A series where artists share their musical firsts and lasts.
“I was so hopeless as a teenager, so very, very — I guess what the kids call ‘emo’ now.”
Photo: Jacob Moscovitch/New York Magazine
Over the course of her career, the Grammy-winning singer Hayley Williams has released six albums with Paramore, two solo albums, and 17 recent solo songs, in the process spanning genres and performing with everyone from Taylor Swift to hardcore-punk band Turnstile. What were some milestone moments along the way? Let’s find out.
I was so hopeless as a teenager — I guess what the kids call “emo” now. I had the lyrics to “Faces in Disguise” by Sunny Day Real Estate written in Sharpie over my bed on the wall, and I did it at, like, three different places I lived: I long to take you to a secret place where we could lay aside our past / We’d throw the world away with all its pain, to shine like stars through storm and clouds and rain.
I’m a yearner, and that song, to me, is in the yearners handbook.
It was “Mirtazapine.” I listened to it right before I sang it at Newport with Jack Antonoff, because I was like, Please, dear God, don’t forget your own lyrics at this show. I forgot the lyrics to one of my favorite Paramore songs on the Eras Tour in front of 90,000 people.
The first instrument I ever learned was piano and, quickly after that, drums. Basically anything I could learn from my granddad, who was a great musician, a great songwriter.
It was like a Garnier box red dye.
Carman, who was this Christian artist that was like, literally in drag all the time. He was like a drag king, and he was fabulous. Don’t get it twisted! But for a really, really long time, I was very embarrassed by this fact. So I would lie and say that my first concert was ’N Sync, because I did go to an ’N Sync concert when I was pretty young. My dad took me, Mandy Moore opened. Then one day, I was talking to a friend and finally decided to fess up. And I’m not kidding, she was like, “That’s exactly what I did. My first concert was Carman. But I told everyone it was ’N Sync,” and that was kind of the basis of our friendship. If you grew up in the South and the Bible Belt, you rode hard for Carman and — lowercase-g, god rest his soul.
The first song I wrote by myself was “At Night.” I’m sure it was just the most dramatic thing you can imagine. But the first song I ever wrote with the Paramore guys was “Conspiracy.” I came to band practice with them and we did not know there was going to be a song at the end of the day. I had a poem that I brought written on a sheet of paper and they had music and it was sick. It sounded like Thursday’s “Standing on the Edge of Summer,” or “Understanding in a Car Crash.” I was like, This is heaven. And we left that day with our first song.
I think Paramore’s first TV performance was Conan in 2007, with “Misery Business.” We had just gotten back from Japan and were severely jet-lagged. We really wanted a mariachi band to do the intro, because we had that on the record, and he made it happen. I’m a giant Conan O’Brien fan, so to start our late-night debut on his show was a big deal to me.
I have a distinct memory of staring out the window of my mom’s car — once again, drama — and Semisonic’s “Closing Time” was playing. I felt really like it just got to me. Still could. End of a school day, I can still remember the street we were on in Meridian, coming home from school and just being like, I don’t want my mom to see me crying. And I don’t think that was even because it was “Closing Time.” I was trying to be tough. That song just will do it to you.