“Don’t you ever say no?” an exasperated fellow grandmother asked her adult daughter recently. Rather than tell their children off, today’s “gentle” parents spend ages explaining why it’s not a good idea to lob a toy car at their baby sister or climb on to the kitchen table. Grandparents, by contrast, I find are much more likely to just say no.
David, whose grandchildren are four and two, says: “Sometimes I just can’t help reacting with ‘Hey! Don’t do that!’ when the four-year-old is doing something that could end in disaster, like swinging on a chair near a glass cupboard, or grabbing something precious. If his parents are around they very carefully and deliberately explain to him. Sometimes there’s a bit of tension.
“What’s slightly irritating is that my son-in-law usually says something like, ‘you know that grandpa worries about that’, not ‘you shouldn’t be doing that’.”
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Up to 75 per cent of us in the UK are not drinking enough water.
The human body can survive for a time without food, but it cannot survive for long without water.
Here are the signs you need more fluids, according to a GP.
How much we should drink
Water is the most vital component for life.
6-8
NHS guidelines advise we should be drinking six to eight glasses of fluid per day.
This does vary depending on our activity levels, the weather, and if we are ill.
80%
An estimated 50-80 per cent of our bodies and brains being made up of water.
It allows us to deliver nutrients to cells in our blood, lubricates our joints, regulates our temperature and much more.
How to stay hydrated
What to drink
Not all fluids are the same – water takes top spot, as it hydrates without sugars or calories, but lower-fat milks, sugar-free drinks or moderate amounts of tea and coffee can all count towards fluid intake.
Caption: Asian girl grocery shopping in supermarket. She is choosing fresh fruit juice along the beverage aisle, reading the nutrition label and checking ingredients on the bottle. Making a healthier food choice and balanced diet. Healthy eating lifestyle
Photographer: d3sign
Provider: Getty Images
Source: Moment RF
A reader bemoans that his children spend money on fancy coffees and holidays with friends, never having a penny left each month
(Photo: Getty/Gorica Poturak)
What to avoid
Limit smoothies and fruit juices to 150ml per day because the sugar causes dental decay.
Signs you’re not drinking enough
1. Our brains
The pain from migraines is sometimes described as feeling like you’ve had an axe blow to the head (Photo: Getty)
When dehydrated, we can display an exaggerated response to pain and experience headaches. Concentration, attention, reaction times and short-term memory can also all be negatively impacted.
LIFESTYLE
6 min read
Signs you’re not drinking enough
2. Our bodies
Another common sign of dehydration is constipation. Our skin can look duller, be less bouncy to the touch and be less elastic.
Tired Asian businesswoman working on a laptop computer in the office – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
(Photo: Ekaterina Demidova/Getty).
3. Our psychology
Research has shown that even mild dehydration can lead us to feel more moody, stressed and irritable. We can also feel more tired than usual, with less energy and motivation.
Quick and life-changing tricks for a calmer, tidier home
Easy habits to declutter your home
I need someone to tidy up my attitude towards tidying. Who does one hire for that?
(Photo: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
The habits audit
Subconscious habits can cause clutter so take regular pauses to stop and notice what you are doing during the day.
The re-entry reset
Establish a routine you follow every time you come home so the entrance stays clear.
Two young children wearing school uniforms exit their front door – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Late toilet training has become more common, putting pressure on teachers and taking up learning time (Getty)
The exit mindset
Each time you leave the house, take a minute to think: ‘What can I take out with me?’ To the tip? To the charity shop? To recycle?
Easy habits to declutter your home
The drop zone
Doing a clear-out for charity doesn’t need to be a big task. Have a donate box in a practical location to drop any unwanted items as you come across them.
(Photo: Westend61/Getty).
(Photo: Getty).
Dedicated home
Create a logical home for everything so it’s easier to find and keeps everything in place.
Easy habits to declutter your home
The quick scan
Each time you open a drawer identify a few items you can bin, donate or return to their rightful home.
