Problem <\/p>\n
Is it possible to change the mind of a husband who refuses to make an estate plan?\n<\/p>\n
From G.T., via email<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve been wanting my husband to get an estate plan done since we were 50 years old. Now we are 65, and my husband is still dragging his feet. He says that I can quit nagging him, but it bothers me, knowing we have a nice farm and three children. I don\u2019t want to be a nag, but I want this estate planning done! Our son and grandson, who farm with us, would like to have a plan in place, but they hesitate to rock the boat. What can I do?<\/p>\n
\u2014From G.T., via email<\/p>\n
Solution <\/p>\n
Well, G.T., nagging has a negative sound to it, kind of like dripping water. Maybe we can just call it \u201cpersistent requesting.\u201d\u00a0\n<\/p>\n
It would be great if there were a simple answer of how to motivate your husband to move forward with planning. One thing he should keep in mind is planning not only would help future generations and the farm but it also would help you. If he should pass away before you, you\u2019d be left to handle this, and in my experience, widows don\u2019t enjoy doing estate planning by themselves.\n<\/p>\n
Here are a few questions and thoughts that may be motivating:\n<\/p>\n
After years of risk and sweat to acquire assets, doesn\u2019t he want to have firsthand involvement in the distribution plans?\u00a0Wives are often the peacemakers among the children. If your husband should die before you, you\u2019d become the referee. That could damage your relationship with your children.Appeal to your husband\u2019s knowledge of the numbers, including the cash flow needed for farming, even if you know this information. Chances are, he\u2019ll have a strong opinion.Without a plan, your estate may add an unwanted beneficiary: the government. There are potential estate\u00a0tax concerns, depending on the size of your estate and your location.There are many examples of an unexpected death bringing disastrous consequences to a family without a plan in place. Do you want to be \u201cthat family\u201d people talk about?Identify a big operator in your area. Ask your husband if that operator would be\u00a0interested in your land if your farm were to fail\u00a0without a plan.Can your husband really look at the next two generations and say they are not worth planning for?How would he feel if he were in your son\u2019s or grandson\u2019s shoes? Frustrated? Nervous? Confused?Who would be more competitive: a farm heir who inherits a clean balance sheet, or one who spends the rest of their life buying out siblings?The last resort may be to tell your husband you don\u2019t plan to remarry if he dies but if you did, would that concern him? I joke with people that if I died, I think my wife would remarry. I don\u2019t know who that guy is, but already I don\u2019t like him. I don\u2019t want there to be any threat of that person getting any of our family assets or having a say where those assets go.<\/p>\n
With proper guidance, the process for getting a plan in place can be rewarding and comforting. There are all kinds of reasons your husband should want to be part of it, because it truly is an unwanted task for the surviving wife to make\u00a0these decisions solo.\n<\/p>\n
G.T., if none of the suggestions I provided help, then I guess you\u2019ll just have to keep nagging.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Problem Is it possible to change the mind of a husband who refuses to make an estate plan?…\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":192982,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[84,4176,4174,4175,56,54,55],"class_list":["post-192981","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-personal-finance","tag-business","tag-finance","tag-personal-finance","tag-personalfinance","tag-uk","tag-united-kingdom","tag-unitedkingdom"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/192981","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=192981"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/192981\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/192982"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=192981"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=192981"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.newsbeep.com\/uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=192981"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}