST
17th over: Australia 92-1 (Weatherald 41, Labuschagne 12) Weatherald works a single to maintain his strike-rate of 100. He continues to look the part at Test level. Labuschagne is into his 60th Test and now shows why, leaning on a full ball from Stokes and sending it down the ground for FOUR. He takes another two through mid-on to make it eight from the over.
Ben Stokes reacts after Marnus Labuschagne hits him for four. Photograph: Jason O’Brien/ShutterstockShare
Updated at 00.54 EST
16th over: Australia 84-1 (Weatherald 40, Labuschagne 6) Dangerous leave, Marnie! Carse got that one to duck back and it shaved the off stump. Oohs and Aahs ensue as England bask in the dopamine squirt of Head’s dismissal. That will sober them up a little though. Labuschagne cuts crisply through the slips cordon for FOUR.
Updated at 00.42 EST
15th over: Australia 80-1 (Weatherald 40, Labuschagne 2) Massive bounce for Ben Stokes! And again Labuschagne makes a late decision to shoulder arms and almost comes undone as the ball ricochets off his gloves and narrowly misses the stumps. That’s how Jofra Archer did Marnus in the first innings at Perth. England’s fans are up and about now England have their first, the prized scalp of Travis Head.