My parents came over to England from Nigeria in the late 1950s, Dad to study law, Mum to study teaching. I was born in 1965, the youngest of three, in Hackney Hospital, a true Cockney. Dad was called to the Bar in 1970 but went back to Nigeria a few years later. He became a chief magistrate there, but in March 1999 he was murdered — killed by car thieves. I was devastated. I was 33 by then, playing professional rugby league for London Broncos.
When we were kids, Mum would fly back and forth to see Dad and I’d see him at Christmas and holidays. It was tough on Mum, so she sent my brother and me to Woolverstone Hall, a boarding school in Suffolk for city kids run by the Inner London Education Authority. That’s where I first fell in love with rugby. But I failed my A-levels — I was only interested in sport.
I was always the runt of the litter in my family. My brother and sister both got degrees — I’m the only one who didn’t. It was, like, what are we going to do with Martin? I had dreams of being a professional sportsman but rugby union was still amateur in those days. I moved back to London to play for Rosslyn Park, one of the top London sides. That’s where I got my nickname, “Chariots Offiah”, from my team-mates, after the film. Our surname is actually pronounced “Off-ee-ah”, but I’ve always liked the brand name!
I scored a lot of tries playing for Rosslyn Park at the Middlesex Sevens at Twickenham in 1987 and soon afterwards got the phone call that changed my life. It was Doug Laughton, the rugby league coach at Widnes. He said, “Martin, you’re going to be one of the greatest wingers ever to play this game,” and he offered me a £50,000 salary.
I only really knew rugby league as a northern game that was sometimes on TV. I still had dreams of playing union for England but I wasn’t picked for the World Cup squad of 1987, and I didn’t know where my life was going. Doug upped the offer to £85,000, so I made the switch. In 1992 I moved to Wigan — and there’s now a statue of me outside Wembley Stadium, on my knees in the pose I did when I scored a length-of-field try in the 1994 Challenge Cup final for Wigan against Leeds.
I hardly ever saw my dad by then, but he came to watch me playing for England in the 1995 Rugby League World Cup final against Australia at Wembley, which we lost 16-8. And then four years later he was murdered. It was horrendous but I could either crumple or fight. I’ve always tried to turn any negative things in my life into fuel on the pitch. The week after his death I went out and played for London Broncos and scored my 447th try, becoming English rugby league’s top try-scorer and third in the world. I went on to score 501 tries before retiring from rugby league in 2001 and I still hold that English record.
• When I fell in love with rugby: Martin Offiah
I was first introduced to Virginia, my wife, at a party in 2003. She was a photographer and a model. The following year I went on the first series of Strictly and then the Christmas special, and someone said to Virginia, “That geezer you met, I just saw him on telly.” We met up again and we’ve been together ever since.
I felt I was destined to be a dad of boys, and that they would need a dad to be present in their lives. Tyler was born in 2006 — and was throwing a rugby ball when he could barely walk. There’s a video of me tossing him a ball and he’s in a nappy on the kitchen floor. It was in his genes. I took him to Rugby Rats, for under-fives, at our local club, Ealing Trailfinders. When he was eight he caught an interception, ran the length and scored.
Now we’ve got two kids who are both potentially going into professional sport. Tyler is 19, on a contract with Bath and in the England U20 squad. And Phoenix, who is 16, is a footballer, in the under-16s academy at Spurs. I give them advice but I’m still “Dad”, so to them I know the least. Tyler always says, “Dad, you scored one try 30 years ago, get over it,” and I’ll correct him and say “501”. I tell Tyler, “Most of my success is in rugby league, so in union, all you’ve got to do is get a cap for England and score a couple of tries to beat me!”
Fortunately, he doesn’t have the trauma in his life that I had. But trauma does build resilience. I try to remind him how important it is to dictate your own narrative.
Tyler
My earliest rugby memory is being taken down to Ealing Trailfinders, under-fives. I used to hate getting mud under my fingernails but I loved running ball-in-hand. I was, like, you know what, I’m going to try to be the best at this. It’s less about what my dad has achieved, it’s more about what I enjoy.
At home it was me and my brother versus Dad play-fighting. I’ve always been a WWE and UFC fan. We’d try to jump Dad but it didn’t go well because we were quite ticklish, so he’d just tickle us. Mum wasn’t playing — no chance — but she’d be watching, enjoying it. She didn’t like stuff being knocked over — she’d say, “Do it in the garden!”
Martin, Tyler and his younger brother, Phoenix, getting ready on Martin’s wedding day in 2017
I got a sports and academic scholarship to St Benedict’s school in Ealing and then went to board at Wellington College in Berkshire for sixth form. I’m now doing politics and international relations at Bath University while at the Bath Rugby Academy. It’s going all right. I got a 2:1 in my first year. I’m happy with that.
• Martin Offiah’s son wants to break scoring record — then star in Hollywood
And I’m in the England U20 squad for the Six Nations. It’s always an honour to be selected — I was excited as soon as I saw the email. I only participated in one match last year, against Scotland, so I’m hoping to be more involved this year and prove what I can do.
I’m quite an independent person, so I don’t get homesick, but it’s still nice to get time with family after training camps. At Christmas I was training with Bath but we got a few days off. Mum cooked a great roast as she does every year. Mum does most of the cooking; Dad will do stuff here and there, on request.
I’m aware I’m coming from a different place to Dad. He had two Nigerian parents who weren’t from a successful background, though they got good jobs eventually. I went to private schools and was living in a nice part of London. I feel like there’s a difference.
I’ll always take his advice — any input he has I take incredibly seriously, which I definitely didn’t do early on in my rugby career. But in the end any decision I make is of my own will.
The Six Nations and its U20s competition runs until mid-March; sixnationsrugby.com
Strange habits
Martin on Tyler
He wore shorts every single day at primary school and only started wearing trousers when he was forced to at secondary school
Tyler on Martin
He loves young people’s shows like Love Island. Even Mum thinks it’s silly, so he watches it by himself!