Woman carrying box while moving and cleaning up at home happily – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Follow these rules to declutter your own home (Photo: Nadzeya_Kizilava/Getty/E+)
One in, one out rule
To manage wardrobe clutter follow the rule that a new item can only go in if you give something else away.
The daily check-in
Give yourself a few minutes at the start or end of the day to acknowledge the progress you’ve made.
Woman Refreshing the Bed with Clean Bed Sheets in a Bright Room – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
It can be far easier to seek an internal promotion rather than a new job elsewhere
The statistics
A trend of ‘job hugging’
12%
In January, available vacancies were down 12 per cent compared to a year prior.
According to the ONS it marked 39 consecutive quarters of decline.
51%
of UK employees plan to stay in their current roles, as Employment Hero’s first Annual Jobs Report shows. Four in 10 say competition is too high to take the risk.
So how can you improve your current situation without leaving?
Learn to humble brag
Your wins don’t always speak for themselves. Share them. Jump into conversations beyond your usual remit. How people see you today shapes the opportunities that come your way tomorrow. Even small updates can have an outsized impact.
VICTORIA MCLEAN, CEO OF CITY CV AND AN EXPERT IN CV AND PROFILE WRITING
Drive Talent Investments with Strategic Workforce Planning. A female job-seeker answering questions during a job interview with a human resource manager in a business office. – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Make your case – with data
Caption: Mid adult man with eyeglasses sitting on a comfortable sofa at home, thoughtfully writing notes in a small notebook while natural sunlight illuminates the room
Photographer: Milan Markovic
Provider: Getty Images
Source: E+
Keep a log
The chances of your boss remembering what you achieved in Q1 by December is low so keep a success log.
Treat it as a proposal
Show impact, link it to organisational goals,
and outline future
value, says McLean.
Male candidate handshake with the recruiter at job interview – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
(Photo: Shutterstock).
Don’t be shy
Ask your boss directly what you need to do to be promoted in the next six to 12 months.
Offer solutions to problems
Ask yourself: what keeps your organisation awake
at night?
Solve those problems and you shift from just doing your job to being a strategic asset.
Sharing your ideas and views with the people above you can really prove what you’re capable of.
Proactively initiate new projects
or processes.
It ‘s daunting but getting people to see you in a more elevated position before you get there is really effective.
Caption: Worried businessman biting his nail while waiting for a job interview with other candidates in a hallway of an office building.
Photographer: skynesher
Provider: Getty Images
Source: E+
Ask for training
It’s a fantastic signal to show how serious you are about your development.
As careers are no longer linear, a promotion may not be in your current role, but perhaps in the same company in a broader role.
Do some digging to find out what else might be available in other areas.
How to resolve the biggest rows that can end marriages
Private school, sex and housework can be some of the biggest causes of tension between warring couples.
Mike Talbot, a psychologist, and chief executive of UK Mediation [below], reveals how to fix them.
What couples row over
Parenting and schooling
Young couple having an argument. Woman is angry with man. – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Psychologist Mike Talbot says parenting can expose ideological differences in a couple. He encourages people to listen to each other, and find a “third way”, something that they come up with between themselves, rather than sticking to one person’s opinion.
OPINION
3 min read
Money (or a lifestyle)
Caption: A mature couple sitting in bed and looking at each other angrily after a disagreement
Photographer: kupicoo
Provider: Getty Images
Source: iStockphoto
It’s common for couples to disagree on their property or finances.
Couples might have different ideas about what the best plan of action is for the future.
Dr Talbot says its important to find “common ground” on what both parties wish for, or worry about.
Agony Uncle
5 min read
Incompatibilities around sex
Dr Talbot has seen this when one person loses their sex drive. “It can happen when the couples get older, and she loses her sex drive during menopause, whereas the guy’s still as randy as he was when he was 20.”
Caption: Young couple having relationship difficulties at home. Both about 25 years old, Caucasian people.
