I stopped asking AI for answers and started asking for frameworks — and suddenly it all clicked

There’s also the issue that, like an eager puppy, AI wants to please you, its owner, and when you ask it for advice, it tells you what it thinks you need to hear, not what’s good for you. It doesn’t always see the big picture.

If what you need is help with something simple and functional, like the correct wording to write an email to contest a parking fine (I’ve used it for this exact purpose this week, and it did a great job), that’s one thing, but if you’re asking ChatGPT whether you should break up with your partner, or quit your job, that’s something else entirely.

Instead of describing a problem to your chatbot and asking “What should I do?”, try adding “Don’t give me an answer, give me the framework I need to make this decision myself” to the end of your prompts. I’ve done this with numerous problems now, and it forces you to actually work through what you think and feel, and it supports you in coming to your own decision.

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Quite often, the AI will give you a 10-step framework to run on your problem. It starts by asking you to define the real problem, and it goes on from there with steps specific to what you’ve asked. It can be an illuminating process.

Don’t expect the framework prompt to work for simple questions, especially ones where there’s one answer, like “Who is the President of the United States?”, but for hard questions, it’s a great option.

Try it, and I promise you that if you work through all the steps, you’ll get a much clearer picture of what you need to do, and you can reach your own conclusions without the existential guilt of having handed an important decision over to a non-human AI.

You might not get an instant answer, but you’ll end up with something more useful — a decision you actually believe in.