Amanda Holden struggled to hold back tears as she gave an insight into how she dealt with the loss of her stillborn son, Theo, and shared beautiful way she remembers him
11:47, 01 Feb 2026Updated 11:59, 01 Feb 2026
Amanda Holden breaks down in tears as she opens up about her grief after her son was born stillborn
Amanda Holden broke down in tears during an emotional chat with her close pal Alan Carr as she gave an insight into how she dealt with the devastating loss of her son Theo in 2011 who was stillborn.
Since dealing with the heartbreaking tragedy, Britain’s Got Talent judge Amanda, 54, has done her best to raise awareness and money for charities helping families with their grief.
The actress turned presenter stars alongside pal Alan Carr in their show, Amanda and Alan’s Greek Job on BBC and she opened up about the experience in an intimate chat with the comedian.
Amanda recalled the harrowing moment and insisted she sought comfort in the fact that Theo had chosen her to be his mum for the few months she was pregnant. She also said that she always refers to herself as a mum of three. Amanda is mum to two daughters, Lexi and Hollie.
Amanda Holden breaks down in tears as she opens up about her grief after her son was born stillborn
Amanda Holden insists that she will always refer to herself as a mum of three despite tragic loss of her son Theo in 2011
The TV personality explained to the Celebrity Traitors winner: “I always say I am a mother of three. Because I am. When we lost Theo, there wasn’t one moment where I thought ‘why has this happened to me?’ But there also wasn’t a moment where I blamed God or anything.”
She continued: “And the way I accepted it was to think that he chose me, just for those few months, to see what it was like to live, and develop, and be in the universe. Then the universe took him back. Now I don’t think that’s religious, but I let him go back.
“And that was my belief, rather than he went back to Heaven as such…I felt like he went back into the universe and he is still out there and is part of our family.”
The TV star’s candid admission came as the pair were sat in a church. In response, Alan comforted the star and said: “Yeah, you’ve got to process it in some way. You’ve got to make some kind of sense of it haven’t you.”
And it was at this point Amanda said: “It was the only way I could make sense of it. I was like gosh I was so lucky to have him for all that time. And even though he was born sleeping he was perfect.”
Struggling to hold back tears as she recalled the moment her son was born stillborn, she explained that she always says that she is a “mum of three” as she insisted “Because I am.”
And it did not take long before her fans and celebrity pals rushed to social media platforms to express their love for the star and show their support.
One of the first people to pen their support was Loose Women panellist Myleene Klass who wrote: “Love you Mandy x.”
And a follower then wrote: “As a midwife I just want to say that’s such a beautiful way to hold such precious memories and feelings towards your baby born sleeping x x.”
Meanwhile someone else said: “Such a poignant moment, look how Alan listens so carefully and accepts you and lets you tell your story your own way without interrupting or adding anything, what a beautiful friendship. I’m sure you will have helped others Amanda is very brave to share this. What a beautiful way to think of your precious little boy.”
And a fourth person said: “Oh my you have just brought comfort to so many through your own grief, you are a beautiful soul.” Last year, Amanda paid tribute to her son, who would have turned 14 years old.
Sharing an image on her Instagram Stories of a burning candle, she captioned the post saying: “Our beautiful boy would have been 14 today.”
But this is not the first time Amanda has spoken about her heart wrenching loss. She has previously said: “He looked so normal and so peaceful. I held him in my arms and I said goodbye, basically. But I couldn’t have done it without the incredible team around us. My husband was so strong and so amazing but they got him through it too.”
She continued: “And then the days and months afterwards, the same team of people checked on us every single day and it’s not because I’m off the telly or famous or anything like that.”
If you have been affected by this story, advice and support can be found at Sands (stillbirth and neonatal death charity). You can call them on 0808 164 3332 or email helpline@sands.org.uk
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