Photographer: GoodLifeStudio
Provider: Getty Images
Source: E+
Copyright: DAMIR MIHAJLOVIC
Caption: Millennial black lady vacuuming floor while her husband watching TV, not helping her with household duties, cropped view. Unrecognizable young couple having problem with domestic chores
Photographer: Prostock-Studio
Provider: Getty Images/iStockphoto
Source: iStockphoto
Domestic workload
We get people disagreeing about how tidy the house should be, how neatly dressed the kids should be…
This goes back to the gender stereotypes.
The solution is to focus on value and to get the couple to think about the conflict in a different way.
Being a grandparent
is complicated
Celia Dodd, who looks after her grandchildren two days a week, says
there’s a fine line between being supportive and interfering.
Here she shares the things she’d never say or do with her own family.
What grandparents should never do
Ignore parents rules
It’s important to know what’s expected rather than second-guessing what the parents want, and possibly getting it wrong.
(Photo: Getty)
Caption: Parents and young child moving into a new house, unpacking belongings from cardboard boxes
Photographer: Vladimir Vladimirov
Provider: Getty Images
Source: E+
Send endless snaps
Friends understandably get irritated if you keep sending photos and long videos, especially if they’re longing for grandchildren of their own.
I’ve made it very clear to my own daughter that if she needs full time childcare, she’s going to have to sort that out herself (Photo: PeopleImages/ Getty)
What not to say
I wouldn’t do it like that…
The golden rule for grandparents – don’t offer advice unless it’s asked for, and never interfere – is almost impossible to get right.
You might feel like – how can you not interfere when you’re doing your best to support the family? It’s a fine line, and there are times when you’re bound to get it wrong.
What grandparents should never do
Grandchild, twilight parenting, grandparents, grandmother, baby, exhausted, tired – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Assume involvement
Although it’s a shock, it’s simply not on to drop in whenever you feel like it.
Beat yourself up
Being a grandparent is never 100 per cent bliss, despite what people say. Childcare can be boring as well as fulfilling.
(Photo: Paul Bradbury/Getty).
Naps before 1pm can lead to better cognitive performance in the following hours (Photo: Lord Henri Voton/Getty Images)
Admit tiredness
I don’t want them to stop asking me to babysit, and I certainly don’t want them suggesting I’m doing too much.
What grandparents should never do
Forget the years fly
Grandparents have to keep finding new ways to keep the connection close, by tapping into what your grandchild loves doing.
Conflict of family two generations old mother and adult daughter – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Grandparents and their young grandchildren relaxing at home – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Dismiss the parents
Even if you don’t agree with the way things are done – like using gentle parenting –
it’s a big help to understand why they are doing it rather than just dismiss them.
The price, size and variety of eggs differ
But which is the best value
for money and taste?
Food Editor Sophie Morris
tested 15 supermarket packs, scrambled and fried.
Her findings? The most expensive wasn’t the best.
Supermarket eggs taste test
M&S Golden Yolk Eggs
These shells win the beauty contest and the yolk colour is amazing when scrambled. 4/5
Taste the Difference
These Sainsbury’s eggs taste as good as they look with gorgeous orange middles and a rich flavour. 4/5
St Ewe Rich Yolk Eggs
These are “higher welfare” free-range eggs but the yolks taste no better than other high-end eggs, says Morris. 4/5
Supermarket eggs taste test
Aldi Golden Yolk Eggs
Winner! The Specially Selected eggs are a great price with a delicious yolk. 4/5
Savers Small Eggs
Morrisons Savers eggs are great for the price (£1.10) but not rich in flavour. 3/5
Burford Brown Eggs
They taste great, but not noticeably better than the other high-end eggs. The spend is more to do with branding. 4/5
Supermarket eggs taste test
7Tesco Finest Bluebell Aruacana
The pale blue shells won me over but the insides are just as rewarding with a rich flavour.
4/5
8Waitrose Duchy Organic Eggs
Their sunny yellow middle scrambles beautifully into light, fluffy folds.
4/5
9Lidl Deluxe Golden Yolk Eggs
They’re a great deal and the yolk is a lovely bright orange and the taste is rich and eggy.
3.5/5
Supermarket eggs taste test
M&S British Free Range Eggs
Large eggs with brown shells and a light orange yolk and they’re a great price for high-welfare large eggs. 4/5
Ocado Large Free Range Eggs
These are the best value large eggs that I try. The yolks are a dark yellow and the eggs turn out a lovely rich and fluffy scramble. 4/5
Supermarket eggs taste test
Packington British Free Range Eggs
Pretty white eggs with a yellow yolk that taste fine but, given the price, I expected a little more. 3.5/5
Supermarket eggs taste test
Waitrose No.1 Longstock Gold Eggs
They are delicious: meltingly rich, they scramble into fat folds. They have beautiful green shells, almost too pretty to eat. 4/5
Caption: Eggs are seen in a carton on Monday, April 13, 2026, in Portland, Ore. (AP Photo/Jenny Kane)
Photographer: Jenny Kane
Provider: AP
Source: AP
Caption: A detail of cracked egg falling into the pan as woman holds egg shells in both hands.
Photographer: SimpleImages
Provider: Getty Images
Source: Moment RF
Asda Organic Mixed Size Eggs
The yolk is a pale yellow and when scrambled the result is an unappealing yellowish grey colour. These are the most bland-tasting of the lot. 2/5
Food inflation could reach as much as 10 per cent by the end of 2026
Why you should stockpile
The modern food system is incredibly efficient – but that efficiency depends on a constant flow and just-in-time delivery. Stockpiling, at its best, isn’t panic buying. It’s creating a small buffer between us and a system that was never designed to pause.
Séamus Higgins, author of Food and Us: The incredible story of how food shapes humanity
Supermarkets will find ways of holding down the price of the basics, and try to make their money on the fancy lines (Photo: Roy James Shakespeare/Getty)
What you should consider buying
Tap water is generally safe to drink in Europe (Photo: Klaus Vedfelt/Getty)
Bottled water
While we are accustomed to free-flowing water, in recent years, supply has failed for a number of days in many areas of the UK.
Canned essentials
Morris keeps tomatoes, beans, pulses, chickpeas, lentils and fish in her cupboard.
Chickpeas are a great source of protein (Photo: Christian Mouysset)
Many of us like to add milk to our tea, so you may be wondering whether that affects its benefits (Photo: Maca and Naca/Getty)
Tea and coffee
As prices vary, and are increasing, it’s good to bulk buy if you can.
What you should stockpile
Dried goods
A base of dry goods, like rice, pasta, oats and flour, are the backbone of a reliable pantry. Make sure bags are stored correctly and replace them when they go out of date.
Caption: Asian girl grocery shopping in supermarket. She is choosing fresh fruit juice along the beverage aisle, reading the nutrition label and checking ingredients on the bottle. Making a healthier food choice and balanced diet. Healthy eating lifestyle
Photographer: d3sign
Provider: Getty Images
Source: Moment RF
Caption: Close up of a woman preparing a wholesome breakfast by pouring oats into a bowl from a plastic free jar with fresh berries.
Photographer: Dougal Waters
Provider: Getty Images
Source: Digital Vision
Copyright: Dougal Waters Photography Ltd
UHT drinks
UHT dairy, squash and long life milks and juices are worth keeping for emergencies.
What you should stockpile
A well-stocked freezer is also important, but it doesn’t need to be a huge space.
Focus on versatility and rotation in fruit, veg, fish and bread, and buy what you’ll use.
Caption: Close-up of peanut butter on toasted bread on light gray plate. Food background.
Photographer: Yuliia Zaitseva
Provider: Getty Images/iStockphoto
Source: iStockphoto
Peanut butter, or a jarred treat like jam or Nutella, is also a good idea.
Nut butters are a great source of protein, fibre, has a long shelf life and can be used on savoury and sweet foods.
Want to slow down brain ageing? Try a hobby
The hobbies that slow brain ageing
Practise a musical instrument
A study of 108 amateur musicians in the journal Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences found those with more musical experience had better attention control.
Caucasian mid adult patient writing a diary while recovering in the hospital ward – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
Caption: IVANO-FRANKIVSK, UKRAINE – NOVEMBER 13, 2022 – Musicians of the NAONI Orchestra (National Academic Orchestra of Folk Instruments of Ukraine) hold a concert at the Ivan Franko Academic Regional Ukrainian Music and Drama Theatre in Ivano-Frankivsk, western Ukraine. (Photo credit should read Yurii Rylchuk / Ukrinform/Future Publishing via Getty Images)
Photographer: Future Publishing
Provider: Future Publishing via Getty Imag
Source: Future Publishing
Journal in the evening before bed
Reflecting on your day supports your memory as you’re rehearsing the things you’ve done, especially if you do it with pen and paper, says Prof Catherine Loveday, author of The Secret World of the Brain.
The hobbies that slow brain ageing
The flowering gardens at Cawdor Castle (Photo: Dennis Barnes/Getty/Stockbyte Unreleased)
Garden for 20 minutes
Connecting with nature replenishes cognitive resources and boosts vitamin D levels, says Loveday.
Join a knitting group
Knitting improves coordination and working memory – your brain’s ability to store and use information according to the British Journal of Occupational Therapy.
Senior female friends spending leisure time knitting while sitting at table in retirement home – stock photo. (Photo: Getty)
As society sees the largest ever intergenerational shift of assets, younger clients will need people they can relate to, instead of relying on AI and social media for financial advice (Photo: Getty)
Learn a language
Learning a second language helps improve our ability to retrieve words.
The hobbies that slow
brain ageing
Games, like Minecraft, helps improve spatial representation, speed and reaction times.
Reading fiction twice a week stimulates the language parts
of the brain, says Loveday.
One study also found that chess players had better cognitive reflection and greater focus.
LIFESTYLE
5 min read
Grandparents have seen so many parenting trends come and go, from Penelope Leach to Tiger Mothers, that it’s hardly surprising they raise an eyebrow at gentle parenting. Monica, 58, whose grandsons are seven and nearly two, says: “The current parenting zeitgeist has gone back to something I saw in the 1980s, that the most important thing is that children can express themselves wherever they are.
“It worries me that they might turn into monster children who don’t get invited to things, although my daughter and her wife now recognise that the children need to learn how to behave in different settings. The problem is that child-centredness is often confused with child-inclusiveness.”
Most grandparents were brought up to mind their manners and never answer back. In their day, being called “spoilt” was the most shaming insult, so no wonder they worry that child-centredness could create a generation of kids who think their feelings are the only feelings that matter.
Their concerns are echoed by some teachers. David, who looks after his grandchildren one day a week, says: “I respect my daughter’s approach, even if I don’t always agree with it. But I worry that gentle parenting won’t do the children any favours when it comes to adapting to the world when they get older and go to school. They won’t be able to question what the teacher does or be an equal partner with the adults they come across.
“I think parents not wanting conflict with their children is key. They think they’re being kind but actually they’re giving kids a false impression, which is that they are equal partners. They’re not. Ultimately, what the parent says has to be what goes. So while the old way of bringing up children – to obey grown-ups without question – is clearly wrong, going too far in the other direction is wrong too.”
Grandparents roll their eyes at grandchildren who run riot in cafes and climb all over the furniture, graze constantly rather than eating at the table, are encouraged to express their feelings freely, choose their own clothes and can’t go to sleep without an adult by their side.
They worry about children who refuse to hold hands crossing the road, and get frustrated by the interminable explaining that keeps everyone else waiting. And then there are the endless choices: Do you want your toast cut into triangles or squares? Do you want to go home now?
Andrea, 65, has three grandchildren under five. She says: “The three-year-old is allowed to eat whatever and whenever he wants. But what’s really bad is that he wastes food – he insists on having his plate piled high, otherwise he yells and puts his head on the table. But then he doesn’t eat the food.
“That happens a lot and it infuriates me. I haven’t said anything, although I worry that if they don’t curb it soon it could be a problem when he’s older. The other thing I don’t like is that the children can’t go to sleep without somebody with them. I think it’s ridiculous but I have to go along with it, so I end up lying on a mattress beside them, and when I try to creep out, they wake up!”
If children aren’t used to being told off by their parents, it comes as a nasty shock when a grandparent says no or loses their temper. I’m haunted by the time I shouted at my three-year-old grandson for touching something I’d told him not to. He wept inconsolably while I felt horribly guilty, and it took a good hour for us to recover.
Andrea had a similar experience with her five-year-old granddaughter: “We often take the two older grandchildren to a local cafe and we all love it. Last time while we were paying the bill they both went a bit wild – shouting, rushing about and disturbing the other people. The five-year-old was just having fun and winding her brother up, but when I told her to stop she thought it was funny. I thought that was terribly rude, and I said I wouldn’t take her there again unless she behaved. She said, ‘I’m not going to talk to you until you lower your voice’, which I suppose is something her parents say to her. That made me absolutely furious. I said, ‘Don’t speak to me like that,’ and marched them out of the place.
“I think my granddaughter and I were both terrified at what had happened. I was so upset and really worried about how we were going to get over it, but later on she said, ‘I love you grandma’. When I told my daughter about it she looked very uncomfortable and told the children that they have to respect our rules when they’re with us. I don’t want to interfere with their parenting but I was very relieved that she said that.”
Differences in parenting ideas are a common source of tension and even conflict between the generations, particularly now that so many grandparents do childcare. It’s clearly important for the grandchild that the adults are on the same page, but talking about parenting can make both grandparent and parent feel criticised and defensive.
Instead of telling the parents about how they feel grandparents are more likely to grumble to each other. David says: “As a grandparent, I think it’s good to be yourself and do what comes naturally, in fact it’s essential. But it’s also not good to get into fights with your son-in-law or daughter-in-law. So sometimes it’s easier to keep quiet if I disagree with something the parents are doing. That’s fine because basically we both want the same things, we just have different views on the ways to make it happen. I certainly don’t think I’m right and they’re wrong. In fact I’m very aware of my own shortcomings, both as a parent and a grandparent.”
Parents, meanwhile, agonise about telling grandparents not to do something, and that’s especially awkward if it’s their mother- or father-in-law. Andrea says: “If I ever tell my granddaughter not to do something, my son-in-law doesn’t say anything, but I have noticed that he takes her away from me. I don’t know if it’s for my sake or hers! The other day the three-year-old hit his sister when I was in charge. I said, ‘Say you’re sorry’, but my daughter, who was working in the next room, intervened.
“She told me: ‘We don’t make them say sorry straight away, we get them to think about it and process why they should say sorry.’ I think that’s a bit too sophisticated for children that age. In principle, I think gentle parenting is good because it’s about treating children with respect. But I’m not sure the children understand all the explanations. I also think there’s a danger of getting too slick about feelings. I think children learn to talk about their feelings in a way their parents want to hear.”
The best advice I’ve heard on dealing with a clash of parenting ideas comes from Professor Geoffrey Greif, who studies family relationships at the University of Maryland. “Grandparents shouldn’t automatically assume their own views on child-rearing are right,” he says. “Instead they need to be open and curious about how the next generation is thinking about parenting.”
Some grandparents find that the best way to take the heat out of conversations is to make it less personal. Checking out the parenting gurus the parents follow is a good start. Rosa came to this solution after a couple of disagreements when she was looking after her granddaughters, who are six and four. She now asks her daughter to send her parenting podcasts if she’s heard a good one. “I’m really interested, because it helps me understand how she’s parenting. And it allows us to have a neutral conversation, and that can be really helpful, because neither of us feels criticised. Some podcasts talk about stuff that I really wish I’d known when I was bringing up my own children, but I think others create unrealistic expectations.”
Celia Dodd is the author of ‘Grand Expectations: The Joys and Dilemmas of Being a Grandparent